I work with a bunch of men - as the only woman salesperson in an auto dealership, I see it all. The other day I wrote this while thinking about some of the comments and reactions we get when a "thin" girl comes in.

Overlooked

Inside I look the same

I feel the same

I smile the same

As the other women

the women the men notice

the women men talk about.

Its funny how

women of slighter build

get more attention

than women of substance.

Is the only picture men see

the one painted by flesh?

How sad

how lonely it must be

to always overlook

the beauty of character.

~~Cindy W.

06-17-2006

Wow - that is deep, in a very good way.

Loved that poem. It's soo true.

I;ve lived that and felt that my whole life - i hope you have many or even 1 person in your life that appreciates your true beauty. I'm fortunate my sweetie has loved me the same no matter what my size. thanks for sharing that!

I;ve lived that and felt that my whole life - i hope you have many or even 1 person in your life that appreciates your true beauty. I'm fortunate my sweetie has loved me the same no matter what my size. thanks for sharing that!

Yes - My husband loves me - regardless of my size and for that I'm very grateful.

It just frustrates me that some people literally 'overlook' people who are heavy. I think the words in this latest creation really say EXACTLY what I feel....

Since I've decided on the lap band -- I've noticed I have different feelings toward all builds right now - I appreciate the women with thin, beautiful, healthy bods and I feel connected with women who have a larger build too - like me! I guess its like when you think you might be pregnant, you start seeing pregnant woman everywhere....:confused:

I feel the need to defend the male species and point out that women...are just as guilty.

Brad Pitt......or Larry the Cable Guy?

Which makes you swoon?

:heh: :confused:

I agree with you - it goes both ways. doesn't even have to be the opposite sex, woman treat women poorly or pre-judge all the time.

Ok i guess i agree too BUT i can relate over 30 harsh, mean, cruel things men have said to me since i was pre teen and i honestly have NEVER said or heard any of my friends say anything about a guy's size - yeah maybe we wouldn't swoon over the cable guy (i don't know who that is tho) but we wouldn't call him thunder thighs, cute face but ugly body, shamoo, and Ill just stop there cuz i'm sure it happens both ways!

I work with a bunch of men - as the only woman salesperson in an auto dealership, I see it all. The other day I wrote this while thinking about some of the comments and reactions we get when a "thin" girl comes in.

I know your world. I have sold new cars for 2 different dealerships during my working years....now a SAHM. BTW, I loved the poem and it's so true. I sold Cadillac & Olds in FL and then I sold Chevy & Hyundai in OH. I LOVED it and wasn't a bit intimidated by the guys. I loved showing them up. I had only been at the dealership in OH for 2 wks and was awarded the Highest Commission of the week. You should have seen those guys. It was great. I love the auto world, but it takes so much time from your personal life. If it wasn't for that aspect, I would be doing it now, it's such a rush.

Most men at dealerships are pigs with a few sweeties thrown into the mix. So how many guys do you work with? How long have you been selling? You go girl and show them your stuff......sell your panties off and get those HUGE commissions!!! :dance:

In the 70's, I was a newly divorced mom of twin sons. I decided to sell Motor Homes, and was the only licensed salesWOman in the State of California. I made a ton of money, and all those old guys drinking their coffee and smoking their cigarettes - HATED my aggresive attitude about sales. They also hated my name on the board for Salesperson of the Month - for a long time. I was heavy, but it never got in my way. We big gals usually have some personality, and that always throws people off.

Name calling is a part of our society for EVERYTHING. Tall, short, fat, thin, big nose, glasses, big ears, teeth, gay, straight, white, black, mexican, muslim, hair, no hair, it's all fair game. People are insecure. The only way for some people to deal with all that crap is to make fun of it, but in the process - it's painful for those who get the attention. Sad really, and it starts in Kindegarten.

Women can actually do almost everything men can, we can compete in the work force that was normally male controlled. Most men don't like it, unless the package is picture perfect - with big boobs and long legs.

Life, is hard.

I love the title to this thread. Overlooked. It's so sad because I'm me inside, even though the outside was so horrid for me to see, I wanted to be overlooked. In the shadows. Unnoticed. It's a terrible place to be, and very lonely. It was for me. I'm slowly getting back to me. It really is a transition. Thanks for that Cindy.

Ok i guess i agree too BUT i can relate over 30 harsh, mean, cruel things men have said to me since i was pre teen and i honestly have NEVER said or heard any of my friends say anything about a guy's size - yeah maybe we wouldn't swoon over the cable guy (i don't know who that is tho) but we wouldn't call him thunder thighs, cute face but ugly body, shamoo, and Ill just stop there cuz i'm sure it happens both ways!

Gotta disagree here. Have INDEED heard women comment on men in this way.

It is a two way street, and womnen can be just as cruel as men. Sometimes more so, as they are very critical of each other.

I find that men will blurt things out but women will stare you up and down, whisper to each other and give you nasty looks. I honestly don't know which is worse since I've been judged by both sides. Either way, it hurts. People will never learn until they have walked in your shoes......... to bad.

btw, I worked in a cadillac dealership for 5 years, all men, 3 women...... never cussed so much in my life ROFL !

So how many guys do you work with? How long have you been selling? :dance:

I work with a lot of men overall - but only about 12 in the sales department. Most of them are very nice - but they are just "guys" (sorry). I've been in auto sales for just over 3 years. I do love it too....

I love the title to this thread. Overlooked. It's so sad because I'm me inside, even though the outside was so horrid for me to see, I wanted to be overlooked. In the shadows. Unnoticed. It's a terrible place to be, and very lonely. It was for me. I'm slowly getting back to me. It really is a transition. Thanks for that Cindy.

I feel "overlooked" because of my size but its not where I WANT to be. I want to be noticed for the me thats inside - the same me that will be here when I lose the weight - The men are in for a surprise! I'm glad you enjoyed the poem.

I get SOOO frustrated because every person feels insecurity. Even the tiny thin little girls feel it. So if we ALL get down on ourselves...why are we so mean to each other? I have never understood this human condition. Bugs me.

As a big girl still, I see what you mean about being overlooked. It was real bad 100lbs ago.

I've often wondered if it wasn't about how a heavy person carries themselves? I know when I was damn near 300 lbs, I looked down, felt uncomfortable and wouldn't look people in the eyes because I was ashamed. As I've been losing weight I hold my head high and look people square in the eye now. I mean, I'm still the better part of 200 lbs but I FEEL good so I get treated better.

I think it's both how people view obese people. But it's also about how obese people view themselves.

I know that whatever mental tapes run in your head help shape your reality.