joann852

Are you afraid of an unhappy outcome of your weight loss surgery? You're not alone. Use your fear to conquer obstacles rather than letting it conquer you


For most of us starting a WLS journey, bariatric surgery is vast, uncharted territory, full of unknowns. We long for a happy outcome – maximum weight loss with minimum problems. We listen to stories told by other patients with a combination of hope (to be as successful as they’ve been) and fear (that we won’t experience the side effects or complications they talk about).
No one wants to be haunted by the specter of anxiety and dread, but I think a little bit of fear is a good thing. I don’t want fear to dominate my life, but without it, I’m likely to become complacent about my weight loss success and/or revert to the old, all-too-comfortable ways that made me obese in the first place. In small doses, fear keeps me on my toes.
Like pain tolerance, fear tolerance varies from one person to the next. Perhaps I’m able to tolerate and use fear because my childhood and adolescence were so full of fear-provoking experiences. By the time I was in my late 20’s, I actually got a little thrill out of fear, possibly because it stimulates adrenalin production. There’s nothing quite like a knife coming at you to activate your fight-or-flight system, causing a perverse fear “rush”.
At the same time, prolonged exposure to fear has also taught me to respect it. I don’t play with fear the way daredevils like Evel Knievel did, risking life and limb for the brief thrill of jumping 14 buses at a time with his motorcycle. But I do like the way fear can clear my mental field, forcing me to draw a line between important and unimportant. When the choice is survival or surrender, I’d rather choose survival. I’m not a quitter. When challenged, I’m going to fight back, especially if something precious like my health is at stake.
If fear tends to paralyze rather than mobilize you, you may have to use your own compass to navigate a problem, or play follow-the-leader (provided you have a trustworthy leader) instead. Whatever you do, don’t give in. Giving in turns you into a victim (click here to read an article about victim mentality: http://www.lapbandta...-of-obesity-r79), which is not a position of strength in any battle worth fighting. And your health is worth fighting for, isn’t it?
So, how can you make fear a working partner in your WLS journey? Let’s take a closer look at two of the more common faces of fear.
FEAR OF FAILURE
Somewhere between my first, mandatory pre-op educational seminar and my pre-op liver shrink diet, I became uncomfortably aware of a shadow that followed me everywhere. It was dark and scary, and even bigger than I was. It was my fear of failure. After decades of struggle – diets, weight loss, weight gain – I felt that WLS was my absolute last chance to be healthy. And after slogging through all those pre-op tests, evaluations, consults and procedures, I danged well was not going to fail this time.
Since I had to admit that my weight management skills were sadly lacking back then (as amply proven by the number on the scale and the numbers in my medical files), the only option available to me was to become the most compliant patient my surgeon ever had (click here to read an article about patient compliance: http://www.lapbandta...g-deal-abo-r112). I had to believe that he and his staff knew what they were doing and would guide me well. I’m a very curious and often mouthy person, so I asked a lot of questions and did my best to understand what was going on in me and around me, but I spent very little time trying to second-guess the instructions I was given. That approach freed up a lot of time and energy that I was then able to devote to changing my eating and other behaviors in ways that helped my weight loss.
FEAR OF COMPLICATIONS
Compliance served me well I this area also. I can’t claim that I was never tempted to cheat on my pre or post-op diets or to test my band’s limits. I can’t claim that I believed I’d be forever exempt from the side effects and complications I heard about from other WLS patients. But when my dietitian told me (for example) that I’d be mighty sorry if I accidentally swallowed a wad of chewing gum and had to have it scraped out of my stoma, I quickly lost my interest in chewing gum. When I observed that many bandsters experienced certain types of side effects and complications after engaging in certain types of risky behaviors, I resolved not to follow them down the road of no return.
Eventually I discovered that life after WLS can deliver some unpleasant surprises, just as in every other aspect of life. I had to learn some things the hard way, like: If you swallow a large antibiotic capsule that can’t pass through your stoma and slowly dissolves into a corrosive mess, you will end up in the ER thinking you’re having a heart attack (and end up with a big unfill). And no, liquid antibiotics don’t taste good, but they taste a lot better than the weight I regained after that unfill.
Most of the mistakes I made were the result of impatience or carelessness, but I did my best to learn from those mistakes and keep moving on. A handful of mistakes was about all it took for me to decide not to challenge the validity of my surgeon’s and dietitian’s instructions, and that kept me trudging along the bandwagon trail, getting ever closer to my weight goal. And once I reached that wonderful place, I was determined to stay there!

Good luck!! Mine is tomorrow!

I made lasanga and ziti and froze them. I'm probably freezing chicken soup next.

Making you nervous is probably exactly what your dear brother-in-law intended, and I have a strong suspicion that he got his sister's story a bit mangled. When people repeat stories like "his sister almost died from the band. She lost about 100 pounds and gained it all back then she exercised like crazy and lost it again. The band slipped after she lost it the second time and her stomach rotted. She only has 5% of it left!!", I'm terribly tempted to tell my own story. Here it goes:
"Jean lost 92 pounds with her band, had a band slip and a port flip, regained 25 lbs, land then a spaceship landed in her front yard and a very small Martian crawled into her left nostril, swam down about 10", put a rope around her esophagus, and pulled it tight so that her band flew out her mouth, taking 95% of her stomach with it, which her dogs then proceeded to eat with gusto while Jean sobbed pitifully..."
The moral of the story being that the only incidence of a band slip and band erosion (rotted stomach) at the same time in the same patient that I ever heard was posted by someone strongly suspected (by many) of being a troll. So when it comes to the risks associated with band surgery, you need to talk to your surgeon, not your brother-in-law.
Every surgery known to man carries some kind of risk. Surgical mortality with the band is extremely rare (less than 1%). Complications are possible but not certain. On the other hand, serious medical problems, including mortality, have proven association with obesity. That's why they call it "morbid obesity".

Did he tell about the thousands of obese people who die from heart attacks & strokes??
I was reading a book last night and it said about 0.03 die from it. Plus sounds like she didn't stick to the lifestyle change and dilated her pouch.
Don't listen to him! Do the research and learn the facts.
Good luck!

all surgeries have risks (even the sleeve or the bypass)
if a person does not change their eating habits (or lifestyle)
you can sometimes just end up wearing a necklace around your stomach.
you will read stories good and bad of all WLS and its up to you and your doctor which is best for you. the band is merely a tool to help you feel full (especially after your fills). its up to the person to change what they eat.
and i have found that people who do not know anything about the band or its procedure just say things (they have heard/read about). having the sleeve or the bypass has their own risks also (and also the stomach and insides cut). i chose the band over having my insides cut. its working for me. i am sure it will work for you.
again, you will come across those who are just neg nellies and you can either let it affect you or not.
best of luck on your upcoming surgery.

I'm more concerned with how they are affecting you. I hope they are not scaring you. The truth is that WL surg is the ONLY known WL method that statistically works. That means that while we can always find a few exceptions where people have lost and maintained a large amount of weight---almost all people who lose without WLS end up gaining it all back. If anyone doubts that -- all they have to do is go to Pub-Med and read the abstracts on weight loss methods over the last 40 yrs. Research very clearly shows that WLS is signficantly successful for most people who get it.
I got the LB in spring of 2008 and it has changed my life. Now everyone at work tells me that I'm a great inspiration. Even the ones who are not overweight say that I'm inspiring them to take better care of themsleves. Most of the overweight ones have asked me for a heart-to-heart talk about WLS. They have found someone they can confide in about their weight problem. Some of them have now gotten the LB too. I'm now 1 of the oldest people in my workplace but I now look like the youngest. My boss came to my office to tell me how pleased she is to see so many people in my office taking better care of their health and she says it's because they are following my lead. So ---- you GO girl! Don't let people bother you!

am gonna be tough, dont hate me please:
the first thing you need to do is quit comparing yourself to your family. you are not them. you are you. so unless you do that , you will not get anywhere.
start today with eating better. pre banding and post banding, they gave in instructions on what to eat. (Protein first, about 4 oz, veggies/fruit 2-3 oz) and drink fluids (Water crystal light). also you know to cut out the junk food, the high salt, high fat, high calorie processed. you know to eat fresh veggies, fruit and also to drink a Protein shake if you need to.
are you helping the band? or are you expecting the band to work all be itself?
if you want to start over, then start right now. (my helpful hint is to not eat over a cup of food at any time and always protein first and the most of that cup). get rid of sugery drinks, drink sf if at all possible.
you can do this.
all the best.