Yesterday was another stern reminder that my motivation needs to stay high. I have been having a hard time figuring out what makes my body happy, but running in negative calories is surely NOT it. Every 2-3 months I have to go in for a spinal epidural because my cervical and thoracic vertebrae are so damaged from years of smoking, being overweight, gymnastics, dancing, power lifting etc. I have not treated myself well and am still fairly young and really paying for it. I sat in the office and came about as close as possible to a panic attack. It was obvious I need it or there was NO WAY someone having the emotional reaction to that I do would lay down on that table again. Sad thing is, I am great with pain. It is something about the spinal stuff that I REALLY do not react well to. I feel so much better than just two months ago. I was in so much pain the day of the surgery, lying flat to get into position really hurt on that cold table. I went from a daily pain level of 6 to a 2 or 3. Don't get me wrong, I still can't do what I used to do. Heavy lifting is pretty much out for me (I always took pride in not needing help for things). However, I am only 29 lbs down and my pain level as gone down SO much. I didn't even make another appointment. I decided if 30 lbs does this what can 45, or 60 do? I feel like such a wuss, but I just can't do this again. Every time I think about not going to the gym, or eating something that I maybe shouldn't have. I will be thinking of the multi-yearly spinal epidurals and the subsequent day of ridiculous pain, followed by a week of solid discomfort. I swear they get worse every time!

So sorry you're going through this. But you sound like a tough lady. You're doing the right things to get healthier. Hang in there, hopefully in another month or so this will all seem trivial. Take care.

I hope you get the kind of back pain relief you're seeking. I know my knee pain has almost completely gone away. I say almost because I overdid it on Thursday night and had slightly sore knees yesterday. It's nice knowing the pain is from too much exercise, though, rather than being caused by my excess weight.

Has your doctor indicated that taking the weight off might help with the back pain and frequency of your spinal epidurals? Either way, I hope it helps!!

Good luck!!

I have been in and out of physical therapy since November. My MRI indicates that I have bulging disks pressing on my spine as well as multiple disks that have extreme degeneration. The doc said apart from shots, massage and surgery, weight loss as well as strengthening the muscles that support my neck and spine are the only way I can get some relief. I am inclined to believe this, because this first 30lbs has shown me a WORLD of difference