scared

i have my next consultation appointment (my second) on 5/29. The surgeon that i have is very appointment oriented as he will see you and then say "come back in 4 weeks" and see where we are. I no longer want to wait another 4 weeks. I am scared to death that i am not going to be able to do the right thing post surgery as far as eating the proper foods and staying away from carbs, but at the same time I no longer want to look in the mirror and see what I see. I know that i cannot do this alone, if i could i would have done it already. i really do not want to break down in front of my surgeon next week but i honestly feel that if he tells me to follow-up again in 4 weeks i will have a complete break down. i feel so hopeless about the entire thing...and insurance isn't even to blame. :cursing: