I keep hearing and seeing stories of people who had major complications or either died after surgery. I am so unsure now if I truly wanna go forward with this. I'm so scared. I am up in arms about this. I will pray and ask God to please guide me and help me to make the right decision.

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It's only natural to feel apprehensive. Yes, this is major surgery, but the overwhelming majority of surgeons would not take you on if they thought you were a high-risk patient to begin with.

You didn't offer many details. Do you have any other health issues? How old are you? Have you ever been under general anesthesia before? What is your support system like?

When you read only stories about people with the worst possible outcomes, it begins to appear that many, many people suffer from complications. Statistically, that's not the case. If you have an experienced, competent surgical team, you can expect a terrific outcome.

You do realize that some complications are caused mainly because patients are irresponsibly non-compliant with their surgeon's discharge instructions or they don't follow other recommendations? Advancing your diet, being sedentary following surgery... you have considerable control over your actions -- things that would greatly minimize your chances for a complication.

Prior to surgery, we see many professionals along the way whose job it is to explain to us what to expect, etc. (and often it seems as though they explain the same stuff over and over until we want to scream!) That said, these face-to-face meetings are intended to prepare you for your journey ahead. If you pay attention, ask questions, and make a sincere effort to follow their advice, you'll be fine. Really.

How about sitting down and writing yourself a letter? Be sure to include of all your fears and concerns. Then wait a day or two.

When you re-read your letter, pretend that you are reading this letter as though you're a good friend of the letter-writer. Now answer your "friend's" letter. Try to be comforting and understanding. Try to be positive and reassuring.

You might actually surprise yourself at what a good friend you can be... to yourself.

Share your letters here, if you think they might help someone else.

Edited July 10, 20188 yr by Missouri-Lee's Summit

Hello? Are you out there? Are you still feeling unsure about WLS?

It's one thing to be unsure about getting WLS surgery and all the lifestyle changes involved and another thing to be unsure about the surgery itself. Millions of people have had successful surgeries with few or any complications. Why not tell yourself that you will be among all those people who will have a successful surgery, too?

Edited July 12, 20188 yr by Missouri-Lee's Summit

Don't be fightened, don't be scared. Surgeries are smooth and easier than they once were. Anesthesia has evolved from either and that ilk to effortless slumber. You want something to worry about? Worry about continuing to be obese, worry about being more prone to bad diseases. I have lived 72 years being close or completely obese. That My younger friend, is a living death I would wish on only my worst of enemies. And that is why , at an age when many retire, I am going forward in a little over a month for my own surgery. And my recovery may not be as smooth as someone your age, but. the joy of an continued life outweighs any pains and sorrows I may encounter because I will still have a chance to live. It may be my last chance to ride the merry go round but I'm reaching out for the ring there anyway!