BarbieVSG14

I also believe that if you have a crappy relationship pre op, you'll have a crappier relationship post op as the bariatric patient becomes happier and more secure with themselves, hence the divorce rate post op. Stronger relationships are able to adapt and work though the inevitable changes.

LOL I'm with you on the Trump thing! Respectfully, I don't believe the partner has to be in the same place mentally as the person having the surgery does as far as diet and exercise. Like I said, it's OUR journey, not theirs. I don't expect the entire world to change for me just because I've chosen to change my lifestyle. Lord knows we aren't living in a very bariatric friendly world, that's for sure! He doesn't formally exercise, I do, and have continually for almost 4 years. It hasn't hindered me in the least. He still eats his processed crap, I make up for that by cooking healthy meals minus the starch with just protein and veggies ;). I understand that having someone doing it along with us is ideal in a perfect world, but let's be real. The world isn't perfect and the only thing we CAN control is us. This can be completely doable without your partner doing it along with you. I and many others are living proof of that. It's all about how bad we really want it.

It's easy to get upset at the offending partner when they make comments like that, but honestly take it from someone who's been married for 30 years, it all comes from a place of insecurity and fear of the unknown....for both of you. You need to help her understand that your journey to a healthier you is only going to make you a happier, more fulfilled person, which in turn should make her happy, too. Try to reassure her how important her love and support will mean to you as embark on this new chapter of your lives. After all, change is a normal, contstant part of life, and the strongest relationships can adapt. As far as her not being willing to change her lifestyle, you can't control what she does, only how you react to it. YOU are choosing to do this, not her. Find another support system if need be. As long as she can at least emotionally support you, there's no need for her to change her activity and eating habits if she doesn't want to. My husband didn't, and I did just fine. You will too if you REALLY want to. She may also surprise you and come around.

I'm almost 4 years post op, and haven't vomited once! Had some nausea quite a few times, but no actual vomiting. I have also never had a bad experience with any foods, either. My sleeve can handle anything. Double edged sword, I suppose

Hi sweetie, If you absolutely feel it's the right thing to do for you, yiu should feel no hard regret. I had an abortion almost 25 years ago. Married, 2 toddlers. I felt is wasn't fair to the two we already had and were barely affording. Still married to the same man, and those two toddlers are amazing, successful, kind and responsible adults. No regrets. We did what we thought was right for our situation. That being that would have been really knows no different, as opposed to the living, breathing wonderful humans I raised. Hugs to you.