lizrbit

dots are another thing. everytime i go to the movies, i gotta have something to eat. we used to sneak low carb snack bars and low carb treats like beef jerky in, worked okay, but i have a big weakness for dots. they are like gummy jelly beans without the hard candy surface. and they fit right through the hole. i eat one at a time, and chew it all over my teeth. i am honestly hoping this first fill will give me some real strength to fight this stuff off. My honeymoon feeling lasted until my rebanding, and now i find its wayning. I still get out there and walk every day, as well as ride my bike outside each morning. im still trying. now theres no tiramisu or dots in the house i stand a chance. we leave tomorrow to go to houston. My appointment is the thirteenth. Im going to ask him to just fill the damn thing up. fill it all the way up.

Alex!!!! Congratulations!!! i know this has been hanging overhead for a while! so have you talked to your dr about type yet? SInce the ap band has been released publicly you can get upgraded!

i leave you people alone for a day or two and you start throwing peanuts. I got married the first time when i was 16. I had my oldest son a week before i turned 17. I was divorced 14 days later. worked on my own with the boy for a while until i realized how little i was going to make with my lack of skills or education, Moved to another state with the boy since child support or visitation wasnt wanted or desired, got job, went to college, and then i met "the tall guy". I used to see him each morning at a four way intersection on our way to school each morning. He never saw me. I remember praying. i remember saying "if you give me this one thing, i swear, ill never ask for anything else".... within a few months after that, we started dating. He already knew my son from school interactions and social stuff and they got along wonderfully. I told him i couldnt "date" someone if there wasnt any possibility of a future, and he said, 'well when can you move in?" My son and i moved in with him after a few months. Hes the only man the boy ever called "dad". We have three sons altogether. I dont regret my first marriage. here let me say it again... I DONT regret my first marriage. It was fun and was a better situation (as bad as it got) than what i was in before. I dont regret leaving when i did. i dont regret test driving cars. I was a woman after all and have needs too. To hell with people that dont acknowledge that. i dont regret not dating all the cars i drove i really dont regret meeting the tall guy. i dont regret our 20 yrs together. I wish many of those years had sex in them. but i cant go back and change that. all i got is today. im jiggy with that. on another note: my dog is buddhist. i probably should mention that. (we hang out alot and if im not careful i can get lost in her calmness)

hoos, thank you so much. it feels good just to have put it out there, you know? i wont give up. today is a new day....and the danger is gone lol.. husband, enabling, loves me. i know he does. he doesnt think in terms of 'whats best' sometimes, i think he saw it and knew id be all over it...and didnt think it through? maybe. thats a thing all by itself. but anway, im digressing... Thank you for writing and for understanding. We started off at the same place. I sincerely appreciate your shoulder. I wont give up today. If i can get it back on track today, ill probably feel better about it.

i ate an entire taramisu cake, from friday midday to late last night. and its not the only thing ive eaten. My choices are USUALLY very good. these...'attacks' hit me out of the blue.

the whole thing

hoos! i totally relate to that. i do. i walk four miles each evening, and bike eight each morning. i honestly believe its the only reason i havent gained more... but its not the only thing. i binge eat. it comes from nowhere and hits me. ive TRIED leaving the house AT those times and i go right back in and grab what ive been obsessing over and put it in my face. friday, husband brought home a taramisu cake. im the only one in the family who loves this stuff. its sunday, and its gone and i ate it.

i feel like ive been in a downward spiral into negativeland. I am gaining. ive gained back everything ive lost since being rebanded. i currently weigh what i did when i went in. I have not had a fill yet. its my own fault. I had work stuff going on and couldnt schedule the flight until now. My fill is in five days and i really cant wait. I have big hopes. i really blew it this weekend. im wide open and i hope that i can get ahold of this and reign it back in. im increasing my activity, and i believe its the only reason why i havent gained MORE.

i did this for the first month or so of being banded initially. im back to normal now but ive also stopped losing weight (need a fill, getting it soon). it will balance itself out, but if this continues for more than four months, id schedule an appointment with your obgyn and get a professional opinion.

taramisu. i was doing "okay". i get on kicks and cant get off them. i eat food in phases, like "the birthday cake phase" and "the kfc phase" ..see where im going? Friday my husband brings home an entire taramisu. its one of my most favorite desserts. Its Sunday, and ive eaten the entire thing, sometimes three slices at a time. I tried not looking at it, i tried going hiking. I even ate a bowl of cereal INSTEAD and later went back in and got the remaining pieces. i go in for my first fill after being rebanded in five days. i cant wait, and im looking forward to getting the fill...but you know what? tarimisu can get through regardless. i have to be more careful. i feel like i failed. it will take a while to shake this.

ghost, i nearly cried when i read about your aversion to physical affection with your mom. Im going through bigtime mom issues right now. I have a very strong aversion to my mother. i love part of her on one hand, but on the other hand, if i never spoke to her or saw her again i would be very okay with that. my mom is an alcoholic and there are big dramatic horrible secrets going all the way back to thirteen for me that NO ONE in my family will address. I have tried and its useless. Now she needs me. The one time in her life where she genuinely needs me, and she wants to pretend we are close and that shes always been this close loving mother...and i just cant do it. part of me wants to. if she was TRYING to quit drinking, i think i really could trust it and give it another shot..and yeah, ive told her this directly at various times...where she promises the changes..and anymore not even fifteen minutes passes before shes forgot everything she laid out there and goes right back to how she lives. My heart goes out to you. I hope that one way or another you get some peace with that issue, even if its reassurance that you would never have to feighn (spellin?) physical affection if you dont genuinely want to show it, or to just have the ability to enjoy the mutual affection. I hope it works out in any case. i dont know where my relationship with mine is going to go. Im willing to just let it go at this point. I just dont have it in me to give.

Dear Sherrylynn, my dr had me on a liquid diet prior to banding. its important you lose a few lbs before surgery to shrink your liver. Id never..NEVER ...fasted before and was worried...as LONG as you get in alot of protein each day you can go a week without solid food! its true. Mine had me drink FOUR high protein slim fasts or atkins shakes a day plus drink a buttload of fluids. chicken broth worked for dinner, hot tea for breakfast, and lots and lots of protein shakes. AMAZINGLY once i stuck to the program it wasnt so bad. i had NO energy but told myself it was okay, it was for this specific reason and only for this week. you can do this. also.. i LOVE MoNCTON!!! i have six large paintings (four foot by four foot) hanging in a building on Vaughn Harvey? its been a while since ive been out there. I live in northern maine. Drop me a Private message and ill send you my regular email address. GOOD LUCK!

my first fill is scheduled for July 12. I really cant wait. i was at 283 when i was rebanded may 24. i got down to 275 (-12 lbs) then bounced back up to 282, then with alot ALOT of effort im hoovering around 278. so... im trying to aim for solid protiens at meals...but according to my FitDay - Free Weight Loss and Diet Journal im still doing way too many carbs, and im rarely eating breads. I found a lot of hidden carbs in things like raisins and fruit. im eating a great deal. ive been brutally honest with the fitday thing. i am trying to increase my activity. I feel like a junkie looking for a fix when i think about the fill. lol. "cmon dr delicious, gimme that sweet spot fill".....

lol jcgrove...no....from maine to florida is just too much a jaunt! for now... hahahahahahahhaah. you make some great and valid points there...we all start somewhere. its wierd to think about a few months ago, to realize that im already taking some things for granted that i just couldnt do before. When it gets cumbersome to do the morning rides, i use the bike as literal transportation to get from point a to point b. Trips to the grocery are fun on a bike and ive learned how to carry big bags on the handlebars. it is a bit tricker on a varied terrain. I think its smart to build up from somewhere. even if its just getting on the bike, peddling to the end of the block, and walking it back, its somewhere and a good start. if you cant do the end of the block, the end of the driveway? to the other side of the garage? it all counts. even if its just a small step, its an entire step better than the day before.

i dont know what brand mine is, but i know its soy whey protien. Its cheap too. i get it at walmart for thirteen dollars a large can, (before i spent over 125 dollars on isopure). when i switched i started losing weight, but ... my nutritionalist looked at me sternly. said she wants me to only do it once a week or so now and ONLY as Meal Replacement, because...after we heal...here it comes are you ready? "we arent supposed to drink our calories"... but in the mornings these days i cant do solid food. which will change from day to day. i think my surgeon has a remote control. i like them for breakfast. i also like them to use as Meal Replacements for the rest of the day if i have a pb. i put a lot of stuff in mine. a happy beth shake: In blender put: •one small container of probiotic yogurt •half the same container of 2percent milk •ten pecans •one scoop of protien powder • one tablespoon flax seed oil (to balance the powder and make my hair gorgeous) •mulitivitamin, calcuim,iron, b12, collegen capsule, acidolpholis (i hate taking pills so its easier for me to grind them up into the shake where i wont taste them) • a serving of metemucel • two fat strawberries from a bag of frozen ones i keep in the freezer • a medium banana after blending it should fit into a pint glass with no problem. its VERY THICK and sticks to the sides of the glass. (like it sticks to the insides of you!) my husband HATES these and refuses to drink them. I dig them, but i like strange things. it has the consistancy of pudding pretty much. I drink half of it before i go out on my morning bikeride, then half when i get back while im getting ready for work. i think as long as your carb count is low you should be okay with protien powder, just remember they tell us not to drink our calories, unless tight or pb and only as a meal replacement, after you are past the initial full liquid stage.

Hi Vanessa and all, I live in northern maine, but had both bandings as well as all subsequent fills in Houston. I fly down to Houston Texas from Maine each month. I have never had a problem with flying and tightness. My surgeon has never had a problem filling me knowing i was flying out the next day. He prefers me stay two days so i will know if ill be too tight or not in time to adjust it, and i do. but i gotta tell you...ive never had a problem with tightness on flight, home after flight or anything surrounding the flights.

hahahhhahaha...breathe..hahahahahhahah swallow it slowly....hahhahhahhahahaha...

yeppers lucy, id talk to your dr about your dosage, and if theres another route to go... what floors me is that my nutritionalist says that as we lose weight, often there are a LOT of hormones trapped in the fat and as the fat burns down the hormones are released...making the labido more intense. WHEN im losing (which is rare for me these days i desperately need a fill) then i can see an improvement there..bigtime...but when im not it kinda dwindles down to "eh"..

kaohinani, lmao= Laughing My Arse Off

Kim! im just a month out from being rebanded (i had a leak) and im back in bandster hell too. its that phase between healing and your first substantial fill that is SO hard to not only understand but to just get through without regaining. im on the upswing. i know i need a fill...i have an appontment scheduled for July 12 down in houston with my surgeon (who does my fills too) and im excited about it. i hope its an agressive fill and will help me back on the track down. im on my sons computer but later when i get to mine at the studio, ill save and send you a direct email. Im so glad to have met you!

lmao...man...

yay green! ah, there is romance in the air..

Leedor, i am with Faith on this one, that i would find a fill center and go. I cant imagine going in requesting a fill and not getting one. It hasnt happened to me yet, i cant imagine it happening. I think id try to be a normal person at first but i believe, knowing myself, that id probably protest...loudly... girl id go to a fill center. definitely.

lmao... GO GREEN GO GREEN GO GREEN! i laughed SO hard when i read your post. here in presque isle its much like that..in the winters no one shaves nothing. and FAITH....ripping the hair off your husbands testiclees.... Im on the freaking floor laughin.... I shaved my legs and refound something...no not my hoohoodilly...found that again already...no i brought this stuff back with me from galveston and i LOVE it. I found the extra tub of it i bought and tucked away with my razor!!! I got this stuff from this place called Bath Junkie, i believe its a chain...and its this salt scrub with ground apricot seeds and soap and fragrant oils. you get to choose your scent and they have like 200 different ones. in the TUB, AFTER you shave your legs and those scraggly few hairs that hang from the chin (LOVe getting older) scrub this stuff into your incisions and legs, pits, elbows, feet and chin then ...SOAK! woo... im SOOO SOFT...and i smell SOOO good... i love the salt scrub. They also make a lotion that isnt really a lotion. its made from tapioca so it dries to a very thin absorbant powder! and i like that i can scent it anyway i want. They mix it right there in these big metal bowels. i dig it. i am going to try to get a job/job there this winter.

Oh ma gosh...i cant stop laughin... a gallon...twice n thirty minutes...wash it down with something cold...bwahahahahahahahhahahaha. now thats funny. hey...wait a minute....i just thought of something.. if you dont "like" doing that, you could use your band as an excuse???? :eek: "oh my dr says i cant let that go there, it will erode the band" hahahahahahahahha I cant imagine even asking my dr about this one.