ATM's

A new sign in the Bank Lobby reads:

"Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through ATM machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts."

"After months of careful research, MALE & FEMALE Procedures have been developed. Please follow the appropriate steps for your gender."

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash, and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents onto passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty hand bag, locate card holder, and place card into the slot provided

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release parking brake.

I'm a female and I think its funny as hell and sometimes true. I needed a good chuckle. Thanks.

TEE HEE good one.

edie

lol loved it { but with tongue in cheek a bit close to real life ha ha }

Hmm...so true, so true. :guess

My husband would soooooo agree with you. Everytime I can't find something, he wants to take my purse and dump it upside down!

I think one of the things I should have put on my "peeves" list would have been this. It drives me nuts having to wait at the drive through ATM, behind someone who isn't prepared. Or having to wait for someone who decides to do their whole month's worth of banking while there's a line up behind them. Go inside if you need to do that!

It never seems to fail that the person in front of me is doing his/her banking for life, so I wait and wait and wait. I'm usually prepared though my purse, which should be registered as a lethal weapon, sometimes defeats me. I have noticed that if I take the old Cadillac to the ATM, I can't get close enough and have to open the door. If I take my RAV 4, it works really well. So I avoid taking the Cadillac. The damn thing is enormous.

Lol..it is very rude to be spying on me! lol....I only drive a few feet with the brake on though in my defense! lol....