I am new to this site and can not thank everyone for all the fantastic post. That is what has made my final decision to go for the sleeve instead of the band. I am self pay and had to beg my husband to help get the money. To me I am worth it. He is more worried about me getting skinny and finding someone else. Anyone heard that one before? My surgery date is Nov 19. I look forward to lots of support on this site. Thanks and pray for me. :001_tongue:

Hi and welcome to the board. Congrats on your date, and can't wait to hear about your progress.

My husband was a little insecure about me losing weight, and "finding" someone else. After talking about it in depth, and him realizing that I was truthfully doing this to better myself, extend my life, and lose weight so I could conceive and carry a baby to term, he realized I wasn't going to leave him just because I lost weight. I made sure to tell my husband that my pant size did not define me as a woman, and that regardless of my size, I was still the same person he married. Now that I am 4.5 months out from my revision, and 84lbs smaller, he absolutely loves my confidence, our sex life was always good, but now it's pretty phenomenal, I don't get tired when we go out running errands, or shopping. He's seeing the benefits, and that I haven't changed except for the better.

MONA, well doesn't your story sound all too familiar. . .I think the majority of the husbands, including mine, are so worried about the skinny us going off to find someone else. . . it's just the insecurity issues they have. . . maybe a bit jealous cause now men will be actually looking at us and maybe talking to us. . . men are nutty that way. . as far as mine goes I just laugh at him and carry on doing what I am doing. . . he is weird that way (I haven't even been sleeved yet, but we are 19 years apart, he's older) we have been married 30 years I always tell him why in the world would I go out, get someone new to re-train, that is way too much work. . . heavens be! Mine supports me because he is worried about my health, he says he wants me around for some time. . he is so funny gotta love him! Good luck Mona! You'll be so cute and your hubbie will love you tons!

Mona -

Welcome to VST and congratulations on getting your surgery date. I think men are much more insecure than they let on to be. my man, Bearded (who posts here occassionally) solved the problem of me getting skinny and possibly leaving him ... he had the sleeve 1 month after me and now we're getting skinny together. He just said tonight he's so glad we did/are doing this together and so am I. He loves it when men look at me and he can show I "belong" to him ... continue to assure your husband, as Tiff has done, that your outer body will change, but inside you're still the same woman.

You are worth it! And tell your husband that you need to lose weight for your health! Its not about looks, its about getting your health back.

Best wishes,

Congratulations on your surgery date! I have learned, and continue to learn, so much from this place both pre and post op.

You've gotten some good advice/words of wisdom from others on here in regards to your husband. Good luck!

Things are rolling very fast. Just this week got my surgery date. Today I have my next 3 weeks planned out. Monday I take off for Pre operative test. Nov. 16 Is pre admission and consent day with Dr. Avara and then Nov. 19 is the day. Less than a month... I am never one to miss work but this is soooo important to me. How much recovery time do you guys think I will actually need?:thumbup:

What time of job do you have? I have a desk job mainly and was off for a week, although could have gone back sooner except for intestinal issues that made me feel as though I should stay close to home (and the bathroom).

I am a teacher. But under the conditions they will let me sit if I need after surgery. I will have 9 days off with Thanksgiving break. Do you think that will give me enough time?

I am a teacher. But under the conditions they will let me sit if I need after surgery. I will have 9 days off with Thanksgiving break. Do you think that will give me enough time?

Oh yes, I would think 9 days off would be plenty of time, but everyone is different - however, if they allow you to sit, then you should be fine. You might be a little tired, however you should be able to make it through the day.

I took off two weeks. It was enough time for me. Some take less.

What time of job do you have? I have a desk job mainly and was off for a week, although could have gone back sooner except for intestinal issues that made me feel as though I should stay close to home (and the bathroom).

I had some intestinal issues too and was glad to be off those two weeks. By the time I went back to work that was all resolved. It was a bit more fatigued than usual by the end of my shift. Probably could have used another week but I made it and feel back to normal now, at one month. the first two weeks the diet is so restricted I think that made me more fatigued...then the fact that you've had major surgery, anesthesia, etc. the body needs time to heal a bit.

I'd have gone totally stir-crazy if I had been off two weeks ... I was that way after 1 week - I had surgery on Friday and planned to go back on Wed., but ended up taking Wed/Thurs off and going back on Friday. That gave me the opportunity to get my desk cleaned off and then the weekend to rest - I was fine by Monday - but as you said, tired by the end of the day. Everyone is different.

I am a teacher as well and I think I could have gone back with the time frame you mentioned. As others have mentioned, you may be very fatigued. I don't know about your situation/level, but I'd make sure that you're not scheduled for any extra duties besides teaching your classes (morning, bus, lunch, etc.) for the first couple of weeks after you return. Maybe even talk to administration about being excused from any extra meetings for a week or two so that you can use any time during the work day to keep up with your classes (planning, assessing, cleaning) because you will probably not feel like working a minute longer than your scheduled work day to keep up with these things.