I am sure some of you can relate to this:

I was talking to a friend today about being banded tomorrow (YEAH!) and how exciting it was. Her reply, "I know someone else who was banded and they gained all the weight back plus some. Good luck!"

GRRRRR!!! Talk about raining on my parade! Of course I didn't listen but still.....

Well of course they did!!! I bet every single one of us heard about Jane's cousin's uncle's sister who had the procedure done and gained it all back. I also heard how Susie was puking all the time.

What you WON'T hear is that Janes cousin's uncle's sister stopped getting her fill maintenance, stopped making good choices and stopped trying altogether. And that Susie never did stop eating too fast so she kept having stuck episodes making her upchuck it back on up all the time.

Good Luck! You will be fine! Don't listen to the negative nellies! They don't know what they're talking about!!!

Oh that makes me furious!!!! I'd like to slap this guy for you.......

i had a guy i knew from back in elem school tell me on facebook that i shouldnt do this i need to loose it on my own and it just takes dedication and i just need to get a trainer(he "knows and awesome one" ) dont take the easy way out. after 9 years of trying to loose weight and 285lbs at 5'5 i think its time to take alittle more of a drastic step... let me tell you the good part this gentleman is a body builder!! someone who it obviously comes easier to telling me i dont need surgery. i was super mad!!

dont let dumb people get in the way of your happiness and being healthy!

pamR: as long as your mom is there and happy to help you then thats all that matters! im sure if you asked your husband he would help you but like you said he has work, its not like your going into open heart surgery.

good luck to all of you and stay positive

It amazes me the amount of people I have came across that do not agrree with the lap-band..My favorite is "you're taking the easy way out" ... but 9 times out of ten..those are the people who have never had an issue with thier weight! Best Wishes!

BRBM6 you need to drop that friend like a bad habit lol Just tell her look this is a very personal and important journey for me and if you can't support me in the manner that a good friend would I would appreciate it if we didn't see each other for awhile because right now I need people around me that have my best interest at heart and your comments are just not coming across like you're one of them. You may not realize it but you're words are not the kindest things you COULD be saying to me right now. I hope your surgery day was a huge success and much greatness is headed your way. Enjoy the journey.

It amazes me the amount of people I have came across that do not agrree with the lap-band..My favorite is "you're taking the easy way out" ... but 9 times out of ten..those are the people who have never had an issue with thier weight! Best Wishes!

oh ya!! i def agree!! they are the type that can shove anything down their throat and not gain an oz, as for me i smell it and i add 5lbs to my climbing scale!! like i said earlier post loosing weight is not easy in any way

Well of course they did!!! I bet every single one of us heard about Jane's cousin's uncle's sister who had the procedure done and gained it all back. I also heard how Susie was puking all the time.

What you WON'T hear is that Janes cousin's uncle's sister stopped getting her fill maintenance, stopped making good choices and stopped trying altogether. And that Susie never did stop eating too fast so she kept having stuck episodes making her upchuck it back on up all the time.

Good Luck! You will be fine! Don't listen to the negative nellies! They don't know what they're talking about!!!

if that wasnt the truth i dont know what is!!!! they made it not work for them!!!!

My boss said today "omg really? well um....listen to everything they tell you ok...EVERYTHING" like really? no S**T OMG i was pissed! My other boss said "I've heard bad things but none the less GOOD LUCK I support you" and he hugged me, it made me feel awesome

I am so glad that this thread exists.

I have always been someone who has strived very hard to be healthy, and I was truly embarrassed at first when a lap band was suggested to me. I had been living with the myth that it was okay to be fat, and that even though I was fat, I was still healthy, it was a myth and a lie that weight affected health, and that it was better for me to be an empowered fat person than someone trying to lose weight. Well... I'm so glad that I finally started thinking for myself. No, I'm not as healthy as I could be. Granted, I'm healthier than a lot of other people who weigh as much as I do, and I am fairly active; but not like I could be. I can be so much healthier and fitter, and I can do so many more things if I lose weight. And it does affect my blood pressure, my blood sugar, and my reproductive health. It's true.

When I made the decision to work towards getting the surgery, my partner was discussing it with a supposedly good friend who immediately went on a huge diatribe about how I had a "Barbie Fantasy" and I shouldn't give in to what the male dominated society wanted me to look like. She told me I was making a horrible decision.

And then there are those who say it's a cop-out, and the easy way out, etc etc etc.

The truth is, that deep down we KNOW what our bodies need. I know that my body needs to be lighter so that I can do the things I love. It has NOTHING to do with how I look, or any Barbie fantasy or anything like that.

There will always be nay-sayers, whatever we do; whether it's because of jealousy, ignorance, or fear, or for whatever reason. Just do what you feel in your heart, mind and soul is right for you. That's what I'm doing!

I have to pat everyone on the back who has been comfortable with sharing their decision for surgery openly; only one person outside of my immediate family knows about mine and her dad had it done so it was no big deal to her. I know a LOT of judgemental people (had one "friend" who told me if I really wanted to lose weight I should get off my butt and join a Biggest Loser program or something; she had no clue I was thinking about the band and probably never will) and have no desire to share my decision with them. I haven't lost a lot yet but am proud to say I'm 40lbs lighter than I was this time last year and that's due to hard work, not some "easy way out". We still have to work our butts off even WITH the band, and for people to suggest otherwise infuriates me. Sure, sometimes I ask myself why I went this route when I see shows like 'Heavy' where people lose a bunch of weight without surgery, but you know what? I know me and I know I made the best decision for myself. At the end of the day we have to live for ourselves and do what is best for us.

:DOn December 21st of 2010, my Grandmother passed away, 2 days before my 30th birthday. She was 85, so she was no spring chicken, but I cant help but feel like she didnt have to die. She had struggled with weight her entire life. She would be a size 0, then a size 24, then a size 2, then a size 20 again. She did all of the fad diets back when they were new, like the Atkins, and she took dozens of diet pills, but the weight always came back. In her later years she started having joint problems. First the shoulders, then the knees, then finally the hips, having them all replaced. Because at this time she had been in pain for a while, she had become very sedentary, and lost almost all of her muscle mass, so the hip joints never really took, because there was nothing for them to "hold on to" So she sat in her wheel chair and got bigger, and bigger and bigger. For the last FIFTEEN years she had been completly wheelchair bound. In spite of all this, it didnt slow her down. She had a wheel chair accessable van, so she was pretty self sufficient. She grocery shopped on her own, and still volunteered at her church. (It was an electric wheel chair, because her shoulders were artifical too, and coulnt support the range of motion for a manual wheel chair). For about the last two years, she kept getting chronic bladder infections. Thats what happens when you are sedentary, and obese, your bladder stops emptying all of the way, and the little urine that stays, gradually gets infected. Not only is it miserable to have an infection, but after a while they started to affect her mind. Thats how we knew when she was getting sick, because most of the time she was so lucic and accurate, but when the infections would start, she would stop eating, and start to tell stories of how she had had a good conversation with a dead relative. Finally, last October, I stopped by her house and found her sitting in her closet talking to no one, so we took her to the ER and she was admitted (again) for a bad bladder infection. When it came time to discharge her from the hospital, they sent her to a rehab to get her strength back, so she could go back home, and it was there that she contracted pheumonia, and 3 weeks after that, she died. Because she was so sedentary, her lungs were weak, and they couldnt fight it. When we decided to turn the Oxygen off, she lived for another 12 hours, because her heart was so strong, it just wouldnt give up.

So, lesson learned.........I dont give a flying rats happy furry ass what other people think about my choice to have this surgery. I need the help. I know I do. I have similar desires like everyone else ( I want to be a sexy goddess for the husband who is the love of my life) and I want to set a good example for my children. But most of all, I dont want to die like that. I dont want to be the strong woman who raises a great family, only to have the end game be that I have to have my diapers changed because I cant care for myself, or that to go to eat, I have to be lifted by a crane, because im so big that even the big men in the complex cant help lift me. I REFUSE to be that person.

Next week I go to get banded! HOORAY!! I havent shouted out to the world that I am having surgery, but not because I dont want to hear the nay sayers, but because this is a personal journey for me. I understand my reasons more than anyone else in the world possibly could, and to the super skinny girl who thinks this is the easy choice, or to the body builder who thinks im lazy, I feel sorry for their closed mindedness. Thinking that what is right for you is right for everyone is a disease, thats what is wrong with the world today.

Wow! That was a HUGE rant! Thanks for letting me let it go! You guys rock!

I've heard that more with by-pass than the band. I know what you are saying, these negative, mean spirited people who don't really want you to succeed...But we do! We want you healthy and beautiful and full of energy. The band is a tool. Take full advantage of it and glow in your success!! You may find that you have to let some people go out of your life if they don't want you to succeed. Up front, they will say they are happy for you, but inside they are jealous. It is ok if people are envious, but you should not have a friend that is jealous of you. Surround yourself with positive people that truly care for you. You've got us here!!!

Yep! She said it just like that. Oh well! Some people are never happy! I am just happy to be starting my new life....27 lbs. down and about a hundred more to go! Yipee! For once in my life I feel I can do it!

Fear of the unknown is what can sometimes drive people to say stupid things, I have to believe that otherwise it would just be stupidity that drives them and I would like to try and think a little better of the people out there lol.

You all will be fine, just remember why your doing this and on't second guess yourselves. We have tried it all and sometimes it's just out of our hands.

PamR You need to remember this is a tool that we will use to help us on this journey, will we sometimes fall yes will we pick ourselves up and try again yes its called being human. Remember there are all kinds of victory's and if you find you slip a little remember every day is a new day to start again. If she is doing all of these mean things to you then hold your head high and smile cause you will know your a better person than that, and she will not suceed in her long term weight journey. A good friend always tells me "God doesn't like ugly".

Good Luck to everyone

Hugs

TT

Hey, I gotta bust up this party and say you're not allowed to use the word TOOL! LOL -- Anything but tool, anything! :blink: