DreamWeaver44

This site has been my refuge. Anytime I have a question, or a doubt, or feel discouraged... it helps! Tonight, (because it seems everyone keeps track by weeks) I looked at the calendar and realized I'm only 2 weeks out! Time seems to move very slowly, but it made me realize how impatient I've been; and that I need to slow down and appreciate how well I feel only 2 weeks post-op! I've been focusing on the things I've lost, the things I can't do... rather than on how great I feel already, just not consuming fast-food 24/7 I miss the temporary comfort it always provided, but I sure don't miss the sluggish, low blood-sugar haze I stayed in. I don't miss spending all the money it took to buy one more carb-loaded feast to get me through the next exhausted shift. (I work nights) I was killing myself, and I had stopped caring in many ways. Two weeks: and my incisions are healing nicely, I've lost 21 pounds total, and already I feel a difference in the way I'm able to get around. It was a struggle before just to manage personal hygiene and getting dressed. I was literally to the point that I would break a sweat getting dressed and just cry because I felt hopeless to improve things. Then surgery became a possibility, and gave me new hope. It has been a struggle to get the fluids and protein in, but I haven't been sick yet, only some mild indigestion. I think I balked at first; because I imagined surgery meant being able to not have to think about food so much. Let's be honest, I'm lazy. But it's a different kind of planning, and once I develop a routine I know it will get better. I have to watch myself with my negative-thinking-habits, but I'm excited about the future and to witness the journey of so many others as well. Ami