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What was I thinking?

What was I thinking:confused: ? Now that I am up for being banded I regret telling people at school. I go to school for hair and it's a smaller school. I love almost all the girls there. it's like a family and we all know each others life stories. problem is I made a choice not to tell my family except for my mother. But at school I was talking with a couple girls and more started to pop up and ask questions:eek: . I am proud of the fact I want the band. I just don't want my family to worry and give me a hard time so I decided against telling them. but of course now everyone at school knows. they are all very positive and excited for me. but now I am worried that they are going to think I will be dropping weight like with a the gb. They are all thin I am the big girl of the school and I don't think they know the difference between the procedures. I feel silly worring about this but as of 8 weeks to my surgery the questions are just flying at me from everyone:faint: . has anyone told people they work with? And how did it work out for you. thanks all for reading my silly rant.

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I just got back from telling a couple more friends. They asked how the weightloss was going... I told them it was slow & would be staying slow... and that sometime next year they would be able to tell a difference. ;)

They laughed, lol, but I'm serious!

I have a big mouth and told many. And have told alot more since. I have also met with many people who are/did get the band. I want to help others make the decision.

My band has helped change my life. There are many things I am doing that I couldn't do when I was heavier. I want everyone to feel free to achieve their dreams.

I have other family members that have had GB and one with the band. I don't feel like I have to justify my slow loss. I like it. I get to buy some cute clothes and wear them for awhile. And the end of the seasons, I have been buying skirts for $1 and $2, blazers for $7, etc. Then all of the sudden, I drop another size or so and look different and skinnier. I am old enough that I need to lose slow to reduce wrinkles.

Have I ever wished I hadn't share - yes - but then I think, what if telling helps others get the band and improves their life. Isn't that worth it? I want to say getting the band is all about me but now I think its a process that helped me and makes me want to help others. Do the questions ever but me - yes but so would dying young.

When people think I"m losing slow, I also explain that I am losing slower, its healthier for me, I will have less wrinkles, I am absorbing my food and the nutritients, I have a life time tool to help me (instead of a short window to lose), and psychologically, the slower loss, is easier for me to adjust to - I still don't always recognize me in a mirror.

Yes, telling has a price but its like giving a gift or volunteering, the rewards can be better than the price. Good luck in your efforts. Celeste

My husband is my greatest support. And, I told my children, parents and one lady that I work with. For now, I think they are all I plan to tell. Like some of the other posters, I hate feeling like I am under a microscope and that everyone is watching my every bite and expecting a weekly report on how much I have lost. Maybe, as time goes on, I will share my story with others. Especially some of my other friends that are overweight and could benefit from this. Of course, I have not been banded yet, so my plan may change once I am doing the liquid diet and start dropping pounds, lol.

I am pre op and am set for the 17th cant wait, I tell everyone I know and it has been grt. To see all the people who ask the questions and why. This just makes me know that I have made the right decision and I have a mountain of support.

I say yes be excited about it.

I have told people that have asked, I am proud to be banded and what it has helped me accomplish. It's me that has to understand that it is slow going. And just because you have a bad week or day to not give up and continue pushing yourselve. I am a supervisor in a plant of over 300 people and everyone has seemed to notice that I have lost alot of weight, I tell them I excersize everyday and that is what is helping. I had a cousin call me from out of the blue and she said her nephew who works with me said I was looking like Raquel Welch boy did that feel good.;) I think when people notice it encourages you to continue on the right path. I told her what I had done and she is looking into it. I feel now I want to tell these people who are struggling with their weight that there is help out there. I want everyone to feel good about themselves.:clap2:

I am usually an open book with everything in my life....good or bad. But for some reason, I don't feel comfortable with telling people about my band. It is almost like it is TABU or something. I don't mind telling them I am on a liquid diet. Of course most people think fad diet, it won't last...that is what I would think or "She must be crazy". So, I guess I would rather people think I'm crazy, then to think I was lazy or vain enough to resort to obesity surgery. Why do I think I have to justify or explain my actions? I am almost 45 years old! I can do or not do whatever I want. I am in control, so I can choose not to tell whomever I don't want to know and don't need a reason. Good for me!

Wait a minute...my best friend told my mother after I told her I was not going to tell her. I am not in control of my life! If she would tell my mother, she would tell anyone and everyone she meets...and this girl gets around. My mother, OMG, everyone in North Texas knows now. I am having Deja Vu. When I found out I was pregnant with my first child, I knew the right person to tell so I wouldn't have to call anyone else...gossip spreads faster then email. I can relax now, because everyone I know now knows my secret.

I hope they all know that they aren't suppose to know and don't tell me.

What were we talking about?

I didn't plan on telling ANYONE about my surgery, but my big mouth betrayed me once I got closer to the surgery. What can I say, I just got too darn excited. I don't necessarily regret telling them and they have been very discrete to my face (I'm sure the entire office knows by now). The only problem I had was when I started having problems. I was very sick for several months. I thought it was the band. My band doctor told me it was the band and I was having esophageal spasms. I was desperate for some relief from the pain that I was having. It was so intermittant and so unpredictable. So I confided in a co-worker my frustrations and how I was logging absolutely EVERYTHING I was eating in hopes to figure out what the problem was. To figure out what I was doing wrong. Her question to me.......and it still bothers me to this day.........."what did you have surgery for if you have to keep track of everything you eat anyway?" I was devestated. I was speechless. She's always been the one rooting for me, telling me how great I'm doing and how wonderful I look. Then to question me like this. I now have a good come back for her, but then I didn't. I was stunned, caught off guard.

When the problem I was having turned out to be my gall bladder instead of anything to do with the band, we all sighed a big sigh of relief AND looked back on those logs to see a pattern of what was causing the attacks.

So, long story short.......tread lightly with those you've told. Be their teacher. You've already indicated that they may not understand the differences between GB and lap band, so teach them that there are alternatives out there. AND, by all means, set boundaries. If you don't want to be constantly nagged about your progress or what your dietary limitations are, tell them. I work with 2 GB post ops who have gained almost all their weight back. The entire female section of the office whispers behind their back at how "aweful" their dietary practices are and "serves them right" for eating the junk that they do. Or better yet..."she had that horrid surgery and now look at her".

I wish you all the strength and luck in the world.

I didn't tell anyone except those close to me about my surgery untill I got it. I didn't tell my Dad or my step mom till after I had it done. I was afraid of what they would say. My Dad was supportive and wanted to know more and my Step mom the fitness nut was not as supportive and thought that I could have done it myself with some disapline. I have a portion control problem and that is why I got the band. She was ok with it and stpped harping on me quickly though. Every one else that I told was supportive. I have told a lot of my class mates and co workers and they are all very supportive. I am proud of my band and I am very ok with talking about it because not many people around my town do not know about it. I actually gave the info to a class mate who is going to talk to her doc about it. So, I guess I am trying to increase awareness too. I really wasn't going to tell anyone and now I tell everyone but I am adamate I am not telling my mother or her side of the family, they just don't need to know, LOL. (Long story)

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I know what you mean I am not telling anyone in my family except for my mother. long story as well lol. Maryb that post was cute. it's amazing how big ones mouth can get:D . also ddiedre I know what you mean about how your mouth can betray you. That happens to me all the time. My brain is screaming SHUT UP!;) but my mouth is yack, yack, yackedy yack. and isn't it always three days later when you figure out a comeback and you are thinking take that! but they can't take it because it's over with:confused: . keep your comeback in your brain log it will come in handy eventually;) . lol.

Ok, I wasn't going to tell a lot of people I went to school with, but well, when I got out of surgery, my husband called one gal and she spilled the beans to everyone. Of course I can't keep my big trap shut...

I TOTALLY wish I hadn't told so many people. I didn't tell anyone at work but my entire FAMILY knows about it and I feel like they're watching me like a hawk! Got into a big fight with my mom the other day because she was like, "gosh honey, I'm so depressed because when I saw you it looked like you hadn't lost anything at all."

I wanted to strangle her.

She (and most people) didn't really understand that you don't lose much weight until AFTER you get a good fill! So, here I was a couple months post-surgery and not showing any drastic weight loss... well, I know that's normal, and all my bandster friends here know that's normal... but everyone ELSE does not!

The good news is that I got filled to 2.0cc's the other day and I'm finally feeling restriction! HAve lost 6 pounds in two weeks so I'm feeling pretty good now. Good luck!!!!

  • Author

I know what you mean. I am not in the mood for people saying you only lost 5 lbs. expecting you to drop 20lbs in a month. I chose this band so I could have something to work with. I am not expecting a miracle. but others can't understand that. Congrats on the fill and the loss. your picture is very pretty. good luck.

I wish I hadn't told anyone. Everyone always thinks they are trying to be helpful and thougtful when asking, "how much have you lost now?" I hate that question. I haven't lost anything in 2 months and I feel like people are looking at me going what happened? Didn't she have surgery to lose weight and she is still fat!? Just my own personal issues, but If I could go back and do it over again I wouldn't have told anyone!

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