Hey guys =)

It is 5:38 in the morning and I haven't been able to sleep thinking about this surgery. My parents talked to me last night and asked me how I felt about the surgery, and my answer was "I don't know, its already scheduled so let's get it over with."

I think I should tell you my history a little bit:

Weight has always been an issue with my parents. MY weight to be exact. I actually had liposuction when I was 15, and I lost weight but I gained it all back when I entered college last year. Ive tried diet pills, diet, exercise, Gyms, everything. . My parents have talked about this sleeve since the middle of last year and I didn't want to so it. They tried to convince my boyfriend into persuading me into getting it around the beginning of January. When we talked about it he said "I'm sick of your parents being so obsessed over your weight and this surgery. I would get it done just so they don't bother you anymore". I said I felt the exact same way. So after fights and fights I said okay...I'll do it.

I just want them to leave me alone.

Here's the thing, I'm not "sure" I want to do this. I love to eat. I love food. I would be a chef if I could. I Love to cook and try new things. I'm known for eating a lot, and for not caring if I'm thin or not. I know this surgery isn't about being thin, it's about being healthy. Yeah I know. It just seems that being thin is all that matters here.

I

I'm scheduled for surgery on the 22nd of this month and I'm absolutely freaking out. I don't know if I want to do this. I need help...please. I need orientation.

hun' date=' you sound very young - this is a hard decision for anyone any age to decide on major surgery for weight loss

you are more than doubtful about the surgery (like many of us are/were)

you hint all over the post that you really don't want the surgery - but you'll give in just to shut your parents up!!!

if you have the sleeve - you'll be the one that needs to follow all the hard rules of the sleeve - from drinking 64+ ounces of Water, to all the other water rules for the rest of your life

eating very small portions. i'm sure (i hope) you know totally whats involved with everything post surgery

this is a forever new life that you need to adhere to many new rules

you can loose the weight if you follow the rules - and work with your sleeve - the sleeve "assists" you, acting as tool in helping you to loose lots of weight.

But you have to do a lot of hard work for the REST OF YOUR LIFE to keep the weight off for good

it is not a quick fix - no way, no how

you must want this for yourself - you can't do this "to give in to your parents"!!!

your serious doubts - even admitting you don't want surgery - IMO it would be a mistake to have surgery just to please your parents

All parents only want the best for their children - but you need to do this surgery for yourself, not your parents

i'm so sorry your parents have been on your case all your life

just because surgery is already scheduled for january 22nd, doesn't mean you can't change your mind and cancel

sure you 'could" talk to someone about your concerns - maybe a friend or relative

if you have the surgery it must be because you want it!!! you yourself, no one should push you

IMO you need to stand up to your parents (it will be hard) but having an invasive surgery???i

f you don't want it now????don't do it

good luck[/quote']

Listen to her! This needs to be something you want! I have had pressures from my family on things too and at one point did something I didn't want to do.. I think about it to this day and regret it 23 years later.. You can reschedule it to give yourself more time to think about what YOU WANT. Talk to a therapist and if you can't do that talk with someone you trust ..

Sweetie you posted here for a reason...because you were looking for support and feedback. Sounds like everyone is saying the same thing. Do what is going to make YOU the most content. It's all about you.

Trust me, I've read the replies over and over. I knoW I still have a lot to think about. I know that whatever I decide I have to think about myself.

Hi, I just read some of your other posts you seem like nice girl just remember... your body your choice, not ours or your parents! And I'm sure whatever you chose your parents will still love you!

Bottom line if you don't want to do it, don't do it for someone else (not even your parents)

Thank you =) thanks to everyone for the replies.

have a lot to think about. whatever I decide I have to think about myself.

paulalevia

i'm glad you are realizing that you need to think this over very carefully before you jump into surgery

like everyone says, you must do this for you, yourself and YOU

post op, eating smaller portions is for the rest of your life - a very difficult decision, but i know you can conclude what is right for YOU - no one else

you have another week to think VERY carefully about your decision-its never too late to cancel

don't let your parents sway you

everyone (most everyone) agree that having WLS is the best thing in the world

maybe at a later date you will opt to have surgery - but if you are not ready now. or ever, thats perfectly ok too...

to be fair, don't let anyone of else sway your decision - the ball is in your court

good luck bud

I will agree with everything everyone else has said-if you're not doing this for yourself then DON'T do it! It's like dealing with any other addiction-if you try to give it up for someone else you'll relapse. food is an addiction just like cigarettes, drugs, alcohol. You might lose the weight that your parents want you to lose, but you are going to start harboring a lot of resentment once you are going thru the physical pain, restrictions, and mental process of what the sleeve brings. I have not been sleeved yet, but by what everyone says you have to be mentally prepared with what you'll be faced with. I am ready 100% for the surgery (I had to convince others that this was the best choice for me), but I still have worries/fears. It's natural to have fears, but if you're doing it just to get other people off your back, I'm afraid for you!

You're an adult and I completely agree that your weight should not be open for discussion. You need to make that very clear to your parents. The boundary lines seem very blurred and even if you do this they'll probably just focus on something else. Good luck with whatever you decide!