DH and I have a best friend (ex room mate from college) who is like a brother to us. He is the god father to our children. He means the world to us, and he is involved in our lives in many different ways. So today I was on the phone with him, Ed, and it slipped that we are going to Mexico in April.

"Mexico?? You don't have time for vacation! Whats up?"

I tell him that we are just taking a quick trip, but he knows me. He sees through me. He says "Bullshit, whats going on?"

So I dish, and I get back a whole host of mixed reactions, feeling, curses, and verbal hugs. We must have talked for over an hour about every aspect. It was like he was going through the various levels of grief. LOL I think it was a harder thing for him to accept than it was for me! It was tough, and at various points we both shed tears. He loves me, and I love him. Like I said, he is very close to DH and us like family. I am so happy that he cares this much, but it is hard to see someone express fear over your decisions. He understands, and stands behind me every step of the way, but it was an emotionally draining conversation.

Am I alone in this? Did anyone else go through this? Are we being silly?? LOL

I so need a nap now. :faint:

No, the phone call from hell would be closer to him yelling at you and giving you nothing but grief and dispair over this. Threatening emotional blackmail.

He sounds like a good friend. Go take a nap, sounds like you deserve one.

Hi, My "so-called" best friend of 18 years (since we were in 5th grade) had the nerve to tell me "I can't imagin having something foreign in my body" when she has breast implants!!!!! It made me soooo mad, but the truth of the matter is, is she does not want me to be skinny....she likes me being insecure...makes her feel superior. I need better friends don't I.

Hi, My "so-called" best friend of 18 years (since we were in 5th grade) had the nerve to tell me "I can't imagin having something foreign in my body" when she has breast implants!!!!! It made me soooo mad, but the truth of the matter is, is she does not want me to be skinny....she likes me being insecure...makes her feel superior. I need better friends don't I.

I think you answered your own question.

Stacey, yes you do!! LOL And Vines, you are right, that would have been worse. I was just so wasted after that call. I am very lucky that he is so caring, and supportive. He certainly was not happy with the idea at first, but that all stems from what he says as him "not seeing me as a fat girl". My dad would say this, but he would be like Stacey's friend...trying to keep my spirit small while making my butt bigger. LOL

I had a similar, but less emotional, conversation with my mother prior to being banded. She was very concerned, but trusts my decisions and supports me 100%.

It's great that you have a wonderful friend who is concerned about your health.

It's much easier when you have good support! Congrats!!

Hi Amy....

It's great to have people who care....and it is always important to hear differing opinions.......they can have valid points that you need to know before going into something seriuos.

Your friend might be more anxious because you are doing this in Mexico vs doing it in the USA. I too, worry about lower standards in health care outside of the USA. But the band is a mimimally invasive surgery....so you should be OK....but for the gastric bypass......I would be very sceptical of a foreign surgeon and hospital.

best wishes.....diane : )

I didn't tell anyone I didn't think could handle it, until I got back. My MIL for instance didn't find out until I'd lost over 50#... she didn't notice til then... I figured I'd tell her when she asked, but not before. I didn't want others to influence mine or my husbands decision. I knew some would express support, some genuine concern, but others might have other motives for discouraging me from losing weight.

He is better than the real family I have! LOL But I have a way to get back at him for making me so emotional. He is coming to help me move at the end of the month. I told rob it was his responsibility to force Ed to take all the heavy boxes. Make me tired, will ya? We'll just see about that.

How wonderful is he? I got flowers this morning from him. Address to his "beautiful skinny sister". The man makes me cry more than my own husband!!! And guess what girls! He's single. Line forms to the left. No pushing now.

I think it's wonderful to have great support! When I first went to be banded I was really scared but my family was there and this lady that was putting a iv in my wrist to monitor my blood-pressure during the surgery thought she had it in right and she didn't when she pulled the needle back out blood went everywhere and about the time this happen my brother was walking back to wish me luck before I went under for surgery and he got really shakey and almost started to cry because he seen all the blood....he was more scared for me than I was....lol but i really think it's good to have support and people that really care & show that they care that gives u more strength and seems to calm me down if i'm scared

My sister reacted the same way when I told her but she's been pretty supportive. Full of questions..which makes me wonder, is she next?

My call to my mom (it was 2 hours split over 2 days) was so exhausting that I waited until after I had done the surgery before I told my brother because I knew he would take it as hard as my mom did and have as many questions.

With my friends the two that have known me for 14+ years and have been with me through all the bs I have with my health and my weight think it was the best thing I could do for myself. The few that have only been around a few years gave me an enormous amount of flack.

When being verbal about the people that gave me crap one good friend made what I consider a rather astute observation.....when I am telling someone I am having life altering surgery to make it so I can't eat as much I am saying to a point that I find over-eating/binge-eating/poor-eating unnaceptable and that they may take it personally that I am saying "that" lifestyle "their" lifestyle is no longer acceptable to me, when I only find it unaceptable for "ME" and that is my goal with the surgery is to take care of "ME".

It is nice that you have such a good friend in you and your husbands life!

Skye