Just wondering what misconceptions, misunderstandings, etc. people who know you are banded have? Here are some of the questions/comments I've received (I tell everyone it comes up with that I'm banded).

Yeah but since the band is inside you, you have to have another operation each time it needs to be tightened, right?

I've always heard those make you sterile...

Doesn't it get absorbed by your stomach and just force your whole stomach into a smaller shape?

You can only eat a couple pounds of food a day right?

What ones have you received?

Carlene - mine is a similar one...

This from my primary care physician no less...

"So you lost 100lbs in a year and your health is great. Surely by now you've figured out how to eat, so you'll have it taken out, right?"

I was like "um....my plan is to keep it forever"

And then from a RNY patient at the "support" group meeting. "Oh..." < sad face > "it's too bad you didn't get the permanent solution" < I feel sorry for you face >

I just laughed.

Here's one I couldn't believe:

"So, I heard the band is made so you wouldn't digest all your food & it makes you throw up. Isn't it easier to just be a bulimic?"

"Didn't you have weight loss surgery 3 months ago? I thought you would have lost more weight by now!!"

I have a hard time controlling myself when I hear these things. I just want to tell them all to shut up!!

How much can they blow the balloon up before it pops?

Is it easier to stay afloat when swimming with the balloon blown up?

Does your stomach bloat out when they blow the balloon up?

Oh my GOD I just lost it here at work! HAHAHAHAHA! That's so classic!

People freak out when they hear the word "port" and think I have this device strapped to my side for the rest of my life. Then they get freaked at the thought of it being under your skin... like having your insides rearranged and a bunch of usless stomach and intestine hanging in there isn't freaky??

I also get people thinking that my stomach has been removed or something and I have a balloon in there that the food goes into. They only listen to key words and ignore the rest.

I am virtually at goal, so what I get most often is, "Are you going to have it taken out now, so you don't starve to death"?

Like there would ever be a time when I was in danger of starving to death.....PLEASE.

:heh:

Thats funny!

Ok so some I've gotten.

• my mother in law EVERYDAY "so how much weight have you lost today?"
  
• my mother after seeing me 3 months after surgery "shouldn't you be skinny by now?"
  
• don't you need another surgery so they can adjust it?

Mostly everyone who knows I have had the surgery expects to see miraculous results and even though I've only been banded 3 months they all keep looking at me in disappointment when they can't see a huge difference as if since I had the surgery I should now be skinny. :huytsao The only person who understands is my grandfather he keeps saying..a lb or 2 a month is good progress don't push yourself, don't lose to fast etc. lol. I think he's afraid I'll lose to much and get too skinny...as if!:guess

I had a few people think the port would be outside and visible too - like a colostomy bag or something.

These are hilarious. Thanks for posting!

These are great!

I get the "shouldn't you have lost more weight by now" too :alien

I have a lot of people tell me they could never get a lapband because they can't stand throwing up all the time. I tell them "I don't throw up all the time!!!! But sometimes I do produce a lot of slime!" ... then they really get grossed out!!

OMG! Some of these are hysterical! But...they all reinforce my decision to tell my husband and nobody else!

I am really tired of people asking me if I am Ok when I start having "issues" as I call them. I have thrown my fork across the room, pushed my chair back, I am holding on to the table so tight my knuckels are white, my eyes are beginning to water and turn red, I have taken a deep breath and trying to hold it as long as I possibly can....and you want me to tell you whether or not I am OK! Do I look OK? SHUT UP and Give me your napkin now before I spew you with slim!

LOL well some of these are quite amusing. BUT this just makes me feel extremely happy that I only told my husband about my surgery. I didn't want to deal with the bull shit nor the stupid ass questions. But, mainly.. i really didn't want people to babysit me and lean over my shoulder watching my every move or shall i say.. every bite. LOL

Keep up the laughs.. some of these are great.

I was just banded on Monday and it didn't occur to me that my openness with coworkers, family and friends might come back to bite me later. But I'm prepared! My oldest son is adopted and my second son is biological. There have been countless stupid comments and questions. I know they're not band related (I'm sure I'll have those to recount later) but just for your reading amusement here is my favorite of all time - probably because it's one of the few times I was thinking quick enough to offer a good comeback.

An interior decorator is standing in my kitchen. She sees a picture of my oldest son with another woman and two other boys. She asks me if that's my sister. I tell her nope, that's my son's birthmother and brothers. She looks at it for a minute and says, "What happened? Was it just a one night stand or was she sleeping around a lot?"

Silence for a minute while I ponder the incredible stupidity and insensitivity of this question. Then I ask...

"How many children did you say you have? Three? And did you conceive all of them in the missionary position?"

Now it's her turn to be silent and she turns bright red. A couple minutes later she asks in a contrite voice, "I guess that was pretty personal wasn't it?"

"Yup, not to mention incredibley rude," I say. Then I smile and change the subject.

So I totally understand being prepared for less-than-stellar band questions. :-).

Britt

the one comment I HATE the most.......

Drum roll please.................

Are you supposed to be eating that??????

My internal reply>>> !!!!!!MIND YOUR OWN F ING BUSINESS!!!!!!!

My actual Reply>>>>> Who made you my food monitor??? Where were you before I got fat????

"you're going to have a rubberband put around your stomach??"

I actually told most folks at work. I'm very much an extravert, and they are all very supportive... kept me on my pre-op diet for sure!! We'll see how that works out in the long-run though.

Tim

um my favorite is......"Katrina, are you trying to be anorexic? You don't need to lose weight, you are a cute thick girl". No one knows, and correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't associate 'thick' as a favorable adjective. Am I trying to be anorexic? Please. I don't have remotely the willpower to torture myself like that. I paid mucho dinero to electively control my intake. I swear, some people are sooooooooooooooo special.