bellabloom

How on earth are you so close to goal at 4 months out??

If your getting full off so little after 1.5 years, how on earth are you getting enough calories??

I adore you! Your are so awesome. I love your outlook and I love that your brace and bold and whatever guy does win your love is one lucky man!! I didn't let that guys jerk comment bother me too long. I dropped him like a stone and he couldn't understand why!!! Please. I've told a lot of other dates and they all didn't care and wanted to take me out again. It really isn't that big of a deal.

I hear what you are saying. I'm not disregarding your suggestions. And it's true, when I make a concerted and constant effort to eat and that's my entire focus I can eat more. Obviously this isn't just a physical issue for me and I never claimed it was. It is mental. It's an absolute mental battle combined with physicality that makes it even more difficult. I'm not in a great spot with my eating habits and I'm not really sure what to do next. I'm definitely not bragging. I'm sick in the head! Seriously people. I'm struggling just like many others here, just differently. What's the difference between me being unable to put enough food in than someone who can't stop putting in too much? I've had a ton of private messages on here from readers who are struggling with the same issues as me. They aren't brave enough to post about but it's more common than everyone thinks. And it's not "I'm self indulgent and want people to feel sorry for me or pay attention to me" for being too skinny or being as skinny as I can be. It's not about approval and it's not shallow. That's like saying that people get fat because they are lazy and gluttons. And we all know it's much deeper than that. I appreciate everyone's concern and advice and I will continue to post on my journey because I know there are others struggling with my same issues. And if anyone wants to judge me that's fair. This a public forum after all. I'm not trying to scare anyone away from this surgery. I would do it over again in a second. I'm so glad I had this surgery because the alternative was way worse. It's going to take me a long time to get peace with food. If I ever do. At this point in just hoping for some sort of routine that keeps my weight within a safe range. All your suggestions are appreciated, any support I can get and they aren't dismissed. There just limits to what I can mentally handle. Food is a big problem for me! Just like it is, or at least was, for all of you. Hahhahaa I am just laughing about the section in the last post "making people suffer for something I could easily control". Man. That's just so... Sigh. If I could control my issues around food why did I get fat at all? Couldn't I just shut my mouth?? Me getting fat cost me my marriage and so much suffering, so much suffering!!! Why didn't I "control" myself then????? Please.

I hate it when people say "when you stop looking you'll find someone". Why do I have to prove that I can be alone to be worthy of someone? I'm not going to settle on the wrong person but I'm happy to go out and have fun with them for now! Life is too good to sit around watching Netflix. I am single but I'm enjoying dating. I was in a relationship for years and I missed being single! I want to enjoy it for the time that I am. I might complain a bit here and there but in the end I'm having fun even with the bad ones. Latingoddess I hear you and I'm happy for you!! But this Brazilian babe has too much fire under her butt to stay at home and wait. Hehehhee

I've got a doozy!! Oh man. Met this guy online. Really liked him. We went to the movies and had a great time. He keeps texting me about various health problems he has though... And I'm thinking... Weird? Anyway I mention I have trouble with digestion. He asks me for Details so I say something vague. He then goes- "so what your saying is you were a fatty and had your stomach stapled?" I freeze. I'm thinking, omg how does he know! So I reply that yes, that's pretty much it. And he's in shock. I guess he was kidding! Haha right? So I explain most people are very shocked when I tell them because I'm so little now. They can't picture me overweight. He replies "are they shocked by how small you are or by the inevitable revealing of your skin folds?" I cried for 20 minutes and blocked his phone number.

It's incredible what a salty diet and high sugar diet does to your body. If I eat junk food one day my rings doesn't fit and a gain 3 pounds in water weight. Imagine eating that way every day!! Now I understand why I was so bloated and puffy before.

Oh man. Met this guy online. Really liked him. He keeps texting me about various health problems he has though... And I'm thinking... Weird? Anyway I mention I have trouble with digestion. He asks me for Details so I say something vague. He then goes- "so what your saying is you were a fatty and had your stomach stapled?" I freeze. I'm thinking, omg how does he know! So I reply that yes, that's pretty much it. And he's in shock. I guess he was kidding! Haha right? So I explain most people are very shocked when I tell them because I'm so little now. They can't picture me overweight. He replies "are they shocked by how small you are or by the inevitable revealing of your skin folds?" I cried for 20 minutes and blocked his phone number.

This one drives me nuts- you can't shave inside your armpits!!

Not being involved with step kids after an ended marriage is bad enough but understandable if the ex won't allow it. But not being involved with your own kids?? NOT OKAY. Not. Not okay. One thing about my ex husband (my children's father) is that he is a wonderful father. He would probably plot my murder if I tried to take our children away. He would never let them go. And that is why I loved him and had children with him. It's too bad he couldn't be as good to me as he is to them. I can't respect a man who doesn't fight tooth and nail to stay in his kids lives.

I don't know if you've seen my posts but we are experiencing similar issues. I hope your doing better!

@@foodfighter I want to address what you're saying about pain and discomfort during eating. I most definitely experience eating differently than prior to surgery. One of the things wls surgery does is it removes a hormone responsible for eventual satiety from our stomachs. Wls patients feel fullness within minutes while normal people feel it only after 20 minutes or so. So right away, eating is a less pleasurable experience because one feels full so quickly. The sense of restriction or tightness I feel is not painful but it's not pleasant either. It feels like work to get food to pass. It takes work to eat. Chewing slowly, eating slowly. It feels like a task. Before surgery I ate mindlessly while distracted. I rarely tuned in to what I was eating but became lost in the sensation of pleasure. Now I am forced to eat mindfully and the pleasure factor is way down. It's like... If I had been a Heroin addict (just an analogy!) and someone made it impossible for me to get pleasure from the drug... But I still had to use it to stay alive... It would become a tedious task overshadowed by the memory of what it used to do for me. Eating can be slightly painful for me. If I eat too fast... If I have drunk liquids near to the meal (which I admit I find very difficult not to do), if I don't chew enough, if it's a dense substance... All of these factors and more can effect how it feels to me to eat. I also find eating with little to no appetite kind of painful in a way. More repulsive than anything but definitely not pleasurable. And then there is some mental anxiety and turmoil going on when I'm wondering if I am going to dump from the meal. If I'm in company or put in public this is a real concern for me. And then there is always a level of anxiety related to weight gain. I can push that aside to some extent and of course some foods are easier than others... But I live with at least some amount of anxiety related to food at every meal. Being anxious while eating definitely drives pleasure in the food down. So all these factors put together for me create an unpleasant experience when eating. When eating used to be my drug of choice, it's now a task. I'm not saying all meals are completely devoid of pleasure but most of them are more work than anything. It's the reality of how this surgery has effected me. Food just doesn't do it for me anymore. But that was the point. And would I go back to how it was before? No way. Not in a million years.

Costco has individual bags of beef jerky around 100 calories in each. They also have individual hummus packs with crackers.

You look great sweet tea!

This one is very touching. happy for you.

Hahahahahah!!! My guy was too!! Ugh ugh blecgggg

This is very true. And I'm open to it. But I identify red flags so quickly I haven't even found someone I want to get to know on any level!

I met a guy that has all those sweet characteristics but .... I don't know. Nothing there physically. He's short but that's not a deal breaker for me.... He's not funny. He's too nice? He's not complex.... More specifically he's been married twice and walked from the kids both times. Is that a valid red flag? He's so nice and polite! Gosh I just don't know! I need that animal magnetism combined with a good person. I want both. I want my bolts of lightening and that rainbow after the storm. I want my cake and to eat it too!! So NO. still saying no.

So here is how it goes for me this week. I was super busy Sunday running around and came out 1200, 600 calories short of my total. I got a really really bad cold mon and tues and wed. Spent those days laying on the couch eating fast food and drinking soda because that's all I could do. I hate being sick. At about 1500 calories over my 1800 budget! Got better today. Ran around crazy busy with work and a date night... Skipped Breakfast (running late) had a sandwich and fruit lunch, clam chowder and bread for dinner...Came in at 600 calories total for the day. 1200 calories short of my goal. So I'm basically at square 1. This is how it goes for me. I can get my calories up if I have nothing to do but sit and eat... But as soon as I'm busy everything goes out the window. I'm frustrated. I saw this article online about what people all over the world eat every day. It varies wildly by culture. A woman in Africa lived off 900 calories a day. She didn't look so good though. Most ate around 2000-2400. I need to put Snacks in my car.

Sometimes I do have pain although not as often. I have very heavy restriction as well as severe dumping. Mainly I find it difficult and unappealing to eat, I get full very easily and stay satisfied for a very long time. I have little to no appetite and have to force food. My body requires a lot of calories and the size of my sleeve is really small. I also have some fear about eating high calorie items such as nuts but I'm working on getting over that fear. I've done okay the past couple of days. I'm working on it! I also have a doctors appt next week. Relying on Iv nutrition is unwise. That calories and nutrients can't make up for what you need to eat by mouth. Pic lines are AWEFUL, I've had two already. Tpn sucks and I won't go down that road. @@foodfighter your weight is really low. I am not sure if giving yourself three months is a great idea. Have you checked for malnutrition?

Awesome! You're both gorgeous!!

Still on a NO streak.

I'm so sorry. I know what you are going through! Thank you for your post. I really hope things turn around for you.

Thank you for posting this.

These are my favorite pictures. I'm struggling still with maintaining but I'm trying to remember how far I've come and feel happy that at least the weight is off and I'm never going to feel the way I used to feel again.