Hey y'all:

I have been wrestling with conflicting feelings about the surgery. I have begun the process to have the sleeve procedure done, and I'm really excited. At least I think I'm excited?

I still wonder: Why can't I just eat as if I had already had the procedure done? Will I feel less gratified with the weight loss than I would have felt had I done it by sheer will power?

I have been failing at this for so long that I think this is my best option, at this point. They do say, the best predictor of future behavior is past behavior, right? And I'm tired of failing, ya know? So why can't I just be happy?? Bah.

Sorry for the rant, but you're kinda supposed to do that in a forum right?

Anyways, I'm just reaching out because I know I can't be the only one that feels this way.

Is anyone going through this right now? Or - if you've been there, how did you get past it?

Look we were all nervous about having surgery to cut our stomachs' date=' but the truth is I have been on hundreds of diets and lost over 100 pounds countless times, but each time I would put it all back on and another 20 pounds more. But I can honestly say I have no regrets (I should have done it sooner). I am down 116 pounds and able to say will stay off!!

Good luck in whatever you decide!![/quote']

So happy for you!!!! Congrats!!!! I hope I will be there soon!

I am so torn too. Not torn about should I do it or not but should I have tried harder before. If that makes any sense. I feel like I am saying to myself I can't do it alone....I know there is nothing wrong with that. I just have guilt. I am hoping this will fade away. I have my consultation on March 27th. I was really hoping it would be sooner since I am already a patient. These next few weeks are going to kill me!

You will make it hang in there!!!

Christen, I freely admit that I couldn't have done this on my own. Does that make me a failure? NO. It makes me a woman who was smart enough to see that I was dying and brave enough to take a chance. My reward is that I rolled double sixes and I now have a new life that I get to make as wonderful as I'll let myself make it. I'm happy and content and that shows to other people in ways I'd have never imagined before surgery. I did this for me, but it wasn't easy. I double dog dare anyone to tell me I took the easy way out. And then I'm going to wake that person up at six am every morning to go to the gym with me, make them track their food and water intake daily, make them weigh every morning, lift weights while they drive down the highway, do yoga stretches for flexibility, and, in general, try to keep up with ME!