I wonder if being fat determines your hobbies, your perceptions on what is important, your goals OR is it the other way around? For example, if someone is fat and into computer gaming, did the person get into gaming because outdoor sports are too difficult at the heavy weight or did an interest in sedentary games make the person fat?

What do you think? I see posts all the time on here about people who lose weight and are suddenly ironman athletes, interested in high energy activities. I have to wonder if being fat is what forms and shapes hobbies, careers, and dreams, rather than "video games make kids fat".

chicken and the egg question - which came first, the fat person who stays sedentary or the sedentary person who becomes fat? (This excludes those rare active folks that were fat anyway.)

Of course! It effects EVERYTHING in your life. I know for me it determines my salary, my love life and even the kind of car I drive. My best friend and I are making a top 100 list of reasons to lose weight. I am going to post it here on this thread when I am done with it.

I know it's a mistake, but I think of thin women as being arrogant bitches. In trying to become thin, I need to get over that so I can be thin and still be myself. (nice, but maybe not so much of a doormat that I am now)

When we don't feel good about ourselves, when we feel FAT, we feel like we're not in the same class with our Normal co workers, we try harder. We smile more, we don't our anger or bad feelings show.

Society encourages us to feel that way. It's like we don't count as a REAL person with REAL feelings, because we look a certain way on the outside.

I know I am know as The Positive One. I do get walked on alot, but that is changing. I have perserverred and won have some respect.

I do feel like a second class citizen, being the largest person in the office. I am also the only one who has lost 29 lbs in the last 4 months.

Hopefully, with continued wt loss I can regain my self esteem and be more confident. Stand up for myself and feel normal.

It's sad but very true. Fat descrimination is very real

I liked video games as a kid and I was still pretty active. Honestly, my parents probably should have just left my weight alone when I was 9, 10, 11, and puberty might have taken care of the 10 to 20 pounds they (mostly dad) determined was a problem.

I think that being fat restricts the hobbies you have, but doesn't choose them. Fat or thin, I would still like anime and video games and computers. I'm just one of those geeky type people. But, when I am thinner, I might also like other more active things, you know?

Oh, heavens. I'm fat and an arrogant bitch. Weight has nothing to do with arrogance or bitchiness.

I think you are buying into the mainstream media's horse patootie. They want everyone to be thin, boring and vapid like they are. I was a very, very thin child and I gained weight due to clinical depression in my late 20s. I've recently read that some fat people carry a virus that turns stuff into fat cells. I think there are many reasons why people are fat and easy answers are not going to be forthcoming. Be happy that you are doing something about it. Be happy that you can afford to do something about it. Lots of people can't.

My hubby is a total and complete geek and he falls into "normal" body weight. But yes, I do see my self doing a lot more physical activity as I loose weight, and things I would not even consider doing right now. Like riding roller-coasters, or going white Water rafting. These are things I want to do, but am limited because of my weight. But even at a normal weight, I don't see myself joining a soft-ball team.

It is a super interesting question. I hope to have a great answer for you in two years

I tend to think it is a matter of metabolism. I have been rather sluggish and non-athletic all of my life. My children's father is lean and very active. I have two children. My son is like me...tends to be overweight, sluggish and non-athletic. My daughter is lean, active and more athletic! So I believe it is more about how you are hard wired.... if you have a sluggish metabolism, you will tend to gain weight and not be very energetic. I am still a slug at heart, but I make myself go to the gym and I enjoy it because it does give me more energy than I would have otherwise.

For me, I experience fat discrimination in the work place mostely. I have been in management for several years now, and usually manage anywhere between 80 and 200 employees at one time, with the help of 1-3 other managers and 1-2 other supervisors. It is a HARD job, managing people. A lot of the employees are young, in the their 20's. I started managing in my 20's, and now I'm in my 30's. Over the years, I have gained weight. With age comes more respect, but with weight gain comes more disrespect. Being the only fat manager is hard. I have to work 4 times harder to earn people's respect. I have to PROVE to the staff that I have the ability to do my job. Where the other managers can walk into a room and gain instant respect because of how they look. My old co-worker is a perfect example. Him and I worked so well together, both had lots of experience and great ideas to increase sales, etc. BUT, we looked opposite. He was 36 years old, great shape, HOT AT HELL... and here I was: 236 pounds, hair not bleached blond, didn't wear the nice girly-suits that hugged my body, etc. The staff treated us totally different. Let's also not forget the fact that I am a woman and he's a man and well right there is a challenge in itself. I'm not complaining about our staff, but more about society and how we look at people. It's just a true fact that people are thought of differently when they are overweight: dumb, lazy, incomp, etc. During my stay at this one location, I did join a weight loss group and took off 30 pounds. As the weight came off, I did notice a difference in how the staff treated me. They would approach me with a smile instead of a look of demand. They would wait till I was off the phone to ask me a question instead of inturrupting me. They would show more respect for me in front of other co-workers instead of disrespect.

I could go on and on and on about this subject. In fact, I am.

So, I'll stop now. By losing weight you change your entire life. It's such a positive thing. I can't wait 'till I'm at goal and then I will have nobody and no 'thing' to blame anything on again. If somebody treats me like crap, it's because I deserve it. Period.

Thanks for listening!

I have been overweight and I have been slim but I have never, ever been into sports and physical activities other than walking and physical labour. I really like walking and physical labour has a point to it. :bounce: Gym was a major source of humiliation for me when I was in highschool. :phanvan I have always preferred to do academic work, or to read, paint, write, travel, and socialise with friends. I guess the only other physical activity I was nuts about was getting laid.

I can be foul-tempered but I am working on this....:heh:

I dont believe that being fat is a moral failing. But I believe it happens often to certain personality types. Its a chicken or egg thing for sure, too, but I think some people just have personality types, which when combined with certain metabolic types = obesity.

My son, and my DH for example. DH's entire family are honestly the laziest people I have ever known. They just dont move. They are not lazy in the moral sense - hard workers, they all exercise, but their natural inclination is to sit, so if Doug goes out for a run with me, I will come home and keep moving all day, he comes home and sits down. He doesnt overeat greatly yet is overweight, so is his mother. His father and his sister are both terribly inactive too but very skinny. My two sons couldnt be more different, one is like Doug's side of the family, he enjoys his basketball and volleyball, runs around at school but at every time in between will be found doing something inactive like playing his gameboy. He's approaching puberty and getting alarmingly heavy. Ewan on the other hand does all that plus runs around outside from dawn till dusk and is skinny as a rake. You can see a mile off that Fraser is going to be heavy like both Doug and I.

But I also notice here, and again its chicken and egg, but over the course of the two years I've been here, you see SO many people who are such victims. People who you can tell just have not taken responsibility for what they put in their mouths, and for what exercise they do. You can hear it in every sentence, this isnt their fault, that isnt their fault, they cant HELP that they're stuffing themselves silly before the op, I mean, that's last supper syndrome right? So that excuses it. People who are having troubles with PBing due to overeating, eating the wrong things, people who arent losing becuase they're eating the wrong things, people who dont exercise, there are just a lot of people you find in an overweight community who just refuse to take the bull by the horns and take responsibility for what they've done to themselves. I think there very definitely is a set of personality traits that make you prone to getting fat.

And that's not a judgement becuase I suffered from it as much as anyone else. I'm naturally quite a lazy person and dont have a lot of willpower. I like to treat myself, give myself little rewards, etc. I'm still like it to a large degree, which is why I needed a band. And its certainly a generalisation, there's loads of absolute go getters who get fat for different reasons - lack of time to spend on themselves when they have high powered careers for example.

i find with myself it was always more of a self esteem issue.. but then again i had low self esteem from the kids at school always making fun of me... So i do feel this has held me back from doing a lot... Like i always wanted to go join the soccer team... but i was to afraid to be laughed at... I wanted to try out for the play but was afraid of what people would think of me... So ya i guess being "fat" holds you back if you have low self esteem... Even my family would always say your never going to get a job, boyfriend. etc if you don't lose weight .. and my mom constantly put me on diets since the age of like 8.. This all has an effect on our personality and Self esteem....

There is so much that can be said about fat discrimination... I mean im fat (and im working on that) but that doesn't mean i am stupid (im running for valedictorian at my school with a 4.0 g.p.a) ... I'm not lazy (i work 56hrs a week and the rest of the time i either spend doing chores/ running errands or studying for my exam in October) i mean sometimes i feel a little lazy and want to sit down and veg out on the couch but so do skinny people...

People Stereotype "fat" people just like there is stereotypes for religion or ethnic background etc.

I wish this is something that can be stooped but people are going to think what they want to think.:cry

I'm 43 and have been heavy since my early 20's. I've never ever felt discriminated against because I'm fat. I think that maybe that has more to do with my personality than with anything else. I can't ever remember being looked at as anything less than my counterparts simply because I'm fat. I have high self esteem; I refuse not to. I've seen other overweight women berate themselves and shrink away when they should stand their ground. It's as if they think that they deserve to be treated differently than everybody else so they accept it. I don't know how to explain it because I've never felt that feeling, but I recognize it when I see it. It makes me so mad! The little chubby mousy girl who doesn't dress well or put on makeup or fix her hair; it's like she gets up in the morning and says to herself, what's the point? I wish I could give those girls some of my energy, whatever it is that makes me refuse to do that. I hope I'm not offending anybody by trying to express myself and I may not be making my point as eloquently as some others here do, but basically, what I'm trying to say is that you get treated the way you allow yourself to be treated.

What would make you think you would deserve to be treated like crap? No one deserves to be treated like that. I know people who act inapprobriatly and treat people badly, losing patience and yelling at them because they are frustrated or some other reason they rationalize in their own sick mind. And because people are afraid of them. this bad behavior is allowed to continue. It is still wrong.

When someone interupts you on the phone, simply stop, excuse yourself for a moment from your phone call and ask the rude employee nicely to please wait a moment until you are off the phone. Sometimes you need to treat them like a child, if they act like one. Don't allow this disrespect for yourself or anyone else.

You are in the positon to change things for yourself and maybe even someone else.

Blessings,

I was overweight way before I had any control over what I put in my mouth. I was chubby as a baby and as a toddler. My weight progressed from there and it killed my self-esteem. Even times when I took off some of the weight I still felt insecure at times. Some people are predisposed to be addicts. It is extremely difficult to be a food addict because it is like tellind an alcholic to control his or her drinking. They may be successful for a period of time but it will eventually progress again. I want the band to help me control what I can't. Just because I need help controling my eating does not mean I am a victim or think like a victim. Over-eaters have an illness that needs to be treated like any other illness. We need to stop feeling bad about ourselves for losing control. I'm taking responsibility by getting help with the band.