I knew to some extent I would have to deal with negative or jealous people. But being that I'm still pre op I had no idea there would be so many already. I keep hearing things like. " oh you better start saving money to get all your extra skin cut off" or " people who have that surgery have nothing but problems and are miserable" and " F that diet you have to eat after" also I'm engaged so I was recently asked if we have set a date and I said no we haven't yet we are just getting caught up on our finances as paying off our debts but we are getting closer! A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry" it took everything in me not to jump over the couch and pummel her. Ugh

Wow some really rude people around you. While I have no doubt some people might be thinking some not polite things, no one has said them to my face. Could be because they are scared of me....lol.

Who was the 'woman' who said that to you? <feeling angry on your behalf>

A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry"

:faint:

The best revenge is happiness, because nothing drives people more crazy then seeing someone actually living a good life.

<p>Who was the 'woman' who said that to you? <feeling angry on your behalf></p>

She is a friends friend and I had never even met her before, I was discussing it with my friend when she chimed in.

You don't need to tell another soul that you are having wls. Misery loves company. I wouldn't mention it again, even to the ones that already knows.

I talked about it for a week at work, when the thought first came to mind. Once I got serious I never said another word to anyone. Now four months later, when I go back to work (4 weeks later) after surgery they will never know why. They can only guess why I was out and make there comments to themselves.

<p>Who was the 'woman' who said that to you? <feeling angry on your behalf></p>

She is a friends friend and I had never even met her before, I was discussing it with my friend when she chimed in.

Woah! I'dve replied 'Excuse me?!! And you are?!!'

Oof... I wouldn't have taken that lightly.. I'm sorry you had that. Lets hope your real friend turned to this woman afterwards and said 'Yo, dude, you were bang out of order there...'

You don't need to tell another soul that you are having wls. Misery loves company. I wouldn't mention it again, even to the ones that already knows. <br> I talked about it for a week at work, when the thought first came to mind. Once I got serious I never said another word to anyone. Now four months later, when I go back to work (4 weeks later) after surgery they will never know why. They can only guess why I was out and make there comments to themselves.

The only people I told were my parents and my fiancé and two good friends, this happened to be one of my good friends whose mother in law just had it and she was talking about that and I just happened to mention mine was getting close, I wasn't even aware this person was near or listening. Oh well! Lol

Just don't tell anyone else. The some reason people aren't happy for you when you are trying to improve yourself. You don't know what your friend has said, for the lady to make that comment.

I told my girlfriend, (friends since fourth grade) that I finally got my surgery date. Let me tell you, I have not heard from her since. I have called her several times, with no answer, REALLY. I'm always there for her and now this. Just be careful with who you talk to.

I knew to some extent I would have to deal with negative or jealous people. But being that I'm still pre op I had no idea there would be so many already. I keep hearing things like. " oh you better start saving money to get all your extra skin cut off" or " people who have that surgery have nothing but problems and are miserable" and " F that diet you have to eat after" also I'm engaged so I was recently asked if we have set a date and I said no we haven't yet we are just getting caught up on our finances as paying off our debts but we are getting closer! A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry" it took everything in me not to jump over the couch and pummel her. Ugh

Sorry that happened to you I haven't had any negative experiences but I chose not to tell anyone but close family members and a few friends. About two years ago I had a friend beg me not to even consider wls. She is the reason I chose not to share with a lot of people. I knew I would need all the support and encouragement I could get. My friends and family who do know have been extremely supportive.

On a side note, I've updated my profile picture on Facebook twice in the past six months since I have had surgery. One friend commented stating that I am looking younger and younger and asked what am I doing. I just hit the "like" button. It's my secret, after all. LOL

I knew to some extent I would have to deal with negative or jealous people. But being that I'm still pre op I had no idea there would be so many already. I keep hearing things like. " oh you better start saving money to get all your extra skin cut off" or " people who have that surgery have nothing but problems and are miserable" and " F that diet you have to eat after" also I'm engaged so I was recently asked if we have set a date and I said no we haven't yet we are just getting caught up on our finances as paying off our debts but we are getting closer! A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry" it took everything in me not to jump over the couch and pummel her. Ugh

As much as I hate to say this....you will find negative people who have had WLS.....same reasons. jealousy? Spite?

Just be aware, they are out there and some on this forum...don't let it get you down, stay with the positive stories.....

I knew to some extent I would have to deal with negative or jealous people. But being that I'm still pre op I had no idea there would be so many already. I keep hearing things like. " oh you better start saving money to get all your extra skin cut off" or " people who have that surgery have nothing but problems and are miserable" and " F that diet you have to eat after" also I'm engaged so I was recently asked if we have set a date and I said no we haven't yet we are just getting caught up on our finances as paying off our debts but we are getting closer! A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry" it took everything in me not to jump over the couch and pummel her. Ugh

It's prob a durn good thing I don't live by u! I'd smack that one silly for being so rude to u! U are going to have the normally negative nellies in life for sure... But that was over the top rude and crude!!!

I knew to some extent I would have to deal with negative or jealous people. But being that I'm still pre op I had no idea there would be so many already. I keep hearing things like. " oh you better start saving money to get all your extra skin cut off" or " people who have that surgery have nothing but problems and are miserable" and " F that diet you have to eat after" also I'm engaged so I was recently asked if we have set a date and I said no we haven't yet we are just getting caught up on our finances as paying off our debts but we are getting closer! A woman replied, " she just wants to lose weight first then decide if that's the person she wants to marry" it took everything in me not to jump over the couch and pummel her. Ugh

Oh wow girl i would have gone to jail..

I was often told that's the easy way out slacker. Or your not big enough for WLS. You aren't sick enough. I didn't care what people had to say I pushed them out the door. I've kept only the positive people in my life.

Keep your head up and do what's best for you.

In over twenty months I have only had a couple of negative comments, and each of these I just put down to the person saying them having issues with their own weight. Ultimately, I do believe what other people think of me is none of my business! Let them think what they like, especially if they are as far removed as a friend's friend, really, their opinion of you is of no consequence.

That said, beyond the friend's friend and the horrid comment she made, the other comments are not that nice either. I made the decision a longtime ago to surround myself with positive people who are supportive and encouraging. It does make a difference. Choose not to surround yourself with such rude people!

I just smile and say " Oh thank you soooo very much for caring about me " turn on my heel and call them nasty names under my breathe! Stay away from toxic people..this journey is YOURS ! and you made the RIGHT choices! Hang in there and don't be ashamed or deney yourself support from good, knowledgable and caring friends and family...