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Alibi or Excuse

So I work from home and I'm looking forward to a Oct/Nov bypass surgery. I see my boss every 5-6 years (I'm lucky) and she is highly against any form of WLS unless it is liposuction. I had mentioned a couple months ago about needing some time off and when I told her she went off the deep end talking about how I just needed to take up smoking and drinking 5 cups of coffee a day, and how horrible the surgery would be (she is elderly). Anyways I need to come up with a reason why I'm taking 10-14 days off work (I can work from my recliner), I have plenty of vacation time to cover, she will ask what and where I'm doing and going and simply say that it is none of her business is not an option. Any ideas? And a European vacation would be way to expensive. Why do people got to be so closed minded ARGH!

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  • glitter eyes
    glitter eyes

    You can tell her you have to have a hiatal hernia repaired. Very similar recovery time and can give you a reason why you need to be on liquids for a few weeks. Also it is surgery some people have to h

  • As an independent contractor I don't get sick time, I work on a commission based pay plan, so my time off I don't get paid (no problem I have savings) but she also does not make money on me when I'm n

  • Or just tell her your taking the time for some much needed family time with no "real" plans, just spending time together.....I work from home as well. I took one week off when I had my sleeve surgery

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You could tell her you are having your gallbladder out, appendix or something like that.

Just incase (god forbid) you need extra time off, at least its somewhat close to the truth and you can get a doctors certificate noting you need additional time off.

You can tell her you have to have a hiatal hernia repaired. Very similar recovery time and can give you a reason why you need to be on liquids for a few weeks. Also it is surgery some people have to have done again so you are covered if it ever actually happens to you.!

Or just tell her your taking the time for some much needed family time with no "real" plans, just spending time together.....I work from home as well. I took one week off when I had my sleeve surgery.....it was fine but another week would have been perfect. I used the hiatal hernia excuse......it was true because I had that repaired at the same time.

Good luck to you!!!

Its not fair that you have to use your vacation time in lieu of sick leave (I assume you have a sick leave policy). Therefore, I would go with some other surgery. If you only spoke to her about the WLS two months ago, don't you think she'll be suspicious that you really are having WLS? Although if you only see her every few years, it shouldn't matter.

Its a tough position you are in. I didn't want to tell my boss but I had to because I wanted to take this extended sick leave. I have nearly 4 months accumulated and plan to retire next year. I'd like to dip into that a bit before taking my vacation days for what is a medical issue.

my boss knew I was having surgery (because I used sick leave), but I told other people I was taking a couple of weeks off to do some major house projects

I am pretty sure you do not have to disclose what surgery you are having at all to anyone. I believe it might even be illegal for her to ask and certainly for her to not give you the time that you have coming for this surgery.

Of course that assumes you live here in the US.

I would get something from your doctor that states you will be having a medical procedure and will require X time off of work during that period. I have had to do the same thing. They do not disclose what surgery you are having just that the time is required for recovery.

It is ridiculous that she is treating you this way, she has no right.

She probably doesn't realize she doesn't have a right to even ask you about what you are having done. Or maybe she does and treats people that way all the time.

Best of luck!

  • Author

As an independent contractor I don't get sick time, I work on a commission based pay plan, so my time off I don't get paid (no problem I have savings) but she also does not make money on me when I'm not working. I have been working for her for 8 years so the employee/ boss relationship is a big grey line. It is called vacation time and I get around 3 weeks per year. I don't think that she will suspect WLS if I come up with something believable. I think the Hiatal hernia or partial gastrectomy might be good, it is definitely more believable then a Canadian salmon fishing trip in November ( what my husband came up with ).

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Go with the Canadian salmon fishing trip and let her wonder. It is none of her business what you do with your time off. If she has hired you for 8 years of contract work and you do that from home, she won't fire you because you ask for some time off.

  • Author

There is the "Ad a fish" app....lol

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An intimate working relationship makes this hard and small employer makes this even harder.

I would go with hernia especially as you could need gal bladder out one day. Say you have had acid issues, had test doc recommends this quick, easy surgery. I can imagine that being vague will not be received well and it could be worth eliminating aggravation and angst to just give her a different story.

I agree with inner surfer girl you should not have to but sometimes it is easier.

If you decide to fess up you can always tell her you did both wls and hernia.

How old is "elderly?" Tread carefully, @Vipervixen. Quite a few of us here are true grown-ups.

The reason I see not to tell her -- beyond the fact that it's not her business -- that you're in fact having surgery (since you seem to have told her you're considering it) is that she'll be breathing down your neck, wanting to know how much you're losing and being gleeful if she hears that you've hit a stall or have any sort of difficulty or disappointment.

If you lie and speak of any other surgery, you'll have to remember. The "partial gastrectomy" will be true if you'll be doing sleeve, but she'll ask what it means and why. How about that you're just taking time to catch up on things that have been neglected because of work and there are some family responsibilities that need attention. She doesn't have to know that it'll be your husband looking after you.

I love the salmon-fishing trip and certainly would do it myself. Your boss, though, will want pictures.

I'm still blinking at her suggesting that you court lung cancer and smell like a dead thing.

Edited by WLSResources/ClothingExch

You don't have to tell her anything, it's none of her business. You need time off point blank period. Also for her information liposuction is not weight loss surgery. SMH.

  • Author

She is around 70-75 years old, when I ask for time off if and she asks why and I tell her that it is none of her biz would make things really awkward.

Thank You Everyone for the advice

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While it is none of her business, at her age and the working relationship that has been established, providing a vague reason might be the lesser of evils.

I do like WLSResources answer, you could also state that you are having an abdominal procedure that has been recommended by your provider due to failed response to other treatments options. She doesn't need to know that the abdominal surgery is WLS and the failed treatments is all previous attempts to lose weight.

This way it is vague and doesn't potentially create an uncomfortable work environment if she finds out down the road it was WLS. It also eliminates the need to remember a lie.

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