Ugh.... I was told tonight...again... that I would be beautiful if I was smaller... by family no doubt!! Do people not realize that I know I'm fat? I do dress and bathe myself. I've seen the jelly rolls in action lol. I hate people putting stipulations on comments.:/ I can not (NOT NOT NOT!!!!!)wait to look on the outside how I do on the inside. I want to ride a roller coaster with my kids and not feel like everyone in the room is staring a hole thru me every bite I take. I am so done with being a chunky monkey????

Some people don't realize the impact words make. I had an uncle say wow you were always the pretty one but boy you have let yourself go. I look at him and held back my emotions and said thank you for your words.

Is it not ridiculous! I don't go up to people and say omg u could be a model if u didn't have that hairy mole! Or omg u would be handsome if one eye wasn't bigger than the other. Rude people suck ????

This has been my story my entire life.
The worst thing anyone ever said to me? An ex said
"If you were skinny, you'd be too pretty for me."
Implying that because I'm fat, I'm worthy of him, which makes

me less important than a "skinny" person.
He also said, if I were skinny I would no doubt be a model.
SO many people have told me that, and it just makes me feel horrible.

And ever notice how people are always like
"Oh my gosh, you have such a gorgeous face!"

and they never look at your body. Just your face.
That hurts.

Hi I think people think they are giving you a compliment or something , I was told your so beautiful to be a BBW I said WTF that's not a compliment , then I when the weight began falling off I had all types of men hitting on me , my thought was this if I wasn't good enough then your not good enough for me now .

I think every bigger person has dealt with this in some form or another. It is sad that people speak before they think, but such is life. What gets me the most is the same people come back when the weight it gone and are "blown away" but how great you look. That is what burns me the most.

There's another side to this too, I think. I had a co-worker come to me just yesterday rather timidly, saying she wasn't sure how to say it or if she even should, but she thought I'd looked like I lost weight & wanted to compliment me, but thought she might embarrass me. Granted, when I do get compliments, I've realized that I have to learn how to accept them- I'm not someone who's used to being the center of attention, and when I am, I shuffle my feet and am not sure of what to say other than a mumbled, "Thanks."

Now, some people do open their yaps before their brain is switched to the "on" position, but there are folks out there too who want to compliment us, but aren't sure how. And it's not necessarily an unintentional slam that we looked like crap before...but they really care about us & are proud of us. Sometimes it just comes out wrong.

You're right Suze. Some people definitely don't know how to
word things properly even though they mean nothing but nice.
But, some of the times, people are actually wording to be hurtful,
and when that happens, I'm sure you know as well as I do that
that sort of thing lingers, and sometimes leads to things like
stress eating. :/

A lot of these people are related to me unfortunately :/ they mean it in a constructive criticism kinda way.... that's how they say it anyway. My aunt u

Is the worst about it. One of her favorite things to say, Mallory you were a beautiful child! Just darling... what happened to u dear? My answer.. I got fat? She says well dear you really need to work on that if you want your husband to stick it out with u...WTH?!?!?!? I avoid that woman at all costs ????

Now that my surgery is getting closer and more real, the bottled up resentment for that tipe of bullying is really ovewhelming...

I don't think they see It as bullying. I really think they believe that we enjoy being this way or something