I don't know why I thought this was going to be a quick processed (getting approved) but I did. I have my lifestyle class today and technically I should be done after that, but of course the dr found an issue with my heart so now I have to be cleared by a cardiologist before I can have surgery and I have to have a current PAP done since I have dysplasia. It's like everytime I get close, something keeps popping up. I have a feeling that when my PAP comes back abnormal (and it will-for sure) they will tell me I have to take care of that, even though I had the LEEP procedure and it is going to take a series of tests over months to determine whether or not it eventually turns normal or I have to have another LEEP. Ahh, its just so frustrating.

And the frustration is rubbing off at home, partially because I am frustrated and partially because I am so self conscience about my weight that I am feeling down and feeling like my husband doesn't love me anymore Of course, he hasn't said or done anything to make me think that, it's just my fat brain telling me so. Ugh. And of course he has to be the cute Army recruiter that all the girls love..sigh..

I can't believe I gained this weight after my son was born in December. I was 160 before (of course still needed to lose weight but thought I looked great) and am now up to 214 just in that mere few months and I can't lose it to save my life. It's just frustrating..

Sorry, today is my off day and I'm allowed

Demander,

Of course you're entitled - we all are - we just can't let our down feelings keep us from moving forward. And don't forget to give yourself some credit -

you are doing something really good for yourself and your family. I, too, wanted the procedure right away -- started last May to get covered,

and will clear the last hurdle (yes - getting a cpap (ugh)), and schedule my surgery before the end of Oct. BUT - lots of bumps in the road -

failed stress test then angiogram (which was clear), two sleep studies (double ugh!), so things are looking up. When you're most down, remember

that you are your worst critic, and a couple months after you get this done, your downest moments may be in the distant past.

Hang in there and give yourself a break!

Im sorry to hear that you are having one of those days! It certainly does happen to all of us at some point unfortunately.With total empathy to your all too familiar dillemma I would suggest that you take something positive out of this minor speedbump in the road to your "B-day" with appreciation that you have good doctors with your best interest at heart that want to make sure you are fit for this surgery before you get the band. The risks of any sugery never seem worth the benefit if something does in fact go wrong while you're on the operating table. A weak heart is nothing to turn a blind eye to when you have a young family that I'm sure would rather have you here with them rather than just thinner. Also find some joy in that you have insurance thats willing to pay for your surgery- otherwise you wouldnt be going through so many hoops to be cleared for the surgery,as so many people wish they could be in the process of getting cleared for surgery but can't because they can't afford it. So that in itself a blessing. Try to stay positive and begin developing the mindset that you will need to have to be successful with the band, it will take a great deal of patience to see the specific results you're after even when that anticipated day comes and you are banded. Stay realistic about this whole experience- pre & post banding, so that you won't find yourself discouraged more often than not. Keep your hubby in the loop with how you feel so that he can be the support system that you need and be understanding during those times frustration gets the best of you. The people you read about who are banded after just 2 weeks and lose all their excess weight in just a few months are the exception and not the rule. This is a fairly long process for most people, but once you're to goal it will seem to have flown by! Before you know it you will be banded and well on your way!Stay motivated, inspired and excercise patience. Best of luck to you!

Im sorry to hear that you are having one of those days! It certainly does happen to all of us at some point unfortunately.With total empathy to your all too familiar dillemma I would suggest that you take something positive out of this minor speedbump in the road to your "B-day" with appreciation that you have good doctors with your best interest at heart that want to make sure you are fit for this surgery before you get the band. The risks of any sugery never seem worth the benefit if something does in fact go wrong while you're on the operating table. A weak heart is nothing to turn a blind eye to when you have a young family that I'm sure would rather have you here with them rather than just thinner. Also find some joy in that you have insurance thats willing to pay for your surgery- otherwise you wouldnt be going through so many hoops to be cleared for the surgery,as so many people wish they could be in the process of getting cleared for surgery but can't because they can't afford it. So that in itself a blessing. Try to stay positive and begin developing the mindset that you will need to have to be successful with the band, it will take a great deal of patience to see the specific results you're after even when that anticipated day comes and you are banded. Stay realistic about this whole experience- pre & post banding, so that you won't find yourself discouraged more often than not. Keep your hubby in the loop with how you feel so that he can be the support system that you need and be understanding during those times frustration gets the best of you. Before you know it you will be banded and well on your way! Stay motivated, inspired and excercise patience. Best of luck to you!

I couldn't have said it any better than this. Well said.

You guys are absolutely right! I just needed someone else to tell me to suck it up! (in not so many words!)

I am my worst critic, even though I try not to be, and of course my family would rather me be here than thinner, my initial reaction was just "great, what next!" but I will definitely take things one day at a time and know that each day I am a step closer to my "b-day" Thanks so much for the support!!

You guys are absolutely right! I just needed someone else to tell me to suck it up! (in not so many words!)

I am my worst critic, even though I try not to be, and of course my family would rather me be here than thinner, my initial reaction was just "great, what next!" but I will definitely take things one day at a time and know that each day I am a step closer to my "b-day" Thanks so much for the support!!

And you know what? Your B-day will get here faster than you could ever imagine. I had to jump through the insurance hoops and I thought it would never end, but I just knew I had to do it or I would kill myself w/ all of this extra weight. You''ll be so happy once it's all said and done. A few months is nothing compared to being happy and healthy for the rest of your life.

Good luck to you!!