So I told my boss this morning that I am planning on bariatric surgery and that date will be in October or November. I don't have a date yet. She asked me to wait until December since it's elective. I really don't want to wait until the holidays dang it. I want this done ASAP. Not wait a month and half after my last dr appt. tempted to just hit fmla up and do it sooner anyways since they can't stop fmla. But is it worth it to piss off my boss? I work for a large hospital and the October/November months are our inspection window this year. What do you all think? Should I discuss this with the HR dept?

I'm self-employed so I'm not totally qualified to answer this question. But I think a lot of it depends on your priorities - there's nothing wrong with putting yourself first - You are the only one who can do this for yourself. But there's also nothing wrong with putting it off til December if you think that your work is important and you feel that's the way to go.

So... go with your gut. What would you be proud to tell your mom you did?

Taking the high road and doing you think is right is worth it in the long run.

sorry - I hope that didn't come across as preachy. I once worked for some really unethical sh*theads (shockingly morally bankrupt individuals), so work-place ethics are a passion of mine.

I just don't like others who do not know employee rights or try to push there view. It's more a principle thing. Large employers have no right to tell someone to delay a surgery even if it's voluntary when some one files FMLA or even if they think the employee is going to file. It becomes hands off. I was not asked to delay. I was told to delay.

I never would've told my employer why or what about any surgery whether I work at a hospital or not. It's the Hippa act for a reason and they too are not omitted from abiding by your personal medical records and using them against you shame on them. What if it's more to your surgery than meets the eye? What if it was them? No there's nothing wrong with waiting for December if that's what YOU choose, but, what if you don't? Will you be reprehended for that? FMLA is for your use of ANY medical condition that requires time off 2-3 days or more with visits or overnight stays to a hospital. Obesity is a medical condition that if not treated, can lead to other medical conditions. The sooner treated, the better. I didn't and never will tell my employer. My career job is with the government and they could care less about your health they just want you there, at work. Good luck.

I'd stick with your schedule and use fmla. As for the surgery being elective, if your insurance company is covering it, it's not elective which your boss may not be aware of. It's a matter of your health, not a convenience (for you or your employer). Also, I'd worry that if you push it off until December, you'll be asked to push it off again until after the first of the year and so on and so on. Too much time between all your pre-op testing and the actual surgery could cause scheduling issues and the need to re-do somehting. Additionally, I wouldn't want to be dealing with recovery during the holidays either. If you do the surgery in October, you'll be much more prepared by the holidays to handle the food issues that "WILL" come up. Better to be used to what you can and can't handle. Stick to your plan if at all possible.

I'm sorry- when you wrote "asked to delay" I guess I assumed that it wasn't a demand, just a request you could refuse. It's totally wrong of them to demand that you work. Take fmla leave!