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Bariatricpal scared me shitless

I was 100% sure about the gastric sleeve until I read some of the posts on this site. Now I'm scared shitless and I'm meeting with the surgeon in 3 days. Anyone else back out after reading some threads here???

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I am there with you, OP. The more I read, the scarier it gets. I keep asking myself why I cannot simply go on now to live on the 1200 calorie diabetic exchange diet, given that I have managed to live on the bariatric one of 700-900 calories for 11 months now.

When I hear that I may never again have diet sodas or mineral waters, steak, or Pasta (which I have missed for the past 11 months), it worries me that the post surgical diet is boring, and basically unhealthy. I was told that I would need to take a multi-vitamin twice a day for life, NOW I read that after five years 1/4 to 1/2 of gastric sleeve patients are Vitamin or Iron deficient five years post surgery and the vitamin requirements/regimen for life is much more intense.

I am not as concerned about the low post surgical risks, those can be managed. I am concerned about never being able to eat a fresh salad with all the vibrous veggies I like, or the possibility that steak will become problematic.

Just as I was taught that eating limited foods from all four food groups is unhealthy, so, too, must it be to have a lifetime limit on what foods you can eat. Exercise is important, but try working up a sweat and then having to limit your Water intake to four ounces and wait to eat an additional half hour to 45 minutes.

There are so many cheerleaders on this site, but I think a lot of the posters are probably not being honest about the downsides to these procedures or are on a post surgical high. I have noticed that most of the posts I read are from people 1 year or a couple of years or less out of surgery.

Where are the long timers? Where are those who regret having done this procedure? Yes, I am being a downer here but the reason is that I believe strongly that there are TWO SIDES to every issue and I am naturally suspicious of anything that is covered solely from the happy, happy crowd.

I have lost 164 pounds on the bariatric diet in just 11 months now. Why can't I just continue this diet and then stick to a 1200 or 1500 one (twice my current food level) for life rather than go through with the sleeve surgery that is currently set to go through on 9/29.

Scared? You betcha I am.

  • Author

I am there with you, OP. The more I read, the scarier it gets. I keep asking myself why I cannot simply go on now to live on the 1200 calorie diabetic exchange diet, given that I have managed to live on the bariatric one of 700-900 calories for 11 months now. When I hear that I may never again have diet sodas or mineral waters, steak, or pasta (which I have missed for the past 11 months), it worries me that the post surgical diet is boring, and basically unhealthy. I was told that I would need to take a multi-vitamin twice a day for life, NOW I read that after five years 1/4 to 1/2 of gastric sleeve patients are vitamin or iron deficient five years post surgery and the vitamin requirements/regimen for life is much more intense. I am not as concerned about the low post surgical risks, those can be managed. I am concerned about never being able to eat a fresh salad with all the vibrous veggies I like, or the possibility that steak will become problematic. Just as I was taught that eating limited foods from all four food groups is unhealthy, so, too, must it be to have a lifetime limit on what foods you can eat. Exercise is important, but try working up a sweat and then having to limit your water intake to four ounces and wait to eat an additional half hour to 45 minutes. There are so many cheerleaders on this site, but I think a lot of the posters are probably not being honest about the downsides to these procedures or are on a post surgical high. I have noticed that most of the posts I read are from people 1 year or a couple of years or less out of surgery. Where are the long timers? Where are those who regret having done this procedure? Yes, I am being a downer here but the reason is that I believe strongly that there are TWO SIDES to every issue and I am naturally suspicious of anything that is covered solely from the happy, happy crowd. I have lost 164 pounds on the bariatric diet in just 11 months now. Why can't I just continue this diet and then stick to a 1200 or 1500 one (twice my current food level) for life rather than go through with the sleeve surgery that is currently set to go through on 9/29. Scared? You betcha I am.

I've had a lot of those same thoughts. Thank you for posting I am glad I'm not alone.

I can say that I am only one month out and I am eating all kinds of normal foods with no problems. It is true that you do have to take Vitamins from here on out, but that is a small price to pay for your health. I have a friend that is 7 months out and eats anything and everything; steak, vegetables, Candy, etc. with no negative effects. I know quite a few people personally that have had the sleeve and the bypass and they all eat what they please just in smaller portions.

With that being said, you will always find a few people with something negative to say. The reason you find so many positive people on here is because they all had good experiences. If your looking for something negative than that is exactly what your going to get. Pain is to be expected, frustration is common, and yes you have to learn to eat all over again. The first couple months are the hardest.

The reason you don't find a lot of old timers on here is because the sleeve is fairly new in a lot of places. It wasn't even offered 5-6 yrs ago in a lot of offices, so most went the the bypass. If bypass patients are fine then the sleeve patients will be okay. Sleeve patients still have a stomach to digest and better absorb nutrients...bypass patients do not. I personally know 6 bypass patients that range from 5-10yrs out and none of them suffer from malnutrition.

Congratulations on your weight loss so far and if the diet is working for you then stick with it. You do have a choice in having the surgery. The surgery is not for everybody.

We have no reason to lie to you guys. We had good experiences and don't regret our decision at all. Don't worry so much...it's going to be okay.

I haven't read all the posts but honestly don't get scared. I have diabetes type 1, fibro and other issues and got it done. Honestly I'm amazed that it wasn't painful. My gallbladder was 10xs worse for me. And about throwing up and etc. Only once because I ate too much. Besides that I'm eating everything normal and etc. Everyone has A diff story and their body is diff.

I'm more scared of dying the way I am. Especially after seeing my blood work up that my surgeons office did. It's time!

No one has to have the surgery. Everyone must do their own due diligence and make their own decision that's right for them. Personally, I think the surgery is NOT right for everyone!

If you feel like it isn't right for you, then you should definitely not get it.

I want to reassure you with out deceiving you in any way. Yes, there are complications, and YES they can be serious but get online and read reviews of your doctor provided by previous patients. The more recent the better, variable change and it is possible for a lackluster doctor to improve practice and it is possible for a good doctor to slack off.

Choosing a good doctor and hospital removes many risks. Still, be aware - it's surgery. It's hard. It has never, ever been easy. Harder than seeing my life fly by as I struggled under an extra 100 lbs? NO. I have to work at it. I have to keep my emotions out of my kitchen and me out of my kitchen when I am having issues.

However, I am in remission fro type 2 diabetes, and I am 100 lbs lighter +/-, it varies. I teach yoga. I swim, dance, climb and crawl (I have bunnies).

Don't let fear decide this, but allow caution help you proceed.

Good luck.

I want to put this as delicately as possible..Nothing in life is guaranteed. You could drop dead of a heart attack tomorrow. You could walk out your door three days from now and never walk back in. These things can happen and do, to some people. But the majority of us do not have any such thing happen in our lives. It is the same with surgery. I understand your fear, seriously. I'm a single mother of a 5 year old girl. ( she was 4 at the time of my surgery) I had my fear and "what ifs". I went into surgery as prepared as I could be. I made my will and living will out. I had all my affairs in order, just in case. I have had two pulmonary embolism(s) since 2011 so I was high risk going into surgery. And as you can tell I am here today to write this to you. I had no complications, I had no problems. While everyone has their own road and journey to go through, please do not allow fear of the unknown cloud your reasoning. I can say this, it will change your life. You will feel so much better and be able to be a better mom for your children once the weight is gone. I wish you peace in your decision and hope you choose what works best for you!!! Good luck!

  • Author

I want to put this as delicately as possible..Nothing in life is guaranteed. You could drop dead of a heart attack tomorrow. You could walk out your door three days from now and never walk back in. These things can happen and do, to some people. But the majority of us do not have any such thing happen in our lives. It is the same with surgery. I understand your fear, seriously. I'm a single mother of a 5 year old girl. ( she was 4 at the time of my surgery) I had my fear and "what ifs". I went into surgery as prepared as I could be. I made my will and living will out. I had all my affairs in order, just in case. I have had two pulmonary embolism(s) since 2011 so I was high risk going into surgery. And as you can tell I am here today to write this to you. I had no complications, I had no problems. While everyone has their own road and journey to go through, please do not allow fear of the unknown cloud your reasoning. I can say this, it will change your life. You will feel so much better and be able to be a better mom for your children once the weight is gone. I wish you peace in your decision and hope you choose what works best for you!!! Good luck!

This made me cry. Thank you so much for the uplifting words.

When I started my journey earlier this year, I wanted to know as much as about the procedure even before I had my first consultation. At first I focused on the more positive youtube videos, posts here, and other information sources. How much weight people lost, how much better they felt, the positive impact on their lives.

However, with the complete inundation of U.S. advertising these days with pharmaceuticals, I really didn't want to have the "pop-a-pill" mentality that the pharmaceutical industry throws at us now: If you have any problem, just pop-a-pill...it will be all better. No. I didn't want to look at the surgery as a quick-fix like getting a haircut. This is major surgery.

So I made a point to learn about the negative experiences: complications, weight gain, recovery pain, regrets, etc. I also wanted to know where the surgery failed to help people and why.

I felt that if I went into the surgery with rose-tinted glasses, I may have been blindsided if I experienced any of the negatives. I also felt that if I wasn't understanding the surgery as a tool, I would've been relying on the surgery to do the work. Once I became well-versed in the surgery, I knew as much as I could going in. Aside from actually performing the surgery, of course. Though I did watch the youtube vids of the actual procedure. I was just too into it I guess. ;)

Edited by AlwaysVegas

I'd suggest staying out of the complications forum 2-3 weeks before surgery - and avoiding the forums completely for a week pre-op. You'll notice that most everyone that has had a very positive experience falls off the forums after a couple of months ( everyone must love their new post-op life :) ) I've had exactly zero complications, follow your dr's orders to the t and you'll be great!

Your suggestion sounds like cheer leading to me. For any surgical procedure, especially one that alters your body permanently, it is very important to be educated on all the ways that having this surgery might impact you. While not everyone gets a complication, many people want to hear both sides of the story before they make a decision.

How can anyone make a decision with only one side/angle to the story. The fact that a thread about complications exists and there are multiple posts to it is proof enough that this surgery has had a downside for many. I do not believe in blinders.

My own surgery is still scheduled for this month, and I begin my liver reduction diet on the 8th. I still am ambivalent about it but know that if all goes well for me, this could change my life for the better. That is why I have not postponed it.

First of all I don't consider myself morbidly obese...lol. And yes when I make the decision I will be ready.

I didn't consider myself "morbidly obese" either....... Doctors did. I had no clue, I thought that I was just "over weight" nevertheless the decision is totally your own.

@@keepingmysecrets

Your suggestion sounds like cheer leading to me. For any surgical procedure, especially one that alters your body permanently, it is very important to be educated on all the ways that having this surgery might impact you. While not everyone gets a complication, many people want to hear both sides of the story before they make a decision. How can anyone make a decision with only one side/angle to the story. The fact that a thread about complications exists and there are multiple posts to it is proof enough that this surgery has had a downside for many. I do not believe in blinders. My own surgery is still scheduled for this month, and I begin my liver reduction diet on the 8th. I still am ambivalent about it but know that if all goes well for me, this could change my life for the better. That is why I have not postponed it.

You REALLY DON'T have to go through such a drastic life changing, organ altering experience for yourself. BP is not the only forum to get the information good or bad, that you're seeking. I'm sure there are actual support groups at the facility that you've sought out where you can meet face to face with people who've had various bariatric surgeries and can tell you face to face their own personal experience. There's also Google and YouTube with great information. This decision will be your own personal journey and like everyone else, you too will have your own story to tell whether you decide to go for it or not. Best of luck.

Edited by waitingtoexhale

I think these are all valid points and concerns. I take comfort in the support group I attend where there are pre ops like me as well as people 4 years out. We have plenty of time for swapping stories so I feel comfortable with that. Also my surgeon's nurse is one of his 4 year vets. She meets with us and exchanges emails, answering all questions and she is very up front about her experiences. She has turkey, dressing, and pie at Thanksgiving but in small servings. I saw my mom die a slow death from morbid obesity. I have faced that I lack the skills or qualities or strength or whatever it is to lose this weight on my own. I'd prefer not to have surgery. But I am more afraid if facing what happened to my mom. Morbid obesity will kill me so I have made this choice. God bless you all, whichever path you choose.

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