Meliwriter

Forgot to weigh in last week. I'm at 283 on the nose today. That is two lbs down but over two weeks so still a little slower than I would like! But a loss is a loss. I will take it.

Thank you so much for being brave enough to share your journey! I'm glad to see the surgery went well and you are on your way to recovery. Best of luck and please do continue to share your updates on the board. I've had a lot of trouble with my band and my original surgeon wanted me to convert to the bypass but my insurance wouldn't cover it and my new doctor believes I can be successful with the band and has made some adjustments. It is still a very slow, learning process but I'm trying to be patient. It makes me happy to hear you are having some success again!

So I've been reading a lot of posts and many people mentioned how helpful it has been to have a therapist to help them with the mental and emotional part of this journey. Ive had two rough years with the band and even though I have not given up and am still losing weight I think taking this next step and talking with someone about the other issues both food related and non food related I will be better prepared for success. My problem is that I do not know where to start. I want someone who deals w wls patients or food related issues or addictions. How did folks find a therapist? Am I being too picky about this? I did not like the person my original surgeon recommended for pre surgery evaluation. I have no idea to start so I have been putting it off for a while.

I've been reading a lot of he posts on the boards and many folks have mentioned that they regularly see a therapist to help them with the mental challenges that come along with the surgery and weightloss. Anyone in the columbus area have recommendations? I was not comfy with the therapist my surgeon used for preop and really want someone who rgularly deals with wls patients or folks with food related issues. Thoughts? Am I being too picky?

I've been nervous about getting rid of clothes and because I'm a slow loser it has made me even more cautious. But I just went through some winter clothes this weekend and pulled out clothes that I was hanging on to. There is something mentally rewarding about letting go. It will reaffirm your commitment to this journey!

First I want to say thanks for sharing your stories!!! I know it can be hard to say, "Hey, I'm a slow loser!" when everyone else is saying "Look at me I lost 50lbs in my first two months!" It is so important for others to know that we are not alone in this journey, that for some of us it is a lot harder than others and it does not mean that you are a failure. The biggest lesson I have learned thus far is that no ones journey is exactly the same, and that is because our bodies are not the same. In life two people weighting the exact same amount, process food differently. So why is it that when we think about the Band, we compare ourselves to people who had surgery the same date or who had a starting weight the same as ours? I've been at this since Jan 2010. I switched doctors this year and was told my band was too tight. I was also given very different nutrition guidelines and general instructions on how to function with my band than I was with my first doctor. I too learned I was avoiding good foods because they got stuck and relying on bad ones to fill me up. Those foods are higher calorie and less filling than the Protein and veggies I was avoiding. I've learned a lot more about what hunger feels like, how to determine when I need a fill, etc. Ex. I time myself when I eat. If I eat in less than 20 minutes I ate too fast and there is a good chance I ate the wrong things! ex, I can't eat chicken that fast, it will get stuck! but I can eat yogurt, pudding or ice cream that fast. I love Cereal, I used to eat that, and not only can I eat a lot of it very quickly but it is one of those slider foods that go right through me and I'm hungry in an hour. I eat ever 3 hrs like clockwork. Some people say they aren't hungry for 4-5 hours and I am and I've learned for me that is normal. Its okay! If I am super busy (i.e. out of town for work or a conference or vacation) I may be able to go for longer amounts but what usually happens is that if I go for 4-5 hrs I am so hungry by the time that I realize I haven't ate that I make very bad decisions, my mind is telling me I want anything and i don't always have the willpower to say no. knowing this I don't put myself in that situation. Don't set yourself up for failure! I know this is a hard, long, journey and I know I sometimes question if it is really worth it. Should I keep going or just give up, but I know how important it is for me to be healthy. If this is the most important thing for me, how can I just give up on myself? I am worth being happy and healthy. The thing I hate more than anything is not having the freedom, the choice to do whatever I want with my body. I don't do things because I am over or close to being over the weight limit and I don't like the idea of my weight restricting my life. That will be my biggest victory in this journey and I don't need to be 130lbs to do that! Set your own goals for success, big and small and Celebrate everything! Celebrate eating a piece of chicken or steak and taking the small bites and not getting stuck! Celebrate hitting your daily calorie or protein goal. Celebrate taking a walk, stepping inside the gym, parking at the back of the lot, walking the stairs, saying no to ice cream! Celebrate it all! I'll gladly celebrate with you. If either of you need some cheering I always read the posts for these boards and you can also friend me or send private messages! They call it a support group for a reason and not feeling so alone has helped me stay focused on the bigger picture.

I switched doctors! For very different reasons, but it was the best thing I ever did! I originally had two doctors that I was debating between pre surgery and though I liked one better went with the other one out of convenience. It was closer, (by more than 2 hrs) and my cousin was a nurse in the surgical recovery there and had high praise for them. My mother and grandmother were also considering surgery at the same hospital so it seemed to make sense. I completely regret that decision. The surgeon was nice. He did a great job with the surgery as far as I can tell. It was the staff/facility that I had a problem with. The aftercare was horrendous. I had little support, it was a pain in the butt getting appointments and then when I would show up they would be significantly late. They would blow off any questions or concerns I had. I would request for a flouroscopy or to see the surgeon and then when I showed up they would not know anything about it and I would have made a wasted trip. I was a slow loser and quickly plateaud and they blamed me, saying I wasn't following rules and just kept giving me fills. Finally they told me the band wasn't for me and that I should get it removed and try gastric bypass. I woke up and realized the problem wasn't with me it was with them. I went back to my other choice who had since opened up a satellite office in my city (given so many patients were traveling the long distance to be treated by him) and have seen significant changes. He did not believe I was a failure or the band wouldn't work for me. He actually thought I might have an overfill and recommended removing some Fluid. He and his staff have had the surgery and been successful and the rules and guidance they provided has helped me be successful. I did have to pay about $600 for a consult, which the insurance did not cover but in my opinion it was well worth it! I wish I hadn't wasted my time ( more than 2 years!) fooling around with the other doctor and beating myself up for things that weren't in my control. I know your situation is different but I say trust your gut. You do not need to be chained down to a doctor, but good ones can be hard to find. Get recommendations, meet with the new doc and make sure you know what you're getting into. Sometimes even the good doctors run late! Probably because we all want to see them! Good luck!

I made it back to my favorite Zumba class for the first time since November when I injured my leg! I've been working up to this day for a while as my pt did not want me doing any high impact activities. I finally got the go ahead and told myself I would only do 30 min but once I got in there I was having so much fun I didn't want to stop! I am so excited I just had to share. It's perfect timing because I just changed up my diet and exercise routine this week and I'm already seeing the difference.

Thanks for the amazing post and congratulations on your success! I had my surgery in 2009 and have had a very long weight loss journey thus far. One of the most important things that I have learned is that this journey is different for everyone. I love your point about not comparing yourself to other bandsters! So much of this journey is a mental journey and I really struggled with that my first year and became a bit depressed about my lack of progress compared to other individuals who had surgery at the same time. For a while I stopped getting fills and just sort of gave up until I remembered why this surgery was so important to me. I came back at it with more passion and determination than ever. I changed doctors, (because that was also a big issue that was holding me back) and I've lost all of the weight I gained and another 8 lbs thus far since. I have a long way to go and know it is going to continue to be slow for me, but being a part of this online community and learning from and sharing with my fellow bandsters helps to keep me accountable and focused on what I have to do each and every day to keep moving forward. This is my new life and I have embraced it! Your post is great for newbies but also a nice reminder for those of us still pushing towards our goal. Your reflections are really spot on!

Name, real or screen~ Meliwriter Age~30 Weight on June1st~ 285 Goal Weight for June 29th~275 Exercise Goal for June~ Adding 3 days of weight training to workout routine Dietary Goal for June~ Embracing non-starchy veggies in diet! Personal Goal for June~ back to serious journaling my food intake. Date Banded~1/20/2009 Total Weight Loss Since Banding~ 50 lbs

I have a 10cc band and was at 8cc before i had any restriction at all. I was really worried about it and kept thinking something must be wrong because so many other people I talked with had restriction with much smaller amounts in their fluid. I've had two different doctors and both told me that for some people it just works that way, everyone is different and you can actually fill the band slightly beyond the size. However like most people I did get to a point where any fills now are minimal and still making a huge difference in what I can eat. My current doctor actually talked about possibly doing an unfill because I was having trouble tolerating certain foods, but honestly I think I might have been eating too fast in those cases! Unfills sound scary to me.

The band works by restricting your caloric intake and hopefully makes you feel full or satisfied with relatively little food. My success has been much longer and much slower than most because my metabolism was very slow to start with and I was already fully functioning (without weight loss) on a low calorie intake. The biggest surprise for me was that I went into this thinking I would lose weight just eating a healthy balanced diet but I actually still have to pay very strict attention to what I eat in order to lose weight. The difference between the lap band and other diets is primarily because of the restriction. You physically can't eat certain foods without getting sick. Everyone is different with what they can tolerate, though, some folks can't eat bread, I can. I can't eat chicken AT ALL. And getting food stuck is one of the most painful experiences ever so you don't want to repeat whatever triggered it! Hope that helps. It's not picture perfect and everyone is a little different but I wish you much success! Congrats on making your decision to get healthy and take the next step.

Fills are key!! You must get fills, and for some people (like me) your band may be completely full or close to it before you even get decent restriction. Everyone is different, no one seems to know exactly why but it is completely normal to not have restriction right after surgery or even before your first two or three fills (or more). I was a year in before I ever had any food stuck because of a fill, boy was that a shock! You'll also find on the boards that for some people the weight comes right off and for others it is a constant struggle of monitoring diet and exercise. Some people are really sensitive to carbs even with the band and the limited intake. My dr is very strict on a lower carb diet, and though I don't always like it, the weight didn't come off until I embraced it. Good luck!

I was very selective about who I told because I didn't want all the assumptions and questions that went with sharing my decision to have weight loss surgery. My family knew and said that they would be supportive but I quickly learned that there are two different types of support and the one I needed most my family struggled to provide. To clarify, my mother and grandmother both wanted the surgery as well. We went in together, and for various reasons they were not able to have the surgery. While they said they were happy for me and were there every step of the way during the surgery and recovery, my first year was really hard because they were not willing to acknowledge the mental journey and complete lifestyle change that I needed to make. I'm not sure if it was jealousy, resentment, or their own disappointment in the system but from the start they questioned everything I did, everything the doctor said. Every time I turned down a piece of food from my mother it was like I was slapping her in the face. She felt like I was rejecting her. To be honest I was probably a huge reminder that what she was eating wasn't healthy and she didn't want to acknowledge that. Example: less than 10 days post surgery my mother demanded that I go to a birthday dinner for my sister, even though I couldn't eat at that point and when I tried to refuse she called me selfish and spoiled. I eventually gave in and went and then she demanded I order something from the menu so that it wasn't awkward for the others around me. So I sat with a bowl of cold chili in front of me for an hour so that everyone else could feel comfortable and pig out while I was absolutely miserable. And don't think I didn't want to eat everything that they were eating!! It was horrible. It took me two years to hit my 50 lb milestone and when I did, even knowing how hard I had to work to get there my sister got angry when I shared the news, told me I was just rubbing it in her face and left me in tears on the phone. She did realize what she did and apologized but I realized my biggest obstacle was learning that I am strong enough to do this on my own and having the courage to do what I know is right for me and my health even if it makes some other people uncomfortable. Living to please other people and trying to be perfect is what got me into this mess. I don't blame my family, they have their own struggles to deal with, but I did have a breakthrough when I realized that I could stand up to them and defend my right to be happy and healthy. I thought I could inspire them to change, that they could take this journey with me, but now I realize they have to make that choice for themselves just like I did. I've definitely had some issues with my friends. Our lives were about going out and eating and drinking and I couldn't do either. I found I had to tell them about the surgery so that they didn't think I was odd if I only ordered a side for a meal or picked at my food. I found if you don't tell them they make assumptions about you that are usually a lot worse than the reality! My friends have actually been more supportive than my family. They are accommodating and don't feel threatened if I'm not binging on fast food or demand to bring my own food to a bbq. They help me Celebrate my successes and remind me to stay focused on the big picture. And being more open and honest has even brought my sister around and she's actually starting to support me in her own way. So yes, my journey has been tough, and very very slow, but well worth it.

Are you keeping track of the types of food you are eating? Meeting your Protein goals as well as your calorie intake? My previous doctor worked off of the MO that if you just ate less you would lose weight. My new doctor (who also has a band) doesn't believe that is true, that for some patients you do need to follow stict guidelines on what types of things you are eating. Your body is smart and it adapts quickly. if you aren't getting the right mix of nutrients or breakdown of protein, carbs, fat and Fiber, your body can go wonky on you and refuse to lose weight. It's basically operating in starvation mode. Of course if I knew the secret to jumping out of that plateau I would be rich! You've only had three fills! It took a lot longer for me to even get real restriction. I was a year in before it happened. At least you know you aren't alone and this isn't completely unheard of!