So, I called Tony from Dr. Hess' office on Friday to see if they got my MMPI test results yet, and he said no but that they should be there any day. He said if I haven't heard back from him by Tuesday to call him...so that's exactly what I'm going to do.

My diet is slipping a bit, i'm not staying in my ww points as well as I was, and i'm not working out as often. It's just difficult, but I'm trying very hard. i'm trying so hard to stay on track so hard to pick myself back up when I fall.

i'm also just not stable with my personal life, and don't know what to do, J just stays in my head all the time, and wears me out. I can't get over him, and he just uses me up, uses up my emotions. I want to be over him, I want to move on.

anyway, this is about my band, nothin more nothin less, but I know he is effecting all that and I just don't know how to end it, how to stop him from effecting me so much

ps i'm PMSing big time

I promise to go to the gym at least 5 times this week.

I promise I promise I promise i promise

Its all about you now, Not him. You have been given a great gift and possibility for a fantastic healthy future. Think of each mile you walk or run as one more mile closer to your freedom and happiness. Even if you don't make it to the gym just keep active for at least an hour a day. Hang in there.