I just found out this past Tuesday that my surgery is scheduled for May 8th, a mere 4 weeks away and all of a sudden out of nowhere KABOOM, I am having meltdown. I think what's happening is its been such a long time in pre-op band land -- since Sept. 06 -- and rather than continue to complain and/or think out it, I suprisingly, spent this time acknowingly and really working on, for the first time in my life, my "food" issues. I have slowly begun to change my behaviors -- I detoxed off of refined carbs. (which hands down has been the number one hardest, yet by far the most important thing I did -- I just don't crave them anymore in the same way) addressing my inactive lifestlye and most importantly saying yes to life more than I say no.

In January 07, I changed my diet completely and have lost 30 lbs so far, I have never felt better in my life, my head is clear, I have alot of energy, I don't have any real physical hunger, bloodwork is great, blood pressure is fine, I feel really healthy, balanced and centered, yah da, yah da, yah da --other than I'm still carrying around an extra 80 lbs. on my 5'3 frame. My dream would be to continue what I'm doing and to lose another 80 pounds total. Its exciting to see the changes in myself on a day to day basis -- it ain't all been easy, but I am certainly having way more good days than bad and I'm taking it one day at a time. The changes in me and the power I am finding in taking control of my life and not simply reaching for -- albeit still thinking somewhat -- about food are so very new and exciting. Sometimes, I find myself weeping tears of joy silently to myself and often telling myself how proud I am -- everday I hold my head just a bit higher. I have only shared my surgery plan with about four people and that was probably out of necessity more than anything else. I've come to recoginze its ultimately not about the food for me its about finding other ways to nourish myself and recognizing my own strength, courage and wisdom.

So what's the problem -- I am really kind of angry that all of a sudden I am second guessing myself about having this procedure, as all the what if's are creeping in louder and louder -- are you compromising your health; is it worth the risk; are you giving to much power to a "band"; why can't you take simply take back your power and just plain do it by yourself; etc., etc. etc., I can't turn off all the mental noise. My concern is if I'm starting to feel this way presurgery with good nutrition no less am I going be utterly depressed post surgery with little to no nutrients to keep my mood in check? (oh and did I mention I never had and major illness or surgery before? I know that's gotta be playing a role in this too).

Bottom line, while I know it will ultimately be my decision, I wonder did anyone else find themselves in a presurgury panic?? Oh wise group --

care to chime and reassure me that this too is "normal" (or not).

I know deep down its now or never for me -- :think

This is totally "NORMAL". I had a mass freakout right before my surgery. I am 36, no co-morbidities, why am I doing this to myself??!! I also felt good losing some weight on the pre-op diet and started to think..."maybe I can do this on my own". Then I remembered all the times I had lost 70 pounds and gained it all back and then some. The band has finally given me the hope of KEEPING IT OFF. It was an emotional rollercoaster for me (still is). But seeing the scale go down or stay the same is way better than it creeping up again! You can do it! Hang in there! The best is yet to come.

Don't melt hun...that is going to happen soon enough. Honestly you are starting the journey to a new healthier you. Embrace it. Don't be scared, well be scared, but come into it with a healthy...dang I am really going to do this attitude. I say you go girl...good for you..you are going to be great, look great and feel great. Just wait and see, awesome job....keep you chin up. Happy Easter

POPT

Just the beginning to a great new end!!

I'm gonna differ with the group..... Although I am tickled to have my lap band, and I know I couldn't do it without it, you know you can always make up a darned fine excuse to have the surgery put off....death in the family or sick aunt or whatever, and keep doing it on your own until you are convinced one way or the other...... Who knows. Maybe in another few months you'll have lost more and feel good about it, or you'll know that you need the help.

I will say this...if you get the lap band now while you are on a roll, you'll be in the right frame of mind to succeed with it,adding it to the arsenal you already have.

I was also in a panic before the surgery but that quickly went away. Of course the way you are going I am sure you can probably get it all of. If you get the band you will basically keep doing what you are doing but the band will make it easier. The band definitely does not have the power, you do!! As my doctor told me the band will make the bahavior changes effective, the band doesn't do it alone but it helps alot.

Without the band you run the risk of being among 96% of weightloss people who gain it all back and then some. I know as I have doen it many times. This time I know it will stay off but I still have to work at it.. But if you are really totally anxious I would talk to the doctor and maybe think of the fact that you can postpone it..

Like others.. what your feeling is completey normal!!! It took me a long time to get here emotionaly because I fought it... I thought.. I SHOULD be able to do this on my own, but alas.. I now know that the band will be my TOOL, MY BACKUP to the part of my head that "knows better" when I make bad choices.... (like eating an entire pizza) Go check out a Thread called Bandversary by BOO... there are a lot of bandsters that are a year out and have posted their reflections.......... it has helped me immensley.

Calm down, take a deep breath, and take a drink of that Water....... you are on your way to Bandland!

Ditto what everyone else has said.

Being a self pay,,I started asking myself if it was really gonna be worth the $16,500,,,,it would be cheaper to make up my mind to lose it by myslef,,,RIGHTTTTTTTTTTTT,,,like THAT was gonna happen! That "fight or flight" panic is normal. The day before surgery,,I settled down and was very calm. It's been a little over 2 months since my surgery and I havent questioned my decision once.

Banded 1/29/07

Dr Ken Cleveland-CMMC-Jackson, MS

331/298/150

no fill to date

amazingly, I am calming myself down and trying to remember its just a tool !! I can't thank you enough for the reassurance :dance:

I didn't panic until I was actually coming out of anaesthetic after surgery. I had been so calm. My first thought was "What have I done??? I have to tell them to take it out now!!!!" Once I came to completely, I was rattled, but OK. My next panic was in the waiting room just before getting my first fill. I practically passed out! Then when it was done, I was amazed---It was nothing! Other than those 2 times, I have been so grateful for this band. Days that it is finicky or I am, I cuss it, but with a smile.

Wow, group thanks for all the reassurence. I am going to have the surgery on the 17th. Yesterday was a hard day cause I spent most of it second guessing about every desicion I have made in the last two months. Inculding LapBand Surgery. And now after reading here today it's just normal. I too have been doing a lot of research and have jumbled myself up. I found this fourm yesterday and it has helped so much. I have had people tell me, well if you can do the liquid diet why can't you do it on your own without surgery??? But I have lost weight only to almost gain double back. I found out about lap band in February, I was considering gastic by-pass thank God that this has opened up for me.

You guys in the forum are soooo helpful and needed thanks.

TerryP-

Good luck.. I hope you make your decision and do well. I look at the band as a wonderful tool that will prevent me from gaining and losing and gaining even more. The endless yo yo syndrome.. You still have to be on a "diet" but the band makes it easy. The band is only a helpful tool, not the easy answer.. I wish I had had it done a few years back but I am so glad that I could do the band because it is reversible if something should go wrong/ I prefer this because it is not nearly as invasive as the bypass. very happy that I did it because I know I will succeed this time... :nervous

hi healthny,

i totally identify with your thoughts and fears.

5 years ago i investigated lap band. in fact i lived in NYC at the time and went to Dr christine ren's seminar. i had the same thoughts you described. "i should be able to do this on my own", "why have a foreign body inside me?" etc. i even didnt like the idea that steak could potentially be a food i wouldnt be able to eat when banded.....i dont even like steak!

in the past 5 years i've gained and lost 100's of lbs and am not better off then in 2002. in fact the doctor has said gaining and losing puts tremendous strain on the heart

fast forward 5 years.....i recently got the band....and am very happy i did it. as everyone has so elequently said...it is a tool and not a "magic bullet"

the other thing that helped me....they told me the band is actually the same material they use in hip replacements. so when i was "grossed out" by a foreign body in me....this made me feel better. if i needed a hip replacement..i wouldnt question what they used...

i have to say i was lucky because this time i went to the seminar on wednesday and was operated on friday. so i didnt have too much time to think. but 5 years in the making

good luck in whatever you decide

Okay, I am starting to panic a bit myself....:help:

I have to lose 5% of my body weight before insurance will let me go ahead and have surgery. I go to the surgeon on Thursday and starting then, the quicker I lose the weight, the better off I will be. I am terrified. I obviously have no idea how to lose the weight. I have done WW, Atkins, Southbeach, etc. in the past and have a very hard time with it....obviously, that is why I am looking at the surgery. I am so confused now as to how many calories, fat, Protein I should eat, that I don't even know where to start now to lose the pre-op weight.

If anyone can help point me in the right direction with some guidelines to follow to help me, I would really appreciate it. I am ready to diet again. I have put myself on hold for too long due to frustration and now I am ready to go....just don't know how to.

=badonkadonkbutt;

Hi... I understand what you are saying, it is frustrating sinece the reason we want the band is that we cant do it. Maybe instead of doing something weird, maybe you coudl just join Weight Watchers for the next few months, they are very common sense and more or less just do regular ordinary food and they count in units, forget what they are called. I did it once. Obviosuly as we all do I eventually gained it back but I think it mught be a good way to go...

I decided to write my post without reading what the others have said...because I didn't want it to influence what I have to say.

I feel like I was in exactly the same position as you....4 years ago....except that I wasn't considering surgery at that point. But I HAD made all the discoveries that you have made about carbs and hunger and clear thinking, etc. I lost the weight and was really exercising for the 1st time in my life and I was within 8# of goal and easily maintaining that weight. I had it all in the bag!! Along the way I had even given away every single stitch of "fat clothes" that I had in my closet. I had nothing but size 10's, 12's and M's in there now. I was a clothes buying fool and was having the time of my life.

Then, little by little, the carbs started creeping back in. And I quit smoking. And menopause hit.

I gained 65# in 2 years .... to the highest weight I have EVER seen on the scale: 215#. And no matter WHAT I DID, not a pound would budge off. I finally came to the realization that after 38 years of battling this MONSTER I was sick and tired of it. I needed some real help. I went through the process. And I joined this board. And I had the very same jitters as you.

I am so happy I had this done. Maybe it's too early to say that...and maybe I shouldn't....but today I am ecstatic!

I'm not going to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. That's not my place. But I just wanted you to consider my story and see if there's anything you can relate to.

I wish you the very best of luck in whatever you decide. The very best.

I so agree with you... I had an appointment with the doctor about 3 years ago and then cancelled and went back and forth and said I didn't need surgery to get thin, How silly.. then I made another appt and cancelled, thought maybe I wasn't heavy enough. Meanwhile I got to my alltime high which was in the morbid obesity range... now I am just obese and so look forward to jsut being in the "overweight" category... So then I started the process last November and am I ever happy I did, shoudl have done it sooner.

I really like you hip replacemnt analogy.. that is so true, who would question having a foreign object in your body if you cant walk. Also my husband broke his arm in shatters many years ago and has had a pin in it ever since and think of all the people who have hardware because of broken bones. It is no different and that makes me feel better too...

hi healthny,

i totally identify with your thoughts and fears.