Well I passed my Psych evaluation yesterday. I also started the three month diet and exercise program. So Now I wait for three months and then I am scheduled for surgery. I called my friend who had the bypass in late December hoping she would be a good support source and she was totally negative. She has had complications but should be accountable for some of them. First i think she rushed into surgery and decided to have the procedure that she could loose the most weight on. Second, I dont think she told the truth about her medical history as she has had several surgeries from previous accidents and has needed and steroroids. That is why she was big to begin with and she slound not have has the bypass with that history. So now she had the bypass, and then got her gall bladder out and they just told her she needs to have her pouch made larger. She called me begging me to leave my nutrition appoinment and not to get this done saying I dont need it. That her hair is falling out in handfuls and she is so weak all the time and regrets her choice. I was so mad! I feel like if she would drink the water, eat the right foods, exercise, and take her suppliments she would feel differently. She has lost almost 100 pounds and isnt complaining about that! I dont care if she cant eat chipoltle anymore..we shouldnt eat that anyway. I am not doing this to be skinny! Is is not an easy out for me!This is for my lasting health! My dad died at 50 years old. i do not want the same fat and thats my motivation for this. i also hold myself accountable for my failures as well as my successes and I feel like those who don't should not be on here or in the community dissing people who are considering WLS. I care about my friend but she is not helping herself by eating the same crap foods and not drinking water. I advised her she needs to get her vitamins in some how and she just said they are gross and she refused to take them. So i feel like its your choice just like this is mine, just dont discourage me because you arent taking advantage of this...SHHHHHEWW!! That is off my chest now!

I say ignore them. i have a friend at work who I talk to on a daily basis. She had the bypass almost 3 years ago and has lost 100lbs and has kept it off. She gives me support as well as suggestions for my eating patterns adn for getting my hubby to accept that I am having the surgery. There is also someone who had the band at the school I work in. She had the surgery right before school started. In all honesty, you can't tell that she had it at all. I have lost more weight than she has and all I did was watch my food intake.

My suggestion is to ignore the negative. if you feel that you want this surgery, that it will work for you... go for it. This is your body, your choice. Be honest with your doctor and yourself. Go into it saying I will heal amazing, I will do amazing and I will look and feel amazing!

Hi Everyone,

Ok so i approached my friend and just suggested that we help each other and be each others support system since we both will have simular experiences. I also advised her that I have done my research and my decision is solid. That if for some reason my insurance denied me, I will just pay out of pocket. That is how set on this I am. I shared with her my food diary and actually even disclosed my weight. My partner doesnt even know how much I weigh! I showed her how she can tweek things to work for her and how she could just track this on her phone even. I also showed her my book from my nutritionist who specializes in working with WLS patients. It had a section devoted to RNY. I don't think she had any education before she had her procedure so i thought it would be helpful. Well I think she soaked in all the information I share, but she still came at me negatively. She said people at the bariatric place she had her surgery told her all kind of horror stories about the sleeve. That I should not do this and just give myself a year. So i pulled up my surgeons information and showed her how he has the highesr designation available in this field. i also told her that he has never had a patient have a leak with the sleeve. I explained how I am in fairly good health despite my weight and how I didnt have any co-mobidities and didnt even need any additional testing or anything. I also explained my father and his death at a pre-mature age and how I didnt want that to happen to me. So i feel like I layed my case out but she was just negative. I finally snapped and explained.. look I am having a different procedure and I am not taking any shortcuts. I also am doing my part unlike you. I told her that WLS is not a cure its a tool and she has to do her part. I told her maybe she wouldnt get sick all the time if she catually did not drink while she was eating and just followed the diet somewhat. That she needed to hold herself accountable and stop thinking that the surgery is magic. So I basically told her she needed to step up and stop hating on me because of her experience. She was very upset at first but then she owned some things about her situation. She confessed how her family continues to eat the same stuff and she feels more like an outcast now tha before. I suggested that she let her family know that she needed thier support and that includes cnging the way meals are done. She has a daughter that is big and she can help her avoid getting to the point that she needs the help of WLS. So all in all it was like an up and down roller coaster and I thought we were gonna end up ending our friendship a couple times. However, I think she understands what I was saying and that my offer to be WLS buddies comes from a genuine place. Hopefully things will get better for her, but i wanted to thank everyone for the support and comments. It is appreciated.

That is a really great outcome. I commend you for holding it together, you really have a lot to be proud of. I do believe she only meant the best for you and cares about you. Lots of relationships will change for you in your journey, some for the better some for the worse. My hope is that this one will be for the better. Both of you have a lot to lose, and a lot to gain in return by remaining friends.

Blessings!