Hubby said I was real quiet for the first several days after surgery, just really got "back to myself" yesterday. So, so far, no crying jags or super-B fests at him or kiddo. Figured maybe I'm just lucky enough to have a smooth ride through this mess.

Nope.

I have a sister who's 19 years older than me, and granted in many ways she's more of a mother to me than our mother. However, I get tired of her telling me things like she's the end-all-be-all of information for me. Especially when she gets it wrong half the time, and just tells me I don't know yet when I point out that she's wrong. For Pete's sake, I'm a freakin' NURSE and she'll lecture me about a medication or a condition and she's misunderstood something, but by gosh, it's absolute fact because she says it.

So she had the sleeve several years ago and has been harping on me to get it ever since. Telling me I can't possibly lose the weight without the surgery, it's the only option for me, etc. If there's one single reason it's taken me this long to get to it, it's because of my knee-jerk reaction to try and prove her wrong. Well, she's right about the surgery, but ever since I decided to get it, she's been lecturing me on what I HAVE to do, and how I HAVE to do it. I've tried to shrug her off saying I'm already on support boards and have plenty of research materials at my disposal (I'm in grad school so I have online access to several medical libraries) and am fine. Well, it's not the *right* support group unless it's *her* support group (not this one, obviously). Her guru on that board is the end-all-be-all of sleeve surgery success advice, I just HAVE to ask her about whatever thing it is sis is lecturing me about this week. The Protein shakes I ended up with aren't the good ones. I need to be taught how to make shakes taste better. I have to "change the pH of my water" in order to drink enough, whatever the frak that means. By the way, I'm pretty sure the lemon Mio flavoring doesn't do jack about the pH of the Water no matter how much she tells me it does.

Now I post on my FB that I'm still struggling to get in my water and protein goals, and she's lecturing me that the fluids are more important than the protein. No, duh. But I'm not going to abandon all protein because I haven't gotten my fluids in, especially since my Proteins are in the form of fluids, for pete's sake. One is not exclusive of the other. ARGH.

I love my sis, I really do. Most of my life I've just shrugged off her overbearing lectures.

Today, I'm ranting here in order to keep from biting her head off, because I know she means well, and I know this is just hormone dump from the weight loss (down over 13 lbs since surgery).

But OMG she's on my last freakin' nerve!!

I'm glad to hear you're doing well enough to be irritated Nothing but empathy here, I have a mom who sounds a lot like your sister. I love her to bits, but I swear, if something isn't HER idea, it's a BAD idea. When I told her and my dad I had decided to have this surgery, the first thing out of her mouth was "I TOLD you to try those diet pills I told you about!! If you'd just take them, you wouldn't need surgery." And then it was off to the races with every false narrative about WLS that any of us have ever heard. Once it became apparent that I was going through with it regardless, she came around and has surprised me by NOT becoming an expert on all things VSG.

Hang in there, and as you well know this is temporary. My worse hormone dump was more of a hysterical crying jag, only one little anger explosion...it gets better

I've probably had a few dumps... but no one really notices because to them its just me being a b... instead of them reading the stuff I showed them... *shrugs* funny thing is my roommate and I are getting along better lately, and my youngest sister that I've always gotten along with basically told me to go f... off and she'll see me on the holidays if she has too... haven't spoken to her since, and seriously all I did was accuse her not letting me use the car for a class I had to go to because she wanted to hang out with her boyfriend - the way I felt about it is that she could handle3 hours away from him...

*shrugs* I did apologize to her. but I'm kinda tired of being the one that always takes it, so outside of the last things I said to her, and she just responded with I love you sissy - basically her apology. I'm tired of being the adult and letting things go and being the first to break the ice - it makes me feel desperate and weak.

Edited August 22, 201610 yr by Raenh

Yikes! Know-it-alls annoy me, too. But I take the beating from them because I'm a naturally passive person. But once I've had enough, they'll know it, lol! I'm sorry she's so frustrating. I think it would probably be a good idea to tell her you no longer want to discuss the gastric sleeve topic, since you and her continue to go back and forth with it. Just tell her that you know she means well, but that it's easier for you to discuss this on a forum. If she keeps bashing the forum, then tell her you no longer want to discuss anything weight related. If she can't respect that, then she doesn't deserve your company. It's harsh to say that, but I know what it's like to be around pushy people.

That sucks, maybe have a chat to her calmly and explain that while you appreciate her concern and know that it is coming from a good place, that you think you have it under control and if you need advice you will let her know.

In regards to the Water thing..

She is actually correct. Water can have a hard surface area, by adding something to it, it makes it "softer" hence easier to get down.... when you are early out, this makes a big difference on how it sits in your stomach... because when it is hard, it can be heavy on your new tummy

You can add lemon, water flavoring, cordial, etc to make it easier on your tummy.

Edited August 22, 201610 yr by AussieGirl81

That sucks, maybe have a chat to her calmly and explain that while you appreciate her concern and know that it is coming from a good place, that you think you have it under control and if you need advice you will let her know.

In regards to the Water thing..

She is actually correct. Water can a hard surface area, by adding something to it, it makes it "softer" hence easier to get down.... when you are early out, this makes a big difference on how it sits in your stomach... because when it is hard, it can be heavy on your new tummy

You can add lemon, water flavoring, cordial, etc to make it easier on your tummy.

Totally get that flavorings can help... I can't stand plain water and add flavoring... but I don't think it's because of pH changes. LOL. It's something someone said offhand and she misinterpreted, frankly.

I'm already pretty much over it, I just needed to rant instead of burying her head off. LOL

sent from mobile device

@@theantichick

Probably a good idea to vent here instead of strangling her lol

My dietitian actually suggested that we purchase alkaline PH Water prior to wls, she said it'll be a lifesaver once you have surgery.... i bought a couple of bottles and i sure could tell the difference between the alkaline and normal bottled water.... it.made such a difference for the first 2 weeks

@@theantichick

Glad you are out of surgery and on the other side now. Yeah, family can certainly get on your nerves. Glad you use this board to help you deal with it.

Don't let them get you down. You are doing fantastic already! Congratulations! And drink your liquids! (LOL)

@@theantichick

Probably a good idea to vent here instead of strangling her lol

My dietitian actually suggested that we purchase alkaline PH Water prior to wls, she said it'll be a lifesaver once you have surgery.... i bought a couple of bottles and i sure could tell the difference between the alkaline and normal bottled water.... it.made such a difference for the first 2 weeks

Well, the bicarb in alkaline water I can see might actually help, but that's opposite of what she's saying. She's saying that we need to put lemon juice in, which would make it more acidic. But with the flavorings she's advocating (Mio) which have zero lemon juice and only slight amounts of citric acid, there's not much chance of altering the pH significantly with the little squirt of it. Like I said, she hears stuff wrong and then it's the gospel in her brain and she has to share it. Drives my little internal nurse educator insane.

We don't have mio here.... i just looked it up... its just a bunch of preservatives... i personally wouldn't use it.

I have a relative similar to that who believes everything they hear in the media and takes it as fact.... frequently i get "advice" based on what they hear.

Eg. You can't eat veggies cause they cause cancer or you shouldn't go anywhere by plane because there are hijackers everywhere lol.. stupid stuff like that....

It is entertaining sometimes, but other times i just want to throw their media devices out a window lol

Edited August 22, 201610 yr by AussieGirl81

We don't have mio here.... i just looked it up... its just a bunch of preservatives... i personally wouldn't use it.

I have a relative similar to that who believes everything they hear in the media and takes it as fact.... frequently i get "advice" based on what they hear.

Eg. You can't eat veggies cause they cause cancer or you shouldn't go anywhere by plane because there are hijackers everywhere lol.. stupid stuff like that....

It is entertaining sometimes, but other times i just want to throw their media devices out a window lol

Yeah, there's nothing nutritionally valuable in Mio, but it does a good job of flavoring the Water. W.C. Fields and I have the same attitude about water - "never drink the stuff... fish f**k in it, you know?" I really do not like plain water. When I drink water without flavor it has to be bottled stuff with electrolytes - not because there's a significant amount, but because the potassium they use changes the flavor a bit. So a little bit of whatever crap is in Mio in order for me to drink the water I need to is a fair trade in my book. I like lemon because it doesn't taste like crap if the ice melts and it gets diluted, like some of the other flavors. So the even funnier part about all of this is, I'm already doing the stuff my sister claims has to be done (just not for the same reasons, because you know, science) but she still needs to make sure she tells me. (eye roll) whatever. LOL