helluva day

So its 15 days till I leave for Mexico. I saw my mom yesterday. I'd only told her a week ago (and debated at that) She was very supportive, asked me if I was scared about going to Mexico. I said to her, no, I'm not afraid at all about that, I've done my research, I've talked to countless people, I'm confident about that. Its just this friend I'm loosing that I'm sad about. Food is my best friend. How will I cope? How will I make it? In moments of desparity, I wonder if I am doing the right thing. It doesn't take me long to realize that I am though. I have a sexy pic of myself years ago at a party in some snug fitting Levis and a hot little shirt, THAT is my constant motivation. Today I was going crazy trying to get way too many things done, I noticed at lunch that I'd just 'forgotten' to eat. That's what gets me every time. I swung through Wendy's and got a club sandwich. Just chunked the bread and wrapped the lettuce around turkey, swiss and bacon drank a bottle of water and ate a few baked lays. I was pondering on how easy that was. ITS JUST FOOD, I thought. Its going to nourish you. I keep trying to pump myself up, trying to convince myself that my choices are bad, not me. For today at least, I believe that. Tomorrow is another day....to be continued