Before I start, let me say that my husband has been wonderfully supportive in this entire process.. But he also doesn't really understand my desire for privacy.

I agreed to tell his parents because I knew they'd be supportive and it seemed like the right thing to do. (I've only told them, a couple friends, my boss, our kids and my brothers) I've been stressed the past few days trying to figure out how I'm going to handle Christmas. My all-liquid pre-op diet starts on the 23rd. We always do Christmas Day at my in-laws house. Usually, it's not a huge meal. I intend just to take a Protein shake and some broth with protein in it for the time over there. I've been a little stressed about it because I don't want to have to be answering a bunch of questions from nosy nieces and nephews (not inquisitive - nosy!). But, I'll figure it out.

So, my hubby, in his "i must tell my mother everything" mode, tells his mom that I'm anxious. Her solution is to volunteer to tell my sisters-in-law but tell them that I want it kept quiet. Now I love my sisters-in-law. But one of them is completely incapable of not spilling the Beans. I don't want to talk to them about it. I don't even want them to know about it. It's personal and private.

I told my husband that I didn't want his mom to say anything to anyone. He said "well, then we just won't be able to go to Christmas". I told him that was ridiculous and if anyone asked why I wasn't eating, I'd just say I don't feel good. Now he's all upset.

I am irritated beyond belief! I'm supposed to let his mom tell blabbermouth so that she and my husband feel ok about it. HELL NO!!

I haven't figure out yet what containers I'm going to take with my protein in it but I'll figure it out.

Sorry for venting. I'm nervous and anxious and everybody is getting on my last nerve!

This. Just this.

My husband and best(only friend) are the only ones I even told about looking into bariatric surgery( waiting to see about insurance and how much a consult will be) they were both SOOOO VERY UNSUPPORTIVE.....but he tells EVERYONE. It's not his damn business to share!!! "Well they will know something is up if it does happen" ect well that's MY PLACE to deal with not yours!!

So I come here to talk because nobody else is nice about it

This. Just this.

My husband and best(only friend) are the only ones I even told about looking into bariatric surgery( waiting to see about insurance and how much a consult will be) they were both SOOOO VERY UNSUPPORTIVE.....but he tells EVERYONE. It's not his damn business to share!!! "Well they will know something is up if it does happen" ect well that's MY PLACE to deal with not yours!!

So I come here to talk because nobody else is nice about it

What I don't understand is what part of "i'm having my guts torn up and rearranged and it's private!" do they not understand?

Hey put your protein drink in a fireball whiskey bottle and tell them you are not eating so you can get drunk faster- that should blow their minds. LOL.

All joking aside, that is a frustrating situation. Like you said the easiest thing to tell people is you are just drinking broth and shakes because you haven't been feeling well.

Seems like they are trying to make it a big deal. Hang in there it will all be worth it!!

If you are okay with people knowing that you are trying to lose wt (not have surgery but just lose wt) you could just tell them that you are dieting and broth and shakes are on your diet, and that its important to you and you are committed to losing weight.

But no, it is not his business to tell and if you don't want certain people to know he should respect that. I had a similar issue going into surgery, my mom likes to talk to people about me, tell them my life story really... i suppose its because she is proud of me but i'm pretty modest and it makes me uncomfortable when she tells people stuff about me. So anyway, I was sure that she would tell everyone, so I had to have a serious discussion with her that I wasn't ready to let the whole world know and asked she didn't tell anyone unless I said it was okay. She honestly has done a pretty good job, better than I expected but she did tell my aunt which I was okay with as she is very supportive. I've found that the further out from surgery I get the less I care that people know. There are quite a few people now that know and everyone has been supportive, but I completely understanding why you are uncomfortable, you should be able to tell people when you are ready.

In the longer scheme of things, as time goes on you will become more capable of dealing with the holidays. Your food volume will go up and you will feel less like it is a burden and appreciate the marvelous changes that are taking place due to the lost weight.

If anyone asks why you aren't eating, just say your stomach is bothering you. If they are persistent to find out more details, tell them you had explosive diarrhea; that'll stop them from asking any further questions about why you aren't eating.

If anyone asks why you aren't eating, just say your stomach is bothering you. If they are persistent to find out more details, tell them you had explosive diarrhea; that'll stop them from asking any further questions about why you aren't eating.

I can just see their faces now!