Bigdogkc

I am one month out, and I am now canceling this account. I joined this site to find support from people that have lived in similar situations as myself. I have found many helpful people in that reguard, but mostly there are a lot of judmental people that reply to posts in counterproductive ways, that are usually boadering on mean. If someone posts on here asking for help, you should certainly give them some answers, but if you start your reply with "Why would you go against your doctor's orders" then you are an idiot. That isn't helpful. They know they are doing something wrong, or they wouldn't have posted for help. Instead, why not actually tell them something that can help them, which will most likely be in their doctor's orders. See then you are talking from your experiance (which is what they are asking for) and not telling them they are a horrible person for not following the rules. You people on here that post those negative things that someone tried to pass as "tough love" need to understand the consequences of your actions. When someone is making mistakes, and post on here, chances are they are at a minimum down in the dumps, at worse they could be in full on depression. You don't talk down, or lecture a person in that state. You want to build them up, and make them feel like they are a part of a community that cares about them. Instead you make mean and hurtful posts, because in my opinion it makes you feel some how supieror to be able to tell someone else how bad they suck at this. If you think you are somehow helping them, you are off your rocker. You don't get to call yourself a supportive person if you are knocking someone down for making mistakes. These people need help and compassion, not for you to place yourself above them and to pass judment upon them. The funniest thing about this to me, is that every single person on here joined this site, because we have an issue. We overeat, and have never had enough disciplne to lose the weight on our own. We all needed the help of the Sleeve to lose weight, none of us have done it on our own. But some still think it is ok to talk down to people that aren't doing as well as them. Well I guess in a group of fat people that makes you the best fatty around. Congrats on being better than the rest of us. If you really are that great and special though, you don't need help, so quit coming here and ruining it for newbies. For the newbies that read this, keep in mind that the answers you want will probably be posted, but they take a little longer toget to, because the mean people seem to be on here the most and like to insult you, so they can feel better about themselves. There are more good poeple than bad here, but it i sometimes difficult to read through all the negative comments to get to the ones that are actually helpful. If you can do that, then this site can help you. Or if you are like me and the negativity is just too much, then leave and find another support group. There are other sites out there that don't have this happen nearly as often.

It never ceases to amaze me how many absolute judmental jerks post on this board. Everyone here has a problem with food, so you would think that would bring people together and they would have sympathy for eachother. The point of the board is to SUPPORT one another. Instead I see post after post from people that get up on their high horse and talk down to those that are having a tougher time than they are. That isn't helpful it is hurtful. Didn't your mothers ever teach you that if you don't have something nice to say then keep your mouth shut? Izuri - you could have made the exact same points you wanted to make, but in a supportive way, instead you sound like a stuck up, know it all, that clearly never did anything wrong ever in your life. You are not the worst one on here, so I am sorry for singiling you out, but you are the last I will read. I am through with this site, and will find one that is actually supportive. I hope for the sake of new people that come here looking for help, that you people realize how detremental you are being to those in need.

I had that last week and it was a kidney stone. If it is pretty constant and hurts really bad, then I suggest going to the ER.

I was sleeved on July 2nd, and I have had trouble drinking my entire morning shake everyday. I get it in, but it takes at least an hour, and I always feel really full. This morning I was able to drink it easily, and still felt hungry, so I had a few bites of refried beans that I had left....and I am still a bit hungry. I am not going to eat anymore until lunch, because it isn't a huge hunger feeling, but I can tell that I could have a couple more bites if I wanted to. Does this mean my stomach is pretty much healed? Does it really happen all of the sudden like that? I knew I would eventually be able to eat a bit more, which is great, I am tired of not being able to eat my protein. If this is actually a regular thing, I will be able to stop drinking the shakes and that would make me very happy. Could this be a fluke? What you pros think?

Friday morning I awoke to a sharp pain in my left side. I thought I had to use the bathroom, so I did, but no relief. It continued to get worse, so I began to fear that I had developed a leak. My wife drove me to the hospital after dropping our kids at daycare, and I thought for sure that I was going to be in a world of hurt from having a leak. They gave me a CT scan and there they saw the kidney stone. This is my 7th kidney stone, and if you have never had one you should be thankful. They compare the pain to child birth, but I have heard from women who have had both that they prefered child birth. I am a man, which makes it worse because though we can take a punch or a tackle, when it comes to pain like that, we are wimps. Anyway the ER doc couldn't understand why I was smiling when she told me I had a kidne stone. I have never been so happy to hear that news. I just got out of the hospital a couple of hours ago, and have not yet passed the stone, but I am still counting my blessings that it was not a leak.

I am sitting here at the theatre and there is popcorn all around me. Thank goodness I ate some chicken before hand. I am too full to try it anyway, but this is torture. I think it will be good for me though. I need to get used to other people eating the crap I used to. Still hard though

That is incorrect. I just took a class on HR issues and there was a big chunk of it spent on FMLA, it does cover yourself, and WLS is covered as well. Also I myself just took FMLA leave when I had my Sleeve done on July 2nd.

If you have been a full time employee at your comapny for a year you will qualify for FMLA. You still have to use your vacation and sick time (there are a few exceptions to this, but most companies make you) but you are guarenteed to still have a job when you return. If you are out of paid time off, you can still take unpaid leave under FMLA and you will still have a job whne you get back. FMLA will cover 12 weeks of time off in a year, but you should not need that. If you are confident that you can make it back in two weeks or less, and can schedule that much time off with PTO then go for it. But if not you should cover yourself by asking your HR dpartment about FMLA.

I think the condition you are in, your overall size, age and what you do on the job are factors, as is how good your surgeon is. I am a male, and was 338 the day of surgery, 35 years old, and in good health otherwise. My surgeon is reportedly the best in the mid west, and I was off one week and one day. I am a Network Admnistrator and sit at my desk for most of the day. That said, i did not make it through the first four days of work. I worked almost three full days, but then had to take Friday off, because I was too tired. i would have made it if i was able to just sit at my desk, but I got pretty busy and was having to go up and down stairs, which ruined me. I think two weeks is plenty for recovery, but if you need to do it sooner, you can as long as you have a job where you can sit and stay in one place.

Dang it. You all brought up good points. I hadn't thought of the possibility of hurting myself. I will not risk it, no reason to take that chance. Thank you for your input.

How soon after surgery has anyone tried eating popcorn? I am just over two weeks out and have been eating chicken and fish with no issues. Tomorrow night I have a free ticket to see Batman and there will also be free popcorn. I will eat before hand because I need to get my Protein in, but I was thinking about trying a few bites of popcorn too. Do you think that could hurt? Thanks

Remember this isn't an all or nothing thing. You are talking about being upset over two meal out of 21 for the week. You did great 95% of the time!! That is awesome. Sure we should all shoot for 100% and most weeks we can hit that, but slipping up a couple of meals over the course of a week is not a big deal. The shrink I had to see preop said that most overweight people are all or nothing people, which is why we have trouble losing weight. We do good for a while, but then we slip up, and instead of rebounding and getting back on track, we get upset and just throw it all out the window and keep eating poorly. That sounds like what you are dealing with. I used to do the same thing before when I tried to lose weight. You have to forgive yourself and just rebound to making better decisions. Don't beat your self up, or punish yourself. Reward yourself by eating healthy foods that will make you feel better and look better. Nobody is perfect, and I think you are doing a great job, hang in there!!

I made chicken noole soup and just had the broth of it. That made a huge difference, plus my wife made some egg drop soup which was perfect too. Just adding a little variety was all I needed to get by.

I am only two weeks out, but I am having similar feelings. I am sure it will pass with time, and weight loss. Yesterday was very difficult on me, and I was pretty down in th dumps all day. This moring I woke up and went for a long walk, and I am feeling much better. I think there is something to be said for being active when you feel down. It may not beeasy, but it was worth doing. And remember that someday you will be able to eat some calzone and burritto, it jus tmay take three or four meals to finish it.

My Dr. has me eating tuna, chicken salad, eggs, soft cheese,lunch meat, fish, shrimp.... pretty much anything that is a lean Protein and I could start on that at week two. I can't have much of anything, but it is nice get some protein from somewhere other than the shakes. I still have to have one shake a day, and should probably do two, but i don't. It seems weird that there is such a discrepency on menus after the surgery. I was only on Clear liquids for two days, then i could start having other items, and then even more at 7 days post op. the only issue i have had is trying to figure out the right portion size. i ate alittle too much twice and it sucked. I felt bloated for an hour after both times. Thankfully i was eating slowly, so i realized it before I ate so much that i threw up. I will take an hour of bloated over throwing up anyday!

Your cheats sound minor, plus you have a week to make up for it. Don't sweat it, just try harder this week and you will be fine. I am sure there have been doctos that canceled before, but if you are losing wieght, and not haveing a ton of carbs or fat, then you should be ok, in my opinion.

I knew there would be some pain, but after surgery on Monday I was in more pain than I thought I would be. Thankfully it passed after a few hours. Now I am just sore, which I fully expected. Just like I read from a bunch of others, it took time to learn how to drink water again. Now I feel like a pro and am not worried about getting enough in. I agree with Patrick that the gas pain has been the worst of it. I still have yet to have a moment where I regret the decision. My nurse told me I would be regretting it for a while, but I told her I didn't care how bad it hurt; I was doing what I needed to do to lose weight, so I was here for my family. No regrets, though I do wish I could fast forward a week or so. I hope all the rest of the July sleevers are doing well. Everyone is different, but please feel free to ask me anything you would like to know, nothing is too private, I will share anything if it will help you in some way. Bigdogkc (Matt)

That is a fair point. I apologize for calling everyone, but myself a d**k. I am a little on edge here, and get frustrated with people that are not supportive. You are right though, I should not call poeple names.

See that sounds excellent to me. I just would see that coupled with the, if you can't do it, then you shouldn't have surgery.

Sorry, I was trying to be humourous, in reference ot your post you made a little earlier. How you were saying you were opinonated, and what not. I did not mean that to read that way...jees there goes my cred making fun of other peoples grasp of our language.

The english language is quite easy for me to comprehend, but you are right.... The intent was to feel superior, the result was being insulting. You seem to skirt that line yourself. I am no longer worried about cheating I have a routine thanks to Nancy the nutritionist.

You igonorance of the english language is not my fault, try educating yourself. You and others made the assumption that I said can I eat every day all the time, and what ever I want. I said nothing like that, and again if a reply is not supportive then what is the point. They were not being generous with their time. the were being dicks, much the same way you are. I know, cause I am also a d**k. "Tough Love" is not being "tremendously supportive. "Tough love" is what you give someone, when all else fails. This was my first post asking for help form people i figured might be sympathetic. Hey it's cool if you are a d**k too, just keep your mouth shut, and post somewhere else.

I have seen some recent replys that have not been very supportive, so now that i am over a week into my pre-op diet let me review this for you. First I posted that i was having trouble, and was very tempted to cheat. If I was already going to cheat, then why would I post a question asking for you alls permission? I posted because i felt weak and was looking for support. Thankfully that is what i got. I also got some people, who i think very little of that said that if I cheat, then I am not ready for the surgery, and/or I will cheat after the surgery. Wow, you folks need some help of your own. that isn't tough love, that is projecting your own short commings onto others. Second - I updated that I was able to get through it, because my nutrionist told me I could eat some lean Protein. i have all three of my shakes, and then eat a little tuna, or chicken in the evening if I am hurting. A couple of nights i made it without anything. Third - I did end up cheating. I went on vacation last weekend and one night at dinner, I was watching TV, and happened to eat four of my son's nachos that he could not finish. I felt like an idiot, and told my surgeon about it yesterday at my final pre-opp appointment. His response was to smile and tell me that it was not a big deal since I stuck to it before that, and went right back to it. Most importatly, in my opinion when you reply to a person's post, that is looking for support, and if they posted on here that is exactly what they are looking for... Then don't be a jerk. Yes I needed someone to be honest and tell me that I need to stick with it, but I don't need to be insulted, belittled, or put down in any other way. The reason i joined the site was to learn from those who went before me, to have some mentors. Mentors and teachers don't yell at there students until they really screw up. so to sum up.... If you replied to this thread and you thought you were giving "tough love" Go "tough love" yourself and keep me out of it. I appreciate those of you that were actually decent people and were supportive. Those that were not, can kiss my soon to be shrinking fat ass. Good Day

we are having a very similar experiance. I also have my final pre-opp appointment with the doc this afternoon. i may have to ask him about a final meal too. My surgery is at 11:00 on the 2nd, so i would imagine you are before me; try not to wear him out too much for mine.

After one week, I cheated once, but it wasn't too bad. I didn't go out for pizza or anything, just had a couple spoon fulls of Beans. I can not think of anything I have done in my life that was more difficult than this, but it is half way over now. distractions are the best thing to keep you honest, and making sure you drink your shakes before you get too hungry,