So I meet my surgeon today (who is a cutie pie btw) and after my appointment he sends me in to fill out some paperwork with a secretary. She immediately starts in on "I was going to have the surgery, but I lost 27 lbs on my own soooo" and then begins to tell me it isn't a magic fix. Afterwards, she gave me what I call the "fat talk". This includes things such as, you just need to exercise more along with about 15-20 minutes of dietary advice (which varies from person to person). I stayed cordial because I have heard the "fat talk" more times in my life than I can count. However, my husband started to get really pissed (he has heard me refer to it, but never actually heard it before). On my way home it occurred to me that the only people I have ever gotten that advice from are overweight people. A naturally skinny person has never told me "I just think of it as a lifestyle change, not a diet". I am actually pretty unhappy with her holier than thou attitude, but this was a great example for my husband. He never understood why I told him I didn't really want anyone but a small few to know about my surgery. This would be why. I hope it is the last "fat talk" I ever get. It am a bit tweeked, but I choose to take it as a reminder of one of the multitude of reasons I am getting this surgery done.

Ignore her! After the surgery, you will lose so much weight that she will be a memory, just like your weight!

I am 5 months post surgery and people are all over me asking me "how did you do it?"...I smile and say hard work, lots of exersize and a lifestyle change and leave it at that! UNLESS I know a person has really been struggeling with weight and may be thinking about surgery, then I will quietly give them a refferal to my Bariatric program and the name of my Dr....

I'm appalled that the secretary for a WLS surgeon would be having this conversation with his patients!! It's almost like she's trying to talk her boss' patients out of having her boss operate on them! Even worse, she's in a position to make every one of his patients feel bad about their decision. I think a chat with your surgeon is in order. He probably has no idea that she's doing this to his patients.

One of the things I love about my doctor is that he really seems to have a heart for obese people, even though he's not obese himself. His manner is always gentle and caring. I cannot imagine anyone in his office making a negative comment to a patient. Even when I've called there and asked questions that I felt stupid asking, his staff has always been kind and supportive. I know that doesn't always happen because I've been treated rudely by other staff in other offices.

I think it's especially important that a WLS surgeon have staff that is sensitive to the patient's needs. It's tough enough to choose WLS without being treated badly at the doctor's office.

I agree with Lissa. The surgeon needs to deal with this crass employee. If you feel like you could stand a battle, let him know. Otherwise, it is only a matter of time before she runs into someone like my wife who would mop the floor with her.

I use the old farmer attitude tell'widdem! It's not HER business what YOU do and she is way out of line making these long winded remarks. I forgive (and forgave) people making quick remarks but to launch into a diatribe about it is unforgivable.

Not saying you should but I've quit dealing with more than one business because of rude or incompetent help, including one neurologist who was himself an a$$ and apparently hired nothing but a$$es.

I have this look.. that says it all... I was shopping pre-surgery.. getting new jammies and things... the like just started inserting herself into my convo I was having w/ my friend... She said.. You're not having that weight loss surgery are you?? I said.. Yes, WHY??? She walked away..

You were very good to stand there... I need to be as calm as you...

Omg you so need to tell your surgeon this. Even if u email him your post

You're good. I have a big mouth, and a warped sense of justice. I would have had to tell her "I'm sorry, but I was told your job is paperwork. I already saw the surgeon, can we just get this over with???"

So I meet my surgeon today (who is a cutie pie btw) and after my appointment he sends me in to fill out some paperwork with a secretary. She immediately starts in on "I was going to have the surgery, but I lost 27 lbs on my own soooo" and then begins to tell me it isn't a magic fix. Afterwards, she gave me what I call the "fat talk". This includes things such as, you just need to exercise more along with about 15-20 minutes of dietary advice (which varies from person to person). I stayed cordial because I have heard the "fat talk" more times in my life than I can count. However, my husband started to get really pissed (he has heard me refer to it, but never actually heard it before). On my way home it occurred to me that the only people I have ever gotten that advice from are overweight people. A naturally skinny person has never told me "I just think of it as a lifestyle change, not a diet". I am actually pretty unhappy with her holier than thou attitude, but this was a great example for my husband. He never understood why I told him I didn't really want anyone but a small few to know about my surgery. This would be why. I hope it is the last "fat talk" I ever get. It am a bit tweeked, but I choose to take it as a reminder of one of the multitude of reasons I am getting this surgery done.

Ohhh Cheese!!! Why do people do this??

Anyway my suggestions for you:

#1 - Please tell your surgeon that his secretary is free willing out unwarranted diet tips. I find this highly strange that someone in a Bariatric Surgeons office feels the need to do this. In my opinion, she should know better, and if she doesn't, she needs to be found out.

#2 - If and that's a BIG IF she's still there when you've lost all your weight and she's gained all hers back with a few extra pounds, you will have the last laugh.

*hugs*

This is highly unethical for a secretary to being giving you this talk! This is not her scope of practice and could result in a law suit if not addressed (secretary). If I was you, I would call or email the doc or HR and file a compliant. How dare her treat you that way. You nor anybody else deserves this kind of treatment especially if your seeking help. She has do knowledge of you comorbities. She's just an ignorant secretary. Sorry, I just got fired up and really want to call this person and give them a piece of my mind. SHE WAS SO UNPROFESSIONAL! Actually she has caused harm to you and other patients and should be fired! That's just my professional opinion!

You're good. I have a big mouth, and a warped sense of justice. I would have had to tell her "I'm sorry, but I was told your job is paperwork. I already saw the surgeon, can we just get this over with???"

:lol: Good stuff!!

Why in the hell would a surgeon have such a non supportive employee?

OMG report her at next face to face visit with the surgeon.

I'm appalled that the secretary for a WLS surgeon would be having this conversation with his patients!! It's almost like she's trying to talk her boss' patients out of having her boss operate on them! Even worse, she's in a position to make every one of his patients feel bad about their decision. I think a chat with your surgeon is in order. He probably has no idea that she's doing this to his patients.

One of the things I love about my doctor is that he really seems to have a heart for obese people, even though he's not obese himself. His manner is always gentle and caring. I cannot imagine anyone in his office making a negative comment to a patient. Even when I've called there and asked questions that I felt stupid asking, his staff has always been kind and supportive. I know that doesn't always happen because I've been treated rudely by other staff in other offices.

I think it's especially important that a WLS surgeon have staff that is sensitive to the patient's needs. It's tough enough to choose WLS without being treated badly at the doctor's office.

I will be reporting her after my surgery. The surgeon that I am going to is a little different from the average bariatric surgeon. This is only about 10% of the surgeries he does. I am getting my surgery through military routes, so complaining has to be done through the correct channel. She is just a paper pusher, but I will see my surgeon again next week and will be mentioning her to him as well as filing the correct reports. If you want to get something done as a miltiary wife, yelling and screaming gets no one anywhere. You just have to know the right people I wanted to vent because sometimes the way you need to handle things around here is frustrating, but she is about to have serious problems for acting like a personal dietician.

In a way, I really am glad this happened. Don't worry all, it will be effectively handled, it just takes a little while when going through the proper channels. However, as I stated above, my husband always looked confused when I told him about the "fat talk". I wanted him to see it. I am was P.O'ed at her attitude, but I got something out of it and she is going to learn an important lesson before she causes issues with a less assertive person.

Tried to put posts together and delete this box. No luck