If you've been telling everyone in town and elsewhere, including dearest family members, dearest friends, co-workers, storekeepers, the neighbors, the babysitter and all others about contemplating surgery and been stunned by the negative responses, consider the following.

Did you give them your Social Security number, and bank statements and credit card numbers as well?

What?

You wouldn't?

Why not?

You think that info is personal and not their biz? You really do?

Golly, gee, who'd a thunk it?

I didn't tell anyone but my mum and my friend. My bf doesn't even know.

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What a freakin concept!

I only told my hubby and you strangers , I agree, no ones business!

Yeah, I'm here every day because I want to discuss it with people who don't judge me. There is no need for me to share it with folks who would. No one who doesn't live in my house knows.

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I agree with Vinasu. I told my immediate family about the surgery and that's it. My mom, on the other hand, is telling everybody. She doesn't get why I would keep this to myself. She's never suffered the stigma of being obese.

She also shares with everybody that she's a diabetic. Pre-op, I would go to lunch with her and the waiter/waitress would ask us if we want bread or dessert after the meal. My mom would reply "I can't. I have diabetes." I told her that you can just say "no, thank you" and that's it. They don't have to know your condition. Sometimes I think she wears her disease like a badge and she doen't get why I wouldn't do the same.

I agree with Vinasu. I told my immediate family about the surgery and that's it. My mom, on the other hand, is telling everybody. She doesn't get why I would keep this to myself. She's never suffered the stigma of being obese.

She also shares with everybody that she's a diabetic. Pre-op, I would go to lunch with her and the waiter/waitress would ask us if we want bread or dessert after the meal. My mom would reply "I can't. I have diabetes." I told her that you can just say "no, thank you" and that's it. They don't have to know your condition. Sometimes I think she wears her disease like a badge and she doen't get why I wouldn't do the same.

Hi, im new to this site and havent replied to anyone but your comment is so relatable. my mom had cancer and tells every soul thatll listen. i mean shes a survivor and should be proud but i on the other hand am very shy when it comes to stuff like that. she also told me why the hell be ashamed? but its not that im ashamed its just that, what does it benefit others to know ? i understand you completely.

I had my sleeve done yesterday, my husband is the only one I told, not even my mother who is judgemental. I would have not told my hub if I could have gotten away with it! For me, one of the challanging issues is that I had to have it done where I work. Very uncomfortable because I know all the anesthesia docs personally. And within the whole hospital system (food runners, lab techs, nurse supervisors and admission clerks, I have no doubt I will be outted! I had no choice but to have it done where I work, ins would not cover any other hospital....but the bright side of that is that I wouldnot have qualified anywhere else. Starting weight 235, no comorbidities. Everyone struggles in there own way, the people here get it,

Once I decided to blog about it, it didn't make much sense to try and keep it secret. LOL. However, I will disengage from conversations where people have quit listening to what I have to say and are only trying to push their attitude and opinion on me.

@@theantichick, I'd think that the ones who quit listening would evaporate into the ether, i.e., transfer their affections to a different blogger. Wrong. The internet has everyone wanting to have his say. Every idiotic thought is newsworthy, doncha know.

I actually managed to have surgery and a two day hospital stay in, not just the hospital, but the actual building I work in without anyone noticing... I told my assistant yesterday because she keeps getting me giant coffee drinks to go with all the holiday asked goods she is bringing into the office.