TerriDoodle

The thing that strikes me about his behavior is that he seems to be indulging the other woman's need for attention even though he says he wants to work on his marriage. To be blunt, it says to me that he doesn't have the gonads to be FIRM with her and tell her, with finality, that it is over....not necessarily that he 'misses her' and is torn between the two of you. The fact that he succumbed in the first place (that she "worked on him until he gave in" ) tells me that he has an issue with boundaries...coupled with his depression...makes for one helluva weak fellow. He's got 2 women...one is wiley the other is strong and intelligent. The guy doesn't stand a chance until he grows some kahunas and takes a stand. It is not easy by any means. It is, however, entirely necessary. The same goes for you, Zannie. I agree that you should outline your terms but without drama or tears or sarcasm or spite. You are simply defining your boundaries. That is way healthy for you and maybe will push him into some sort of meaningful action. BTW, I am not a licensed health professional!! My advice is worth exactly what you pay for it! Just been there, done that and have at least 1 T-shirt.

Omnipaque (iohexol) it's a contrast medium that they use for doing diagnostic testing like angiograms. It's thicker than saline and is completely safe if it should leak out of the band.

Won't the liquigels get stuck if you're restricted? And if they do, aside from the obvious discomfort, that medication is SO caustic and hard on your stomach lining. I'd kill for 3 Advil right now. My back is hurting and the liquid stuff just isn't cutting it for some reason. Prolly cause I need to drink the whole dang bottle (at $6/bottle!) to get the action of 3 pills!

Can't you find a doc in Dallas to do your fills?... or you just want to take advantage of the free ones from Dr. Spivak? (makes sense)

That's great restriction, Tracy! I can't even look at tuna right now. I had soup.....again. I'm scheduled for an unfill on Thursday. They offered to do it today but I'm gonna just wait and see.

Thanks, Ya'll. I hope you're all right. One of the main motivators for quitting was so that I could push my cardio workouts .... I seemed to be limited to 40-45 mins. max. I felt I could do better if I just didn't get so tired! I'll let you know how I do. For now my back is still tender.

I have two suggestions...take either one (or none!): 1) Just get a .1 cc fill and see how you do. 2) If you feel too tight after that, make sure you give it a chance for the swelling to go down (assuming you can get liquids down)....really baby it by going on liquids for 2 days, then mushies for 2 days before trying regular foods. If you're still too tight, go back to 2.3 and review the bandster rules and make sure you're eating properly (which actually you should do now)...and get some exercise!! My doctor filled my band with Omnipaque to avoid that situation. Works like a charm. Ask your doctor if he does that. Very wise words, Tracy!! Thanks for that little pep talk because every word is SO right!! We get so focused on what's going wrong that we don't look at what is going right. We've only been at this a few months for crying out loud. Denise - I'd hold off on the fill til your stress level goes way down. The last thing you need is MORE stress from a band that's too tight. Wait a couple of weeks. As for your DD, whatever your terms were when you kicked her out, that is what you HAVE TO stick with. I strongly suggest you take a couple of days to decide and that will also let her know you're not gonna jump just 'cause she snaps. In those couple of days go to AT LEAST ONE Al-Anon meeting...if not more. Don't rush into anything....there's no hurry. (((Huggs))) I thought I was gonna propel Propel out my nose when I read this!!! GOOD JOB Michelle!! Take it however you can get it, girlfriend! :clap2: I give up. Scheduling an unfill for Thursday, hopefully. I can't live on liquids forever. Still holding to 188. :phanvan Day 8 of my Quit!

Anybody else see something wrong with this sentence??

I am confessing to falling off the exercise wagon. I quit smoking 7 days ago and that first week I was pretty depressed. I just didn't CARE about going to the gym. Not at all. I was just giving myself lots of permission to do anything I wanted....except smoke. Ok...so that worked. I'm still smoke free. Well, now it's time to get back at it. Enough rest. EXCEPT that Saturday I had a massage and the masseuse was doing some wierd quad stretches on me and has apparently hurt my lower back quite badly. I have a weak back anyway. It WAS getting so much better with exercise and now, today, I can barely walk. It's gonna take another 2-3 days before I can get to the gym. Somebody tell me that it's OK...that I am a new person...that I haven't fallen into my old trap ....and that I"ll be back at the gym in no time. I need a drill sargeant to come kick my ass by Thursday if my back is better. Any volunteers?

I was told to take it real easy for 4 weeks, except for walking. So I went ahead and joined a gym and got on the treadmill every day....walked as far as I wanted. I went for the 4 week follow up and he gave me the clearance to do whatever I wanted....just not to lift any "very heavy weights". 4 weeks seems to be the standard answer, but your surgeon may be different.

Oh, I LOVE soup! All kinds! Tonight I'm going to have broccoli cheese soup. I bought some good ready-made at the store last night. I even have to chew the broccoli bits to shreds! Tomato sounds good, too! I have some of that in the pantry as well. I'm gonna have to go with the highest protein...I think I've only got like 35g today so far.

PCGirl...first of all, Welcome! You sound exactly like me when I went to my doctor for the first consultation. I told him I could just see the future right now...me, weighing 275 with diabetes and high lipids and blood pressure and not being able to successfully lose one single pound. All I needed now to head off this monster was a tool to help me control hunger. He agreed saying I sounded like a very good candidate and should have great success! I am happy to report that I have lost weight, feel great and my hunger is under control. It's kinda scary sitting where you are, I know. Just stick around LBT for awhile. It's a wonderful place and we will calm your nerves. This is a big decision and you need real information. This is the place to get it. Good luck to you!

It's the port you feel...the band is much deeper in your abdomen. I can feel mine too! It doesn't go away.

I have to say that I AM amazed that I'm not about to pass out from hunger considering how little I've eaten the last 3 days. I just miss solid food....vegetables especially. I'd kill to be able to eat a nice chunky bowl of veggie soup. Oh well, I signed on for this! Guess what??! I had a massage on Saturday and the masseuse screwed up my lower back!!!!!!!!! I am in pain! I just can't believe this. I feel like calling them and telling them I want my %*#&! money back! Laura - speaking of backs...how's yours lately?

Will You People Stop Talking About Food???

The grape flavor is disgusting. I find the berry flavor to be much more tolerable. I'm beginning to really hate liquid medications....reminds me too much of my childhood and all those earaches and sore throats and endless tablespoons of some gooey yellow sulphur-tasting medication. Some kind of bactrim, I suppose. OMG. YUCK. I can still taste it.

I have occassional back pain that won't get better very quickly unless I take ibuprofen! I just take 4-5 tsp. at a time. I understand why we can't take ibuprofen pills, but I figured the liquid was OK. Does anyone else use this occassionally?

TracyKS - didn't you say ice cream was good for a swollen stoma?? I think I need some.

I would say that whether you can afford it or not, you need to find a way to see your doctor. Are you getting fluids down?

I just saw this........You DOG! Yep, I was there on Wednesday from about 11:30-12:45ish? I can't believe you didn't say hello!!! Did you see me talking to 2 women?...or later when I came out? The waiting room was crowded when I left! We oughta wear some kind of "LBT" patch or something when we go in there for a fill!! I would have loved to meet you! Looks like I'll be going back very soon...I"m very tight and will probably have to go for a little unfill. The good news is that I'm rarely very hungry!

....and I'm filled with it. I just got my 4th fill and the omnipaque is holding perfectly! I lost .5cc of saline between my 1st and 2nd fill.

Well, the fills are really nothing to worry about. They usually go quite smoothly, so there's not reason to worry that yours will be any different! And the gas pain is manageable and temporary! Don't worry! Be happy!!

Oh, it's been a loooooooooooong few days with this new fill of mine. I PB'd all weekend...I don't know how many times...I think 3 or 4 and one of them was BAD. Of course it was while we were sitting in a wonderful restaurant with my sister- and mother-in-law. I had 2 bites of scrambled eggs, a bite of canteloupe and a tiny bite of sausage. I had to leave the table THREE times. As I sit here now I am totally stuck on one bite of cottage cheese! I am determined to ride this out until Friday or Monday. I will not hesitate to go for an unfill if it's not better by then. I don't have any problems with water or protein shakes... only food of just about any kind. What a difference between TracyKS and I, eh? Josie - How's your restriction these days?? Kat - Your garden is making my mouth water!! I'd kill for some squash...if I could only eat it!! Pamela - How's your state of mind these days?? You sound a bit subdued. (((Love you!))) Laura, MsJen, TracyK, Haydee -- HI!! :wave: Ya'll have a good day!

Denise -- My best friend has been going thru the same ordeal for the last 8 months or so. Loooong story short, it is the best thing she could have done -- NO doubt about it. He is sober now (after 90 days in jail!) and is going today for his physical to join the Navy. This is a brilliant young man who had the world by the tail until he started drinking as a senior in high school. He was a straight A student, never had to study, a computer genius and played 5 instruments...all by ear. Incredibly sad, eh? He's homeless now, been in jail twice, lost his car, job, and friends. All he has left now is the love of his family, but NOT their enabling ways. In hindsight, this is the only way that he had any chance at recovery. It has been the hardest year of my dear friends' life. She said if she had done anything differently it would have been to get into therapy and Al-Anon much sooner for her own mental health. There's no point in her taking all of you down with her. She's an adult (maybe not a mature one) and she has made her choice. Time to grow up. You are certainly in my thoughts and prayers. I am proud of your courage. (AND you look so wonderful in your pics!!! You are such a beautiful woman!) Xoxo

Sorry, Zannie. Wish things were so different! Having been there, done that I would imagine that he will not fully realize the damage he is doing to himself until you and the kids are long gone....when it is much too late. You sound like a very intelligent woman and I am glad you are getting some professional advice as well. Please continue to take care of yourself....you're doing great.