Have a question for all of you, How do you approach someone, nicely, they need to loose weight? Or even better, How could someone approach you that you have gained weight? This could possibly be related or even unrelated to WLS surgery.

I am asking this because, apparently, most if us are upset that someone mentions to us that we or a person have gained weight. Could it possibly be that we might care about this person, and do not want them to have the health issues which go along with weight gain. So we try to say something, yet when we say something they are hurt and eat to sooth themselves?

I've noticed that many of us do not like to hear that we have gained weight. So how does one approach us, without us being offended?

What I weigh and what I choose to do about it is my business not yours. Well intentioned friends have tried in the past it comes off offensive and cruel and non supportive These are the same friends who tell you eat less excercise more.

Don't take the easy way out blah blah

Edited June 9, 201412 yr by Jersrose43

Wow. Interesting answers. Thank you to all.

I'd love to respond to each and everyone, but I will make a blanket response.

I find it interesting that most would not want anyone to say anything to them. I do like the response about the smokers cough too.

See, I noticed reading the threads before posting this, it always seems that no one wants to hear they are heavy. Or it's obvious that they are heavy and no one should comment.

I have mixed feelings on it.

Yes. I have lost weight. But even when I was at my heaviest, none of my do tors ever mentioned to me about loosing weight. None. Now I do not put any blame on them. Though some of the health issues I had, they should have.

I don't know whether something should be said or not. But at times I believe something should be mentioned especially when it might effect someone's health. Or if I notice my kids making too many carb choices.

For instance, if I notice my kid eating Mac n cheese for lunch and want some bread, I'd say you've already had some carbs, choose a veggie, fruit or Protein.

I don't know the answer, but I believe being forever silent isn't good either.

Again, thanks for all the responses!!