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BethFromVA

Pre Op
  • Joined

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Everything posted by BethFromVA

  1. Only if they looked like young, nubile, prepubescent boys. Again, if they make you gag, don't swallow when they... you know.
  2. Well, that's very true. I mean the added gas could cause quite the explosion.
  3. It's either also known as the G-spot OR it's that spot you hit when you are gonna ralph if you eat one more sweet.
  4. Apparently you are. Though don't think of it as bad. It makes ME feel superior, so there is a silver lining.
  5. WAIT, I remember now!!!! YOU were the fireman he was messin' with, before you got the Jerry Springer sex change!! YOU BASTAR-- er, SLUT!
  6. Just watch your fingers. Though... well, let's be honest, extra protein.
  7. Not if you think he'll say no.
  8. Well the thought was that once Obama took over, we wouldn't have to pay our mortgages or for gas. I'm still waiting for that to happen. >sigh< Yeah, I hear you're quite the attraction. Have a wick coming out of your head and everything.
  9. Holy cow, was her name Patty? Patty GREEN??
  10. VEGAN?? Like total no-eggs-or-cheese type? Shit, girl, that's gonna be a tofu cake.
  11. If you blend 'em just right and can suck 'em through a straw, I'm sure you'll be fine.
  12. Don't swaller. :confused:
  13. Send him packing. He's probably doing the mailman anyway.
  14. Did you forget Bruce left me for that fireman?
  15. So... did YOU run your surgeon out of town?
  16. Hey, be-otch, I don't live in a trailer like lucky you, I live in a box on Main and 14th. So therefore I only eat at Jack-In-The-Box (get it? We gotsta stick together). As for the circus, they said I wasn't hairy enough for their bearded lady opening, so I'm a bit bummed. Way to kick me when I'm down.
  17. Okay, if cereal gets soggy, eat it standing on your head. Don't ask how this works cuz I have no freakin' idea. Maybe your boyfriend is "tiny." Tell him I said so. Give him my number if he wants a piece of me. As for the whens and hows of eating cereal, so long as you start immediately after surger and don't go over a box a day, you should be fine. But see the above about it being soggy.
  18. Hey, bubbles tickle. And the nice thing is, if it's filled with fart gas, you can send it over to somebody as a "present."
  19. Don't check with your surgeons. Not only do they not know anything, but they'll say not to do it. Only because they're greedy bastards.
  20. Sorry, you're f*cked. Thinner, yes, but you look like a melted candle, right? That's what you get for eating too many Big Macs in the first place. Deal. Maybe join the circus as the amazing melting woman.
  21. LIAR!!! What do YOU know, you unbanded freak?? Sheesh, get your effin' facts straight! You could do somebody some real damage, you fruit loop!
  22. Pickle juice MIGHT erode the band from the inside (note, drinking it is fine). However, I have noticed that liquid detergent works really well.
  23. Crap, looks like I got mine in time! I don't have a boyfriend named Willie.
  24. You mean my already three-inch vulva will SAG? So I'll have to start rolling them up like my titties? Gawd, I hate my band.
  25. I dunno, does he f*ck or pay attention to you now? Doubt it.

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