March 25th 2007

I'm gald I found this site... I made my decision & booked my surgery quite quickly. I had been secretly contimplating it for a while, but it was just fantasy until I suddenly realised hey, maybe you need this! I have yet to have my consultation though so I may not even be approved, but I'm hopeful. My yoyo history has to be a factor in their decision.

Funny enough, there have been 2 coincidences so far in the place I have chosen to have it done. One being the hospital has the same name as me & the company I am going with is the same name as my own family company...weird or what?

Anyway After reading a lot of experiences on this site I've had to seriously think about what I am about to do & the consequences involved & the way my life is going to change. I never really had a plan....until now.

I am going to go into this 100% committed, and log every minute of it... I want to see my own road to recovery. My strengths, weaknesses & demons & how I overcome the obsticles...although I feel there will be few as I am not here to fight myself anymore.

What I see from this site & the shared experiences is that it is crucial to be patient & most of all... to become a student of my own body & master of my mind.

I will regard the band as my tool, my aide & friend to guide & help me stop the self destruction of continuing to waste my life as a self loathing fat person.

To help me committ to myself & reward my efforts & decisions with confidence, dignity & pride.... Today is the first step in this journal. :clap2:

Here are my goals...

To be free from yoyo dieting

To be free from self loathing

To be free of dissappointment in myself

To be proud of my image

To be comfortable in my appearance

To communicate that I am beautiful

To have a beautiful wardrobe

To have style

To Relearn Piano

To write songs again

To be a mother

To contribute happiness & drive to my marriage

To be a loving friend

To keep a beautiful home

To turn a hobby into a business

To take long walks for pleasure instead of weight loss

To spend more time outdoors

To take pride in my garden

To take pride in myself

To be happy

To start participating in life again

:clap2: