Hi everyone,

My doctor told me yesterday that I really should have Lap Band surgery and he wants to schedule me with the surgeon. We had discussed it before, but now it seems like it's more than a suggestion from him. Simple as that. Dieting hasn't worked. Pregnancy weight decided to stick around for the long run. It's my fault. I know. You don't get this fat on celery and 3 mile jogs. I did this. But I also always thought of my weight as my temporary problem. I didn't want to face obesity as "me" but rather as just something I had to get past - like a cold.

I feel like Lap Band is the point of no return. It defines me as an obese person - not a normal person who is temporarily obese. Does that make sense? And at the same time, a point of hope. Ok, not really. I say "hope" but I still keep saying in my head "I've become the fat person who gets obesity surgery." Can anyone relate? Meaning, I'm so fat that I've become one of "those" people. And yet, perhaps this is the chance to hope to be normal again.

My husband loves me, but he didn't sign up for someone quite as fat as I am.

My baby daughter loves me, but what sort of example am I setting for her? What will her expectations regarding weight be? Will she resign herself to one day being as fat as I am?

I am 5'5" and I just tipped 250 lbs. 250! It's a magic number, so it seems. 250 seems like it might as well be 300 or 400 or get-out-the-crane-she-wants-out-of-bed sort of deal. I could fool myself as long as I didn't hit this awful terrible number. And then I did, yesterday at the doctor's office, where he didn't have the scale set at -5lbs like I have the dial set at home (where I spit into the sink and take off my jewelry and use the toilet and stay in there until I can pretend I see 239.)

And with all this, maybe Lap Band can help me be normal again! Is there really hope? Dare I get so excited to think that there's a tool to help me solve this problem ... that if I just get past the mental block, I can actually be another boring normal-weight someone who disappears in a crowd?

~Piper

P.S. I am sorry if I have offended anyone by saying I don't want to be "one of those people." I'm just being honest with my feelings about what Lap Band suggests. Didn't anyone else feel like that? I'm sorry.

Hey NuMe, I'm not schedueld yet for my surgery, but hopefully on Monday, at my appointment, I will get that shceduled. My insurance is not covering it. My employer has chosen that as an exclusion, so the only hope I have is for my employer to change their policy, which ain't gonna happen, so I'm gettin a loan, and I'm goin in debt!!! Oh well, it happens.

I was 5'6" and 300lbs when I was banded a year ago. The first step toward any problem is to focus on what is important. We all know what being obese is a problem, obesity kills.

No, I don't think anyone should be pushed into a surgery, but you need to be realistic as to the risks you take staying obese versus having surgery.

Personally I looked at the chance I would lose 150lbs on my own and keep it off long term. I knew the chances were zero and that I had to do something drastic to insure I would see my daughter grow up and be an active parent she deserves.

It's a personal choice. Think about it and do what's right for YOU.

Best wishes,

Like someone else said, this surgery does not define you as being an obese person. You are obese whether or not you have this surgery. Having it will only define you as someone who is trying to live a healthier, longer life than they probably would have without the surgery.

I haven't had the surgery yet. I am in the middle of trying to get my insurance to cover it. I am only 23 and 5' 3" tall, but I weigh around 215 pounds. My mother is obese, my father is overweight. I have a very extensive family history of diabetes, heart disease, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc. My mother even had to have both knees replaced because her weight wore the joints out. Because of my weight, I have PCOS, very high cholesterol, asthma, and I am prediabetic. I have tried several times to lose weight, but all the weight I lose always comes back, plus extra. I finally came to the conclusion that if I didn't do something drastic, I was going to keep gaining weight. I would be 300-400 pounds, with diabetes and heart disease. I would be unable to do my job. My family doesn't really understand why I am taking this step. They think I should keep trying to diet and exercise. But I know myself. I can't do this alone. The lap-band will give me the help I need.

You need to think about this very hard. Like other people have said, don't let anyone push you into anything you aren't ready for. But also be honest with yourself. Look at your history. If you truly believe that you can lose the weight by dieting and exercising and that you aren't ready for the lap-band, don't get it. But if you are like me, and you know you can't do it on your own, the lap-band is an option.

Piper! You could be my twin. Two statements you made, really stuck with me:

I feel like Lap Band is the point of no return. It defines me as an obese person - not a normal person who is temporarily obese. Does that make sense? And at the same time, a point of hope. Ok, not really. I say "hope" but I still keep saying in my head "I've become the fat person who gets obesity surgery." Can anyone relate? Meaning, I'm so fat that I've become one of "those" people. And yet, perhaps this is the chance to hope to be normal again.

and

Whenever I've tried to talk about my weight with any of my friends or family, it's always been brushed off (you carry it well, you can lose it, you're ok, it's not so bad, etc - even though I knew that 100+ lbs of excess weight is not "ok") ... I'm not sure if the intent was to encourage me, to make me feel better, or whatever ... but I've never really been able to talk about this.

Both of these statements is how I feel, especially the first one. "Me? Need surgery? Im not always going to be this size and I work out 3 times a week! No Way" But sadly, it's Yes Way. It is a hard pill of reality to swallow. The second statement you made really hit home, too! "You have such a pretty face, you dont look like you weigh that much, etc etc etc" are the most common phrases I hear. And it makes me angry that no one had enough guts to sit me down and talk to me about my weight. It took a jerk plastic surgeon to let the reality set in.

So, no matter how hard it is to face reality, just know that reality has always been there...you and I have just been ignoring it. Good luck and please email me if you ever want to talk, okay...because I really can relate to your feelings.

Stephanee