This is a tough topic but I need to talk about it. I am being sleeved on the 24th. I am having the hardest time leaving my children. I am scared that I might die and leave them. I am trying not to dwell too much on this but I know that with any surgery death could happen. I don't feel like I have more of a chance dying being sleeved, it's just that I could die. I could even die on the plane but for some reason that doesn't scare me as much. I think this is even more on my mind because I am going to Mexico and I will be so far away from them, I live in WI.

I was wondering how you all are dealing/dealt with this?

I was thinking of writing a letter to each of my 3 children and my husband just in case something does happen. But then I think maybe that is too much and I am making a big deal about this. Then again, I am not telling my 2 younger sons I think about how upset they would be if something did happen and I didn't tell them anything.

Thoughts??

You're going to be in great hands with Dr. Aceves & I echo crosswind in saying you are NOT going to die on the table. He is a great surgeon with many, many VSG operations under his belt and his experience will pay off for you in the long run.

I thought about writing a letter to my children (10 and 7) only because I was worried about my plane crashing. I didn't have one ounce of fear about undergoing surgery. Not a single, solitary bit and this from a woman who lost her dad on the surgical table 7 years ago. He was very sick with heart disease and the operation was extremely risky and we expected complications anyway, but it still leaves a scar. I admit, the first surgery I had after he died scared the crap out of me because I was worried I would never wake up, too, but the happy juice/pill you get really does make you not care. I've had 5 more surgeries since then and the VSG was by far the easiest and least worrisome for me.

Congrats on your surgery!

Thanks! I am feeling a little more at ease after reading everyone's responses! It's funny bc the only fear I have about the surgery if I don't come back for my kids. Other than that nothing scares me about it.

I am sorry about what happened to your dad. Thanks for sharing your story.

Yes if writing a letter gives you some peace of mind do it. I am single no children. I did a living will to make sure my practical efficient nurse cousin didn't pull the plug too soon. I made another cousin the "decider". Hehe. But I made it through in great shape age 62 and BMI of 60. Sounds more like fear of the unknown than fear of surgery per se. Crosswind is right about the very low risk of any complication. If I made it through find at my age and weight, you will too. Wish you peace of mind.

Roseib, thanks for your reply! Wow, that is amazing how wonderful you did with your surgery and your results!

This post brought tears to my eyes. I am struggling with the same feelings. My 3 teenage kids know I'm having surgery and are excited for me. My 7 year old is excited as well...her words "I want to have a healthy mama, but I love you no matter what." I have a 3 year old and the thought of something happening to me terrifies me. I've had several surgeries, some pre-kids and of course I had anxiety, but somehow having children ampliflies that fear of something happening. I had thyroid surgery last summer and went through these feelings, so I should be over it by now.

Know you are not alone in feeling this way. Having this surgery is a huge change in our lives but its one that will be such a wonderful gift to ourselves and our kids.

Hugs

Leanne

Imawhodat, this is my first surgery ever. I have only told our 20 year old daughter. I decided against telling the 11 and 8 year old until I get home. My 8 year old will worry about me the whole time and has been talking about dying so much lately. I know it's just his age and that fear is normal for him at that age but I don't want him to have to have any concern about me while I am gone.

I, too, am so excited about the change this surgery will bring to my life. I cannot wait!

I wrote letters a couple of years ago before my first business trip after my daughter was born. I keep them with my will in our safe. Having those letters gave me a sense a peace before this surgery. I will warn you though that I just about bawled my eyes out when I wrote those letters and I wasn't near as emotional back then as I was right before my surgery. So, be warned that the letter writing, while cathartic just might wring you out emotionally! Best wishes!

Amanda

Amanda, thanks for your thoughts. Since I have been reading what everyone has to say I have even started thinking that it would be good to have letter written just because. I could die at any time and I know that there are much greater chances of my dying doing every day things than there are having surgery! The letter would be a nice thing for the kids to have if I ever die! It's just so morbid to think about. Thanks for your thoughts!