I'll start off by saying, I am a nurse and I obviously work with nurses. Nurses are really judgmental at times, especially to one of their own. It just in most of our natures to have the "suck it up buttercup and quit feeling sorry for yourself. You did this to yourself" attitude. Anyway, for this reason I was trying not to tell anyone other than one close friend/coworker and my nurse manager. Well my nurse manager forced my hand, for reasons I won't bore you with, and I felt the need to own my situation and tell my unit. It's a small 13 person unit and we love/bicker like sisters. Most have been supportive but some keep saying "you're not that big", "you don't have that much to lose, you shouldn't need it". Well let me tell ya ladies, if it was that easy I would have done it when I was 13 and battling it, or all of the other failed attempts, most of which involved weight loss meds. I know I'm "only" 190, but when I have 70lbs to lose it is a lot to me. My joints are wearing from the weight due to my rheumatoid arthritis and I am in a lot of pain. They don't see it because I don't broadcast it. They don't see me fret over my LDL of 186. I just don't need people being flippant and judgmental right now. It was a very difficult decision and I feeling a bit vulnerable.

most ppl just don't understand that dieting doesn't help with us. we have tried and tried. they see the biggest loser and other wlshows and say why don't you just do that? like i'm going to go out and turn a semi-tractor tire over and over again. our health issues prohibits us from being a normal dieter. I have taken a I just don't care what you may think of me attitude. the ppl that count knows how hard I tried before surgery and are my biggest supporters so therefore my ppl. I wish you the best as you deal with this.

I love the way you described nurses. I've been one for 22 years and I totally get it. You do become very close. Almost too close. As for having to tell your manager, your HR was wrong. As for your name being on the surgery schedule, it didn't have to be. You were a pt and you had the right to confidentiality. Your friends mean well I'm sure. They have gotten comfortable in the unit just the way it is and you are threatening to change it, even if its just you youre changing. They will come around and become supportive as you show progress. But, remember, they are women, and they will also gossip. I guess that has helped me to stay on track, some of my coworkers anticipation of my failure. They don't do it on purpose, its just their nature.