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Oh...the doubts!

Good Morning.

Before posting this message, I've been mulling over some comments made to me the other day. But since I can't 'just let it go', I'm writing in to you all.

I went to my hairdresser the other day. I told her that I'd next be in right before my surgery; yes - I told her about the Band. She said she heard of it, a friend she just saw at a holiday party had it done. **then came the the sucker punch to my gut. She went onto say stuff like "Oh, well you know...you really don't loose weight that fast with that. She ONLY looked as if she were just dieting". "You know, you loose much faster with the Bypass". That was enough to send me into another 'self doubt' about my pending surgery. So I have been online, looking at another 'obesity' website, checking out the photos, etc. I learned that these AMAZING results are from the Bypass; no pics from lap band folks. Now I KNOW how amazing you all have done, how healthy, gorgeous and amazing your photos show you as you are today. I guess I was just disturbed by the 'lack' of Banders out there...other than what I find here. Then I also think, what IF I don't loose weight with the band...will I then go onto getting Bypass? I keep thinking that I'm going to be 'missing out', parties, events, etc. I keep thinking I am going to be 'changed for life'...almost obsessing that this is the end of my life as I know it. ***Maybe this is all jitters. I hate 2nd guessing myself. Mostly, I feel like I'm letting you all down; as if I'm doubting your faith in that this can and IS being done - and successfully.

:confused:

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Sherilynn, this just shows you that there are important differences between banding and bypass, and it's crucial that patients understand and embrace these differences going in. It's absolutely true that you don't lose as fast with the band: it takes longer to lose weight because there is only one action at work--you eat less. With bypass you not only eat less, you also absorb fewer of the calories you DO eat. Depending on your goals, that could be both a blessing and a curse.

If these are things that concern you, think more about what you want out of weight loss surgery. The only way to choose the right one FOR YOU is to be totally honest with yourself before making the decision. Don't do it because someone else said something, or because you feel like you might let someone else down (US? That's absurd.). This is about YOUR health, YOUR future, and if the band isn't right for you knowing it now will save you lots of heartache.

This is YOUR faith, don't worry yourself with letting anyone else down. We all respect that this is your journey.

That said, I was looking at old weight charts and noticed that back in Jan of this year, I was hovering around the 190 mark. Here it is Decemebr, and I'm hovering around the 175 mark. This morning, 173.4 (yay me) and I just KNEW I'm be so much closer to pushing goal weight than this.

I'm taking it off like I put it on...10-15 pounds a year. Yup, it's slower. So what? is my attitude. It's my weight to lose and it's my journey. I'm healthy. As anxious as I am, I'll lose it. And I'll work for it, with the help of my band.

I keep thinking of RNYers who (and not all of them do this) lose a ton of weight the first 18 months and then start gaining it back. They struggle just like we Bandsters do. So, yeah, you'll probably lose weight faster initially with RNY. And you may very well be discouraged along your band journey.

But, almost 3 years since I first walked into Curves at over 240 pounds, I have lost about 70% of my excess weight. I like that. It's hard to look at the longer-term picture of the future. I know this. But I couldn't have dreamed of how much better I feel getting most of this weight off. It's been worth it. Oh yeah. I wouldn't change a thing. That old life HAS ended. I like the new one better.

And you ARE dieting with the band. You can simply eat less and get a good amount of weight off in the beginning, but at some point, you really do have to "diet". Choose well. It's how anyone loses weight.

Good luck. I know it's hard, it's a tough decision. Your job is to OWN your choice. Have confidence in it, even though you know it isn't a free ride. Then get to work. The band really does help.

I would take that as a sign not to tell everyone about you having surgery. I have family members that ask me about how much weight I have lost EVERY TIME I see them. Even if I just saw them two days before. I keep telling them that I will only lose approximately 2 pounds per week. I prefer to lose it slow like that because I don't want to have hanging skin from losing it too fast.

You must do what is right for you, whichever choice you make. You are the only one that counts.

Good luck in your research.

Hi. I don't post much on this site, but have read alot of posts on my journey. I am here to say that I had my surgery in July and have been happy with my band. I have lost 53 lbs in 4.5 months. I have been so pumped up about this decision that I made until yesterday...My cousin went through with her surgery on November 21st and was so excited about it and told everyone that I was her role model and she wasn't afraid because I had done so well. Two days after her surgery, she started feeling real bad and was having severe pains and nausea. My mom took her back to the doctor that did her surgery and they determined that she was very dehydrated, had a touch of pneumonia, a urinary tract infection, a kidney stone, an infection in her port site and two blood clots around the band. Yesterday morning she had her band removed and yesterday afternoon, she died. I don't tell you this to keep you from getting the band, because mine is still a success...I only tell you this to make sure you take care of yourself and know the risks that are involved in this surgery. I will never be the same now, because I will always look at myself and know that I have a band in my body and always think that if I hadn't started this journey that my cousin would have never had hers done and would still be here with her two daughters today. Thank you for reading my post and I hope that if you decide to do this surgery that you will realize how serious the doctors are when they tell you to breathe, sip sip and walk walk....

Tricia Self

I had all those same thoughts/feelings. I even tried to get my surgeon (who does all types of WLS) to choose for me! In the end, I chose the band. One of the things that helped me decide was the fact that my doctor is banded himself. I figured, if he had access to all the procedures, and the knowledge to choose the best one, there had to be a reason he picked the band.

Another of my major concerns was Osteoporosis. It runs in my family. Malabsorption means you don't absorb all the food you eat OR vitamins, meds, etc. I discussed this with my PCP and he advised me that if I wanted to go the bypass or DS route I would need to switch to IV Boniva, instead of the pill. Plus, I am not good at taking pills every day or getting check-ups, and once your plumbing is rearranged , it is imperitive that you take the supplements, have regular blood work, etc.

My final deciding factor was that my son had a neighbor - a young mother - who had bypass and died from complications about 3 months post-op. It was a real "it can happen to anyone" moment.

There are certainly pros and cons to every WLS. You just have to weigh them for yourself (no pun intended) and choose the one that best "fits" you. A quick weight loss was never one of my considerations, however, and I think of all the possibilities, it should be at the bottom of the list. But that's just me.....maybe losing 100 pounds in six months sounds like a good thing to you. To me, it sounded unhealthy and a sure way to develop lots of saggy baggy skin.

There are so many more options with the lap band procedure rather than the bypass.

Then look at the variety of complications and the morbidity potential.

It's your decision of course, but if you're asking for input, mine is simple: GO with the band!

It's not about weight as much as it is about health. You have plenty of time to loose weight with the band. Yes it will take longer and you will have to try harder that you would if you have the bypass. Think about this. With the band you will eventually be able to eat foods that you will NEVER be able to eat with bypass. (Sweets and rich food) With bypass sweets make you so sick b/c how your body absords them. I have seen my aunt (had bypass) be sooooo sick from one bite of Cheesecake that it ruined her whole (like 6 hours) night.

In my opinion. The only thig good about bypass is that you loose weight faster , and even that is not good becasue you are left with lots of loose skin.

I could have had bypass, insurance would ahve paid 100%

I chose to have lap band and pay 15,000 of my own money.

Just know what you are deciding, and do your homework. Don't worry about the weight(how much, how fast), just do what you think is most healthy for you. email me if you would like.

Hi. I don't post much on this site, but have read alot of posts on my journey. I am here to say that I had my surgery in July and have been happy with my band. I have lost 53 lbs in 4.5 months. I have been so pumped up about this decision that I made until yesterday...My cousin went through with her surgery on November 21st and was so excited about it and told everyone that I was her role model and she wasn't afraid because I had done so well. Two days after her surgery, she started feeling real bad and was having severe pains and nausea. My mom took her back to the doctor that did her surgery and they determined that she was very dehydrated, had a touch of pneumonia, a urinary tract infection, a kidney stone, an infection in her port site and two blood clots around the band. Yesterday morning she had her band removed and yesterday afternoon, she died. I don't tell you this to keep you from getting the band, because mine is still a success...I only tell you this to make sure you take care of yourself and know the risks that are involved in this surgery. I will never be the same now, because I will always look at myself and know that I have a band in my body and always think that if I hadn't started this journey that my cousin would have never had hers done and would still be here with her two daughters today. Thank you for reading my post and I hope that if you decide to do this surgery that you will realize how serious the doctors are when they tell you to breathe, sip sip and walk walk....

Tricia Self

Oh my Tricia ,

I am so very sorry for the loss of your cousin.. I cant even image what you and your family is going through.

I just wasnt expecting that outcome when I was reading your post.:confused:

Well, I've lost 58 pounds in 2 months. I've never done that dieting before. I don't know anyone who has.

There are a lot of amazing transformations here. With the lapband, you get what you put into it. In my local support group, there are some folks who haven't done that well. But I listen to what they're doing...and they're not following the rules. Of course, it's hard to follow the rules all the time, but my point is...whatever you decide, you're going to have to make an effort.

Also...I have a friend who had gastric bypass. She hasn't lost very much. She's 2 years out and I've almost caught up with her in 2 months. But, once again, she doesn't follow the rules.

One more thing...lapband hasn't been around as long, and I think a lot of surgeons who have severely obese patients are pushing them into bypass rather than lapband. And the severly obese patients are the ones with amazing before and after pictures because they don't even resemble the same person they were.

My cousin went through with her surgery on November 21st and was so excited about it and told everyone that I was her role model ... Yesterday morning she had her band removed and yesterday afternoon, she died.

Oh Tricia, I'm so sorry for your loss. Please try not to beat yourself up about this. I hope your family isn't blaming you & I hope you are remembering you only wanted the best for your cousin. There are risks to ANY surgery--and certainly many to being overweight.

My heart goes out to you.

Hi. I don't post much on this site, but have read alot of posts on my journey. I am here to say that I had my surgery in July and have been happy with my band. I have lost 53 lbs in 4.5 months. I have been so pumped up about this decision that I made until yesterday...My cousin went through with her surgery on November 21st and was so excited about it and told everyone that I was her role model and she wasn't afraid because I had done so well. Two days after her surgery, she started feeling real bad and was having severe pains and nausea. My mom took her back to the doctor that did her surgery and they determined that she was very dehydrated, had a touch of pneumonia, a urinary tract infection, a kidney stone, an infection in her port site and two blood clots around the band. Yesterday morning she had her band removed and yesterday afternoon, she died. I don't tell you this to keep you from getting the band, because mine is still a success...I only tell you this to make sure you take care of yourself and know the risks that are involved in this surgery. I will never be the same now, because I will always look at myself and know that I have a band in my body and always think that if I hadn't started this journey that my cousin would have never had hers done and would still be here with her two daughters today. Thank you for reading my post and I hope that if you decide to do this surgery that you will realize how serious the doctors are when they tell you to breathe, sip sip and walk walk....

Tricia Self

Tricia, I didn't see your post before when I was on this thread. I am so sorry about your cousin. This really hits home because a couple of my family members are thinking about having the surgery because of me. I know you feel somewhat responsible, but I'm sure your cousin knew the risks going into the surgery and overcame her fears as we all did. It's certainly normal to mourn, but don't beat yourself up over this. And, again, I'm really sorry for your loss.

Tricia, I'm so sorry to hear of your family's tragedy. It's so sad when people's quest for better health comes to such an end. :(

Sherilynn,

I think we can all remind you of why WE chose/are choosing the band, but no one, not even you will know the outcome (so sorry to hear about your cousin Tricia) so it's important to be comfortable with your decision.

One of the reasons that I want the band rather than bypass is the fact that I don't want to just lose weight, I want to be healthy. You can eat junk food with both surgeries but since with the bypass you don't absorb as many calories I felt I would use that as an excuse to continue eating the same types of food as before. I want to HAVE to chnage my eating choices to make a significant difference. You CAN be thin AND unhealthy and that's not what I want for myself.

I also like the slower weightloss factor because 1)may allow the skin to shrink along with the weight loss better than what the bypass would allow and 2)Honestly I think I'll have to answer less invasive questions with the weight coming off slowly. 1-2 lbs a week is easier to explain as "eating less moving more" than is 50 lbs in one month.

I do want to say to Tricia though, please don't ever blame yourself. Your cousin made the choice to have the surgery and if she hadn't heard about it from your experience she would have found out about it some other way. She chose the SAFEST of the two surgeries and my heart goes out to you and your family that she passed away. My sincerest condolences>

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