annybear

March 2005 I found myself at 400 pounds, Married, Unhappy and 27 years young! I couldn't use a ''normal'' size public restroom. I couldn't tie my own shoes. I couldn't keep up with my 10 year old Son who was and always will be the light of my life. My best friend decided she was tired of being overweight. I didn't put much thought into dieting with her at the time because I was tired and lazy and didn't want to put forth the effort it would take. A few months later I went clothes shopping with her. She and I shared a dressing room to try on new clothes (oh how I hated clothes shopping at 400 pounds). I could see the difference in her...visually see it as she was putting on smaller clothes...the first thought that ran through my head was ''Oh HELL no I'm not going to be the ''FAT'' friend!'' And that was the start of a unhealthy journey....(not my first one by any means I've yo-yoed for years) I joined the gym with her, which was good. I started out slow in water aerobics as my body was not ready for the shock and impact of actual physical exercise. I have a bad back, bad joints, ankle surgery four times on the same ankle, chronic headaches, and more in my medical history along with sleep apnea of course. I had ever excuse in the book not to exercise...but I forced myself to squeeze my body into that black rubber like bathing suit that made me look like shamoo on vacation and went to water aerobics. We also focused on walking and counting calories. Never went to a doctor for advise... did allot of online research about it of course. As I lost the weight and the exercising got easier I stopped with the water aerobics and moved up to the elliptical and treadmill. Before I knew it I was walking 4+ miles a day and eating less than 800 calories a day and fitting very very nicely into a size 12 jean at 197 pounds! It took me 14 months. I was making myself sick and had gone from one eating disorder to another...without even knowing it! I had cut out so much fat from my diet that I ended up giving myself gallstones the size of ping pong balls. I turned Jaundice and got really sick. Ended up with emergency surgery in November of 2007. December 24th 2007 - I divorced my 2nd Husband, Jan 4th 2008 - I moved what little I had to Western New York, December 19th 2009 - My Mother died alone without anyone in WA State, May 30th 2009 - I married a wonderful man who loves me even though I've gone from 197 to 330lbs, August 2009 - My 14 year old Son decides he is home sick and moves Back to WA State with my Grandmother, his Great Grandmother, February 10th 2010 - I visit my Bariatric Weight Loss Doctor weighing in at 369 pounds, April 2010 - I reach the 18 pound requirement set by my doctor to move forward, May 10th 2010 - Insurance Approved Surgery after 1st request, June 11th 2010 - Upper GI for prep for Surgery, and June 28th 2010 - I am due to have my Lap Band Surgery!!These are the events that have lead me to where I am now. Of course the only thing that has lead me to being back at 369 pounds is my hand to mouth ''disease''. Letting every little bump in the road give me another reason to put off what I know I must do. I've put most of my ''bumps'' behind me.  I am looking forward to moving ahead and not looking back... Writing this has actually made me realize that more than I knew. I know that this is NOT a ''quick fix'' and I am aware that I must work hard every day to reach my goals...I hope to find the friends and new ''family'' here to help me along the way as we all share in the common goal to be happy, healthy, positive people!