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Is The Party Over?

Hey guys,

I'm new here. Getting banded in September. What do you guys do on a "guys" night with your buddies? Usually ends up eating too much and drinking too much. How do you handle this? Do you tell your friends, or just take the "abuse" when they see you eating and drinking so little? Just wondering if anyone has any advice around this subject...

Same thing when going out with another couple. I really don't want to tell anyone other than family. Do you get lots of questions when not ordering in your usual "patterns"?

Thanks!

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  • I too had a similar questions about this topic. I didn't want anyone know about my surgery either because I was embarrassed and felt somewhat of a failure. It's been almost a year now since my

  • Mayasgram
    Mayasgram

    If you have friends who abuse you because you are not eating unhealthy things are they really your friends???????????????Look you just can not eat like you use to if you do you will not lose weight

  • xsentrick
    xsentrick

    Honestly my friends wouldn't give a rat's a$$ what I was doing as long as I was still fun to hang out with. Just be yourself and if they can't or don't want to understand, then maybe it's time to fin

Featured Replies

If you have friends who abuse you because you are not eating unhealthy things are they really your friends???????????????Look you just can not eat like you use to if you do you will not lose weight and you will get stuck . Maybe you should look for some new friends at the gym... running or biking. Life is going to change you need to be willing to change with it. You can make up some story or you can just say Iook I am trying to get healthy and this is what I am doing . Real friends who probably think you need to do that will support you the others you do not need. Most people are sp busy living their own lifes they haven't got time to worry about yours.

  • Author
If you have friends who abuse you because you are not eating unhealthy things are they really your friends???????????????Look you just can not eat like you use to if you do you will not lose weight and you will get stuck . Maybe you should look for some new friends at the gym... running or biking. Life is going to change you need to be willing to change with it. You can make up some story or you can just say Iook I am trying to get healthy and this is what I am doing . Real friends who probably think you need to do that will support you the others you do not need. Most people are sp busy living their own lifes they haven't got time to worry about yours.

That's good advice. Thanks.

I'm a pretty social creature, so lots of girl's nights and lots of couples nights/weekends. The only time I mention being banded is if it noticeably disrupts a meal -- got stuck, got to run to the bathroom. The guys couldn't care less, the girls are somewhat interested. If no one says anything, I just go about my normal business. When I can't eat much of my meal, I joke about filling up on appetizers. I have found that nobody really pays much attention to what you're actually consuming!!!

I think it is very similar to any addiction. This for most of us is an addicton even if we don't admit it. I have decided to only go out with friends who support my choice for the surgery and who I know will try to order healthy when out with me as well then I know they are my real friends who care about my health. But I also don't go out to eat as much as I did before the band because of all the extra calories.

Honestly my friends wouldn't give a rat's a$$ what I was doing as long as I was still fun to hang out with. Just be yourself and if they can't or don't want to understand, then maybe it's time to find some more supportive friends. Welcome to the forum and I hope your journey is smooth sailing!

  • 2 weeks later...

This is a most important question about our Bad Old Habits vs recognizing WHO and WHAT led us to those decades of over consumption.

It is opportunity to face ourselves, and to learn what it takes to make Good New Habits.

Much of what we have done in the illusion of 'having a good time' really wasn't....and we carried our mistaken belief into the XXXXXL size clothing stores.

Even now after years postOp, at times I will suddenly realize my eating is approaching some form of autopilot unrelated to actual hunger.

I too grew up with the notion eating/drinking/socializing all meant OVER indulgence and license to just eat/drink till it was all gone.

Lap Band is the opportunity to learn how to train our Rational Brain so it is capable of running our Irrational Belly.

Good luck.

  • 4 weeks later...

Hi well, first of all after your band you will not be eating wings and drinking beer for some time. While Dr have different plans the first weeks and you slowly start to eat regular foods also some have a pre-op diet. Your friends will notice your weight loss etc. If they are they type to push food on you than you need new friends. The older I get the more I realize that most people are self absorbed and really are not going to be too concerned about what you eat or don't eat. If you have some Fat Eating buddies they may try to sabotage you so you do need to be careful about that.

I was out on Monday with some guy friends at a pub for dinner each had 2 beers and dinner. I had my dinner no beer and the biggest difference was when we each got our checks! Mine was a lot less! So don't worry about it and good luck.

Ross

I too had a similar questions about this topic.

I didn't want anyone know about my surgery either because I was embarrassed and felt somewhat of a failure.

It's been almost a year now since my surgery and I tell anyone and everyone that wants to know about my experience in WLS.

With sharing the info with guys at work, 3 of my co-works have had the surgery.

My priorities of life have changed on their own as I continue this journey. I have a DESIRE to do more physical things. That doesn't mean I've become a gym rat. I work around the house, installed 2,000 feet of hardwood flooring. Put a garden in that required moving 25 yards I dirt by hand. I take my dog to intense dog tarai g classes. I go to the farmers market.

Before surgery, I wouldn't even get out of my lazy boy.

I would assume some of your friends have weight issues. Be a mentor to them and get them moving and active so the do t need a surgery.

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