Friday I went to the hospital for the bulk of my remaining preop testing. I came out 4 hrs later a blubbering mess.

First I had a gallbladder ultrasound. No problem there.

Then I needed to have a blood gas done, and they take the blood out of your artery. It took them four tries in two different places to find one on me, and the very first one they did, in my wrist, went so close to a nerve that I literally screamed and almost passed out from the pain. Understand that I am a type 1 diabetic for over 20 years, and am very used to being pricked, and very very good at not moving, and I never scream. The woman finally asked another technician to try, and he got it after two more tries (but he didn't hurt).

Then I had to have (I don't remember the exact term) an ultrasound of the veins in my legs to check for clots. I have had this test twice before, and it is uncomfortable for me, but this time? There was a rookie doing the exam on me, and he couldn't handle holding the thingee in the right place on my leg plus looking at the screen to see the picture plus typing with his other hand all at the same time, and therefore he pressed REALLY REALLY HARD into my leg to kind of stick it there so it wouldn't move while he took his time doing everything else. OMG. I was crying by the time he finished my first leg, and almost passed out again (this is SO NOT LIKE ME) in the middle of the second leg, so he finally called someone else in to finish. No problem with her, no pain. OMG I could barely walk out of there.

Luckily my sweetheart had dropped me off and picked me up, because I was in no shape to drive, plus all the stress caused my blood sugar to skyrocket and stay there. So I spent the rest of Friday in bed sleeping off the horror of the morning.

Saturday I was kind of hung over from blood sugars over 300 all day Friday, and had little energy, but I was feeling better. Until I said something that hit my sweetheart the wrong way.

Sunday he moved out.

I'm devastated, we've been together for over a year and I thought this was my future. I'm finding it hard to find the courage to go through the surgery alone. I know I WILL... I will do this for me, and get healthy, and instead of frolicking forever with him, I will find someone new to frolic with eventually... but I'm so so very sad and trying not to think about recovering alone. I don't even know who will drive me home from the hospital now. And that's the least of my thoughts, the surgery... this literally knocked the wind right out of me. I made it to work today, but watching him pack up and leave yesterday was the hardest thing I've ever done.

Thanks for letting me vent. Onward ho.

So sorry to hear that. Don't let that deter you from what u have set out to do. Keep moving forward. Everything will work itself out.

Oh Lord! First of all, you need to let that place know about your painful experiences! Granted some procedures are just painful no matter who does them, but when you experience pain because of someone's inexperience, that is plain unacceptable! No need to be ugly but you can suggest that some additional training is in order!

And he moved out??? What a kick in the gut. I am so sorry. But you are right to keep going forward. This is for YOU! I also don't know how I will be getting to and fro and I will recover alone. But lots of others have done it and so will we!

God bless you, dear. What you are doing takes courage. You will make it.

I'm very happy to say that my guy and I have worked it out and he is back home with me again after one night away. Thank you for your good wishes.

Stress brings out the best in all of us, doesn't it?