Ready to go back to work

GM Everyone,

I am almost 3 weeks post op and I'm ready to go back to work. I really feel it's because I lost my spouse on 11/28/12 and my grief is still very raw. Being home all day is a 24/7 constant reminder that I don't have him by my side. When I looked to the left, he was always there, he was my rocked when I faltered and it's a constant, unbearable hurt.

I MISS HIM!!! At least while I was at work that was 8hrs of my day that I needed to concentrate on something other than my grief. And although that was hard as hell, being home all dayum day is harder, I'm 21.5 pds down and on the soft stage phase 2,

I stepped on the scale and noticed I gained like a pd 1/2 back. How is that possible? I thought the meaning of being sleeved was to lose, not gain.

Anyway, lot's of mixed emotions going on this morning, I'm going to pray on them and let my mind get back to continued success at this life changing decision.

Blessings,

MzO