someone asked me why i chose to do this procedure and i might as well say the many reasons why i decided this path for myself... mind everyone i suffer from ankylosing spondylitis.. really bad arthritis in my lower back that affects my joints in my arms and legs to swell and is very painful and fibromyalgia.. also a rsd. which i have 2 herniated disk in my lower back that hit a nerve in my back...

ive have always been a lil over weight not too crazy or anything... the most ive ever weighted before i made this decision was 220. and thats because i was first pregnant with my first baby girl in '08.. then i was 180 for the longest and didnt have any problem. then in '11 i gained alot of weight from my son. then i lost a little weight and was 210... then i went off from there. i had my 2nd daughter in sept '13 lost some weight then a year after in december i got really physically disabled... it was very hard for me to work but i tried hard to pull it off but couldnt anymore in mar '14. i could barely walk or anything... so i was stuck sitting alot. even sitting or moving was painful. i gained weight from sitting so much. then my grandfather passed which put me into a depression. and i gained weight from that. and the medicine i take i gained weight from. so about march april this year i made the decision of wanting to have the suregery. i know i cant do it on my own with all my medical problems to lose the weight. so ive talked to my rheumatologist, pcp, and endocrinologist and they believed this would be good for me. and all the research ive done ive made up my mind to want to do it. i have support from my husband and family. but its not the same when they dont know what its like to go through it... my family suffer from hypertension and diabetes.. i dont have it but if i keep going the way i do i would have it anytime soon...

nobody really knows on here how much i weigh bc im so ashamed of it.... but im 270 now. ive lost 8lbs in almost 3 weeks. but its like i look on the scale and i look one day its lower then the next it seems to go up a little and i dont feel right about that.

another thing is my medicine that i take just to be able to move and do stuff again is killing my immune system so i get sick very easily now.. which its hard w 3 lil ones that are all over the place lol... and im more prone to cancer now.. which ive had a few members of my family had it at an older age but i dont want to die or be sick anymore...

Welcome and I wish you well on your journey. I wrote down my experiences with gastric bypass surgery. The article is available through this link. http://www.breadandbutterscience.com/Surgery.pdf

I also wrote an article that covers the period after the "Weight Loss Phase" after I transitioned into the "Maintenance Phase", which you can find here.

http://www.breadandbutterscience.com/Surgery2.pdf

For a few months (mostly during late nights) I would read, read, read about WLS. I feverishly read any material I could run my eyes by or get in my hands. It all started when I went to a PCP appointment and for the first time in YEARS looked at the scale when they weighed me. I saw that number and instantly felt a lump in my throat and it felt like the world fell out from underneath me.

It was a number that didn't register when I looked in the mirror or when I tried on clothes or when I hurt with every step I took. That number was a number I couldn't wrap my mind around as being that size meant I wasn't just "chubby" or "thick" or "curvy" but MORBIDLY OBESE.

Then it hit me hard and clicked in my brain that everything I was dealing with emotionally, physically and mentally was related to how heavy I had grown in just over two years. Yes, a lot happened in those two years but I have been "heavy" my entire life and was officially that girl I never thought I'd be. Obese. Miserable. Anxious. Sad. Unhealthy and Insecure.

I knew my only hope was drastic measures. I didn't know that those measures would be until I started researching my options, talking to my doctors, going to OA meetings and reflecting on what my weight loss goals needed to be.

And while I have a list a mile long as to why I had surgery, when ever anyone asks, I simply reply "because I want to."

Be proud that you know there needs to be a change. Be satisfied with yourself that you have the realization to make those changes. Be excited about the future and the endless possibilities that awaits. Be comforted in knowing you are not alone. And most importantly be patient with yourself as this road as a WLS patient is curvy, loopy, bumpy, rough and exciting.