Since I am facing losing my band next week, I have to find a way to do it on my own. I would MUCH MUCH MUCH rather do it with the band, but that's just too bad. So, I'm going to have to suck it up, and be brutally honest with myself and my pre-band eating habits.

1. Being constantly hungry is NOT a license to eat a whole large deep dish pizza. Or a whole bucket of fried chicken. Or a whole casserole of lasagna.

2. Occasionally having a piece of pizza, or fried chicken, or lasagna is NOT the problem. However, if that doesn't satisfy my hunger, I will have to fill up on less calorically dense foods, like fruits, vegetables and lean Proteins if I want to maintain my weight loss.

3. I will NOT drink WITH my meals.

4. I will eat regularly, and not wait until I am STARVING and in a panic about food.

5. I will PLAN. I will PLAN. I will PLAN.. That means I will have nutritious food available for every meal. I will not fall into my prior bad habits of hitting fast food places and super-sizing because I never got around to making a lunch to take to work.

6. I will CHEW my food.

7. I will eat SLOWLY.

8. I will stop eating after 20 minutes.

9. I will find ways to distract myself from thoughts of food when I am not physically hungry.

10. I will NEVER DIET.

11. I will make nutritious choices 70% of the time.

12. When I have a bout of unstoppable hunger/cravings, I will satisfy my craving for any kind of food with ONE normal person serving. If I am still hungry I have permission from myself to eat as much vegetables, fruit and lean proteins as I can cram in there.

13. I will Water load before meals.

14. I will drink my gallon of water a day.

15. I will do a minimum of 20 minutes walking each day.

16. I will faithfully and frequently check-in with my beloved bandster buddies to receive the support, love and understanding that I will need, particularly when things are not going as well as planned.

17. I will practice using my emotional hunger tools, and revisit my eating addiction therapy tools often.

18. I will concentrate on HEALTH, not weight.

19. I will open myself to inspiration.

20. I will be gentle and loving with myself every step of the way.

Feel free to add things I may have missed!!

Good for a silly chuckle:

One day a farmer's donkey fell into a well.

The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer

tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he

decided the animal was old, and the well needed to

be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to

retrieve the donkey.

He invited his neighbors to come over and

help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to

shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey

realized what was happening and cried horribly.

Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally

looked down the well. He was astonished at what he

saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back,

the donkey was doing something amazing. He would

shake it off and take a step up.

As the farmer's neighbors continued to shovel

dirt on top of the animal, he would shake it off

and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was

amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of

the well and happily trotted off!

Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of

dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to

shake it off and take a step up. Each of our

troubles is a steppingstone. We can get out of the

deepest wells just by not stopping, never giving

up! Shake it off and take a step up.

Remember the five simple rules to be happy:

1. Free your heart from hatred - Forgive.

2. Free your mind from worries - Most never

happen.

3. Live simply and appreciate what you have.

4. Give more.

5. Expect less

NOW --------

Enough of that crap .

The donkey later came back and bit the shit out

of the farmer who had tried to bury him. The gash

from the bite got infected, and the farmer

eventually died in agony from septic shock.

MORAL FROM TODAY'S LESSON:

When you do something wrong and try to cover your

ass, it always comes back to bite you.

Hi Barb -

I'm self-pay, so getting rebanded even six months down the road (earliest I could have it re-done) is probably not going to work into my finances.

Plus, most of the info I have read states that the likelihood of re-eroding is much higher than the first time around.

At this time I'm planning on relying on Meridia if the hunger gets to an unmanageable level. I'm sure as time goes by, other options will present themselves.

If I did get rebanded, I think I would try the mid-band because it does seem to have a lower erosion rate. But, like I said, I'm still paying off the $17,000 the initial banding, port-revision, and unbanding has cost.

No more self-pay for a while!!!

DeLarla -

Love the chuckle...

No, I haven't heard greated stats of erosion for Lopez patients, but it's hard to get good stats of any kind. Sigh. I know of three erosions from him - me, a friend who had nothing but problems from the get go, and a gal on another board whom I've never met. I have no idea what that means in his ratio. I still need to call Inamed to make sure the erosion gets reported - I don't know if they keep stats on individual surgeons, or if they'd share that info even if they had it.

I hope it's not true, since he bands a lot of people.

Donali,

Did you ever consider having the removal done in the states as an emergency procedure? Would your insurance cover that at all? I know I have suggested this before but never heard why you won't seem to do that? Just curious... I have mentioned before that my insurance would cover a major emergency with the band but wouldn't actually cover the installation of the band. Hope you have a good night, Teresa

Thanks for the suggestion, Teresa. I feel like I responded to that somewhere... Could have been a personal email to someone else. Sorry.

My insurance is Kaiser, and they outsource all their bariatric surgery to Pacific Bariatrics, and Pacific Bariatrics does not do bands. I really am not comfortable in having a surgeon unfamiliar with the band take it out - it's a more complicated procedure than putting it in, so I really want someone familiar with the process doing it.

If I were in great pain and suffering, and it was a genuine health emergency, of course I would have the closest surgeon with a knife go in and see what they could do. But since it's not an emergency, and my life is not in danger (I don't think! ), I feel safer and more comforrable letting the guy who put it in take it out.

Just one of the drawbacks of being self-pay - you have to accept these possibilities.

Why is the removal procedure more complicated? Can't Gross Darcy just do it for you? I'm thinking some manicure scissors and tweezers would do the trick, kinda like the game Operation. "Remove Eroded Band."

Is it complicated because of something special they have to do with your stomach after removing the band? Like massage it open? Answer this: when they place the band, are their stitches in the band/port? I'm asking because my missing port is really sore. I only had it a month, during which time it acted like a Water Weenie and was all over the place, but from just that short time I have major, major scar tissue in a very large area. Is that part of the difficulty - unattaching the port?

Babydoll, I wish I could be there holding your hanny. Love you. xo

It's more complicated because of two things:

1. Undoing the suturing of the stomach around the band which helped hold the band in place, which should have formed some scar tissue

2. Fixing the stomach wall affected by the erosion. If there's an actual hole, they have to sew that shut. Not sure what they do if the wall is still intact, but super thin like it appears in my photos. I'll have to ask the doc.

I DID think about having Gross Darcy do it, but she'll be recovering from her band procedure on the 30th, and I don't want to over-tax her...

WE'RE THINKING OF YOU DARCY!!!!!

Donali, I consulted my crystal ball and rubbed my Genie lamp: After they remove your band, there will be severe hardened scar tissue under where the band was, which is sort of like a cement band, so you'll only be able to accommodate small portions of food for life. I'm sorry, but you'll experience continued weight loss after band removal.

Wouldn't that be dreamy?

Donali,

I don't think I could be as brave as you. I am going to admit it. I would crumble. I am going to print your list to remind me how smart and determined you are. I have given a lot of thought to what I would do if my band eroded, and honestly I just don't know what I would do. I am so compulsive even now with food, that I am afraid I would fail miserably. The only other choice I would have is gastric bypass, and I probably would do that if I saw the habits and weight returning. God bless you and hopefully something else with happen and you can get the band back. Technology is changing as we type and they may have something to fix the eroding problem in the process. After your stomach heals and a few months have gone by, I would at least ask about it. It is to their advantage to help those of you that lose your band. If you don't mind posting it, what happened that you knew something was wrong?

I am truly sorry for your setback, but now that you know the taste of sucess and how truly wonderful it feels, I pray that you are able to maintain or even lose more.

Good luck to you...

Terry Evans

I'm sorry, but you'll experience continued weight loss after band removal.

YES!!!! That would definitely be dreamy! Thanks for the reading...

If you don't mind posting it, what happened that you knew something was wrong?

Terry, I don't mind... The thing is, I really have/had no symptoms. I had what felt like a gallbladder attack on Thursday, 6/3. I had been meaning to go in for my annual band check-up, and had just kept putting it off because everything was wonderful, no problems, happy as a clam. Since I DON'T have a gallbladder anymore (removed in 1992), I decided I better check out the band so I could say with authority to my PCP that my band wasn't the problem.

So.... The gallbladder-like attack could have been due to the erosion, but not necessarily. I just take it as a sign from a guardian angel to get me to finally have my routine band check-up. I may have been passing a stone in my bile duct. Who knows? If the pain comes back after the band is removed, then I'll know for sure it wasn't the band. Didn't feel like the band, but the pain was in the band area.

I am hopeful that I will either be able to keep the weight off on my own, or find another tool offered by medicine/science to help me.

Donali, I've been so stressed over money that I'm even worried about everyone else's, and I think you should still "possibly consider" letting your insurance cover the removal. Just toss it around in your head once more.

I realize you want it done by an experience lap band doc, but don't you think (hope, anyway) that our American bariatric surgeons would be more than qualified after talking directly to your Mexico doctor? I say this because when I had my port problem and went to Urgent Care, the Urgent Care doctor didn't know how to help me. Later, Dr. Ortiz was nice enough to take my call and help me. Dr. Ortiz said he'd be more than willing to talk to my doctors, local surgeons, Urgent Care staff, etc., to guide them. Bariatric surgeons have to do tons of operations, so I don't think removal of a lapband would be much different than removal of a tumor, correction of a bypass-gone-wrong, etc., fixing people from car wrecks or other massive injuries (since Gross Darcy is busy.)

Just a thought to save you some gambling money.

Lisa, I've wondered that, too. Penni can get a list of California (probably San Diego) lapband drs. My surgeon's speciality is laproscopic surgery. He did multiple surgeries on me at time of band placement. There HAS to be a California dr. with plenty of experience. That would certainly help you financially (and maybe long term.)

Yep, Jeannie, I'd rather see Donali lose five grand playing video poker or dollar Keno! Much more fun! xo

I have a doc's appointment tomorrow, and I will ask him what he thinks.

Thanks for all the good advice.

Most definitely. You have to ask? lol

I was doing a cleanse. I had a book. I was so totally sold.

But... I let it be about WEIGHT and not HEALTH, so was relying on the scale to judge my success. Hence the mind games, and then the early demise of my cleanse. A two week basic fast, plus a day for each year of life to repair all the damage done to my cells with preservative and free radicals, etc.

Another pitfall to avoid that I forgot to put on my list.

21. I will not give the scale power over my journey.

Did you do the master cleanse diet? I'm starting it next week hopefully.