My Back went out
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I feel like I have made so much progress working towards that golden moment of getting a surgery date- I have been to the nutritionist and she is seeing me in two weeks instead of a month in order to help me try to get the surgery in April- I have so many different appointments I have put them on my phone to keep them straight- a sleep study Monday night from which I head to an Upper GI the next morning, , followed by a treadmill test the next day.... and the psych eval the following week. Even a colonoscopy as I am due for that and my dr. wants me to have it done before the surgery. None of it phases me with my wonderful goal of getting my sleeve.
Then- kaboom- my lower back went out. I am already bedeviled with back and knee issues along with fibromyalgia that are a huge reason why I am bound for the surgery. I need to lose weight to ease things for my body but the injuries keep me from being able to lose - you know the vicious cycle! I am on pain medication, even a patch, and am use to living with pain, and relying on the magical Water aerobics to keep me moving and ease my pain. But this is different- it feels like a disc problem and I am bedridden and in agony. So now I have an MRI in the middle of all these other tests to see if I have something that needs surgery. Something is wrong, I know it. And my doctor thinks so too.
I am terrified- for one thing the back surgery I had eight years ago precipitated a 120 pound weight gain when I went from being active and alive to being incapactated and eating for comfort. My inactivity is already an issue in my ability to lose but the thought I might need surgery again when I am working so hard to get my sleeve and go for life is completely freaking me out.
I told my husband last night that I am thinking of insisting on having my sleeve first even if I do have surgery. Then at least I would have a limited capacity for food and would have my sleeve eating habits . I will try to get it moved forward based on this urgent situation of needing back surgery- so that I can recover for two or three weeks and then once I am moving well and able to have surgery again THEN I would do the back surgery.
Just think good thoughts for me everyone! I just can't stand getting so close to getting all my ducks in a row only to have something take the rug out from under me. Sigh.