MimiBMe

Be honest: How does your extra skin make you feel?
I was watching the new show "Skin Tight" on TLC with the young lady who's name is Lauana, mentioning her excess skin and how it REALLY made her feel. I personally have always had the knack of pushing my feelings aside and just being happy with 'Good Enough'... but then she spoke.


Be honest: How does your extra skin make you feel?
I was watching the new show "Skin Tight" on TLC with the young lady who's name is Lauana, mentioning her excess skin and how it REALLY made her feel. I personally have always had the knack of pushing my feelings aside and just being happy with 'Good Enough'... but then she spoke.
I have always wanted to eventually get my skin removed, someday. I've been at or near goal for about 4 years now, or something like that. I've never really counted. But I also never acknowledged the fact that I may be more fit, healthier, smaller.. whatever, but I am not a finished product. I still have one more step to go and with watching that Television program I was slapped in the face with it. I need to have my excess skin removed.
To this day I've never ever shared photos of my excess skin, and I probably won't until it's gone. Kind of the Before and After effect. I can't stand it. The gal who was on there, we look exactly alike naked. And when she said, "Sometimes I wonder if it's just better to be fat and filled out rather than be left with this saggy skin..." I felt that a little too much! I almost cried. Honesty came to the forefront and it made me realize that until I get it through my thick skin... (pun intended?) that I will never feel complete. Later during her consultation, the surgeon pulled her excess arm skin to the back, revealing a slender beautifully fit arm. I couldn't stop the tears from flowing at that point. All I could do was reach next to my bed and grab a tissue and wipe away the shame of what I had done to my body. I could see in my imagination the many times I'd done that in front of my mirror when I'm all alone in the room. Wondering what it must be like.. going out in public without worry someone is looking at my saggy arms, or what they must be thinking. I want to feel that general confidence that come with that.
I have always said that yes, I wanted to have my excess skin removed, but not with as much certainty as I was at that moment.
So why am I sharing this here? Why am I not sharing this in the skin removal category? Because, this is something that majority and I mean 90ish percent of us will think about at some point. With WLS comes a lot of fat loss, and with a lot of fat loss comes a lot of extra skin. Of course there will be some lucky people out there without the extra skin, and God Blessed them. But me? No, I have it. I hate it. I want it gone. I also hope that through this channel of communication I can bring others some comfort. That you are not alone, you are not crying alone. You are not wishing and hating your skin alone.
I have gone through more than my share of surgeries since my Lap Band in 2008, so the thought of more surgeries has me turned off. That said, when I see my friends who have had the skin removed... my heart aches for that feeling that I know nothing about. What it must be like to look tight, and finally feel like a normal person (whatever that means!). I want to say however that I wouldn't change a thing about my journey. I am glad that I made the choice to have Weight Loss Surgery. I am glad that I kept fighting when things didn't seem to go my way. I am glad that I stayed positive and kept moving forward when it felt like I wasn't losing. I am glad I stayed strong mentally and kept working toward a new day.
I am mostly thankful to myself that I kept that part of me in the background when I really needed to focus on other health issues I was having. I most likely would have gone crazy otherwise... but I've gotten all of the other health issues resolved. So now, this issue is ready for me to fix.
I am now in that fork in the road of, do I just take one course and keep the skin? Or do I take the other road and help myself achieve what I always imagined in my head I could be?
Thanks to the new TLC show, I have finally made my choice.
Loving myself doesn't have to be accepting myself the way I am. It can also mean loving myself enough to be everything I imagine in my head. There can always be room for improvement.

This is great reminder Alex, thank you!
I have also been practicing one more. While holiday shopping for your family and friends. Buy something nice for yourself! Show off that new body, there is nothing better than feeling confident and looking fantastic!
Shhhhh.....I did this a lot over the last couple weeks. I was tired of wearing clothes that are too big for me. There will be a few gifts under the tree with my name on it from Santa!

Here’s why putting yourself first can make everyone else happier, and how you can put yourself first this holiday season.
The holidays are about being a good person, right? You’re supposed to be thankful for what you have. You’re supposed to give to others, and put others’ needs first.
I agree completely, but you can do more for others when you’re at your best. You’ll be at your best when you take care of yourself, so here are some ideas for keeping yourself in your best physical, mental, and emotional shape…so you have more to give others.
So here are some ways to put yourself first this holiday season. They’ll help you eat a little healthier, stay a little fitter, and be a little more in control than if you neglect your own needs. And they’ll help you be able to do more for others.


Eat Right
Can’t get away from this one, can you? You know when you eat well, you have more energy, feel more confident, and are happier. That’s a recipe for being able to do some quality gift shopping or even volunteer work.
You know what “eating right” means. Base your meals around lean protein like non-fat cottage cheese, tuna, beans, egg whites, or chicken breast, for example. Add a bunch of vegetables, and enjoy some fruit or healthy starches at most meals. Pretty simple, and so effective! Oh, and if you do indulge? Keep it to a small and delicious bite to savor.
Use the Trash Can, Don’t Be One
If you’ve ever eaten something just because it’s there, you’ve used your body as a trash can. That’s because you ate something you didn’t need instead of simply leaving it or throwing it out. This happens a lot around the holidays, when you might eat the leftovers or a plate of Christmas cookies because you feel guilty throwing them out.
Guess what. When you throw trash into your body instead of a can, you’re not helping starving children in Africa. If you really want to help them, why not make a donation? Donate, say, a penny for every calorie you dump, or a quarter for every cookie you toss. Now that’s how putting yourself first can help out others in need!
Exercise
When you exercise, you’re happier, more energetic, and more focused. Sound selfish? Not really. You can be more productive at work, better able to entertain your friends and family, and readier to whip up that next batch of cookies when your children have a last-minute request for a contribution to a classroom holiday party.
It can be tough to stick to your regular exercise schedule during the holidays. You can save time by getting your gear ready the night before and by planning your workout ahead of time so you make use of every moment.
Since it can be tempting to sleep in instead of a morning workout or just hang out at home in the evening, make use of other people to stay accountable. Make plans to meet an exercise buddy, or commit to group fitness classes. And, if you’re feeling too stressed or tired to do a hard workout, try going to the gym for some easy stretching. You’ll still get the mental benefits and stay in the healthy habit of being a gym rat.
De-Stress
Have you ever wanted to tell someone to just “chill!” because they’re making you nervous? Don’t be that person! Keep yourself cool and collected so everyone wants to be around you and not avoid you.
De-stress in whatever way works for you. You can go for a walk, get a massage or manicure, take a drive, or go shopping. It doesn’t matter…as long as you do it and it works. If it involves someone else, you’re doing double duty and helping someone else out as well!
Have Fun
Amidst all the hustle and bustle of taking care of yourself and others, don’t forget to have fun. Do whatever you want, whether it’s meeting a friend for (healthy) lunch, watching a full season of a TV show in a few days, or doing all the aisles at Walmart at 1:00 a.m. Whatever you’ve been dying to do all year, do it now. When you keep yourself happy, you’re better able to appreciate what other people need or want to be happy.
Forgive Yourself
Yes, things will go wrong. You’ll eat too much, or go a little overboard on the alcohol at a holiday party, or sleep in instead of working out. Or you’ll forget to pick up a gift for someone, or burn the cake you’re baking. It’s okay, and you’re best off if you can laugh it off and move on. Fret about it, and you’ll just be hurting other people who would rather see you happy than upset.
The holiday season is supposed to be about giving, but that can drain you if you don’t take care of yourself. Just like you do during the rest of your weight loss surgery journey, you need to put yourself first during the holidays. That lets you give your best to everyone else, too.

What are you thankful for this year?
Your home? Your job? Your family?
What are the other people in your life thankful for? What about your family? Your co-workers? Your friends? Do you ever wonder if any of them are thankful for YOU?
We often spend our lives working for others, doing things for others, helping others. Where’s the time for you? Taking care of ourselves and focusing on our own needs is usually WAY down on the list, if it’s on the list at all.
It feels selfish.


So, what if I told you it was actually self-LESS?
Yep, you read that right. Self-LESS.
Stop. Breathe. Read this very carefully:
If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.
Go back and read that again. And once more. Think about it:
What happens when you get sick? Or injured? Or have a nervous breakdown because you Just. Can’t. Even.
Again: If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of anyone else.
Are you hearing that? That’s not selfish, that’s self-LESS. If you don’t take time for YOU, you won’t be able to do anything for ANYONE ELSE. You will break, you will fall, you will crumble.
Give yourself a moment to let that sink in. While you are doing that, take a look at a few suggestions at how to make that happen:
Give yourself permission to say “no.”
Let’s go ahead and get the hard one out of the way first thing. You aren’t responsible for making sure that everyone gets everywhere or that they get everything they want. Granted, young children have more needs than adults, but I’m betting that if you sit back and think for a moment, there are times that if you said “no,” the individual would either: a) just do without it, or find some other way to make it happen. Often, you’re the “go to” person because people realize that you’ll say YES.
Set aside a specific time for your self care and treat it like an appointment you can’t miss.
You know that doctor’s appointment it took you 2 months to get? And how you made sure that nothing stood in the way of you getting to that appointment? Yeah, treat your self care time just as special. Program it in your phone. Write it on the calendar. Let your family know that you have an appointment that you can’t miss and that you won’t be available. You need this.
Expect others to push your boundaries.
Especially in the beginning. They won’t be used to you being so assertive, so the attempts to make you feel guilty for not dropping everything to attend to their needs may ramp up for awhile. It’s okay! Remember, this is expected. You’re preparing for it now, by reading this, so when it happens you will already know that it is temporary.
By sticking to your boundaries and not giving in, IT WILL GET BETTER. If you give in now, you have shown that if they push hard enough, they will eventually get there way. Don’t stop.
Remember: we cannot be good caregivers if we don’t practice self care.
It’s not selfish, its self-LESS.